2003-10-15

My string of projects are ENDLESS. Ok enough excuses. Actually I am just not very motivated to blog nowadays, but here we go to the projects issue again. I have no motivation to blog because I have no life to blog about. And I have no life to blog about because I am doing projects DAILY. WTF.

But today! Today I have a life again. Thats because I did something drastic finally.

To those of you who liked my curls... I'm sorry but they are not longer existent. Thats because I went to rebond my hair. To add, I cut my bangs into a straight cleopatra-like style. (some people might be mumbling under their breaths that they do not care whether I rebonded my hair or not, but I would like to say that similarly, I do not care abt your opinion as this is my blog and I shall write what I want. So there.)

Pictures? Here you go.



I'm sorry that it is so blur, thats because I took the picture without flash and I had to jack up the brightness.

Anyway, the fringe was cut one day before I rebonded my hair. I came home, looked at my lifeless self in the mirror, and decided I need a change. So I took a pair of scissors, and sniped off my fringe. I think its some fetish that we all have, and I started to cut more and more.

I ended up looking like a stupid jap doll with the fringe and curls. I went to school, and everyone said I looked "sweeter", "more innocent", "cuter" etc. It infuriated me. "CUTE" IS NOT WHAT I WANT! Remember the image I wanna achieve?? I WANNA LOOK RICH, NOT SWEET!

So Jealous June suggested rebonding, and weirdly enough, was so enthusiatic about it that she even lent me a hundred bucks to do it, plus accompanied me to the salon where she sat about while I had my hair done. What a wonderful friend I have.

Thats not the point. The point is.... 50% of people say it is nicer, while the other 50 say they perfer curls. I have never seen such an equal stand before. Whatever it is, it is still a change. Afterall I had my curls for 1 year already, and I am sick of having to style it everyday. Rebonded is good and easy.

Halloween is coming up! Eileen brought me to this place called No 1 Costumes Costumes (It really has two "costumes" in its name), where we went to try on clothes to wear to Zouk on the 31st Oct. Here's what I tried. Naturally, Cleopatra.



Its 60 bucks for 3 days. I have no idea why I should pay that ridiculous amount, and I dun even need the stupid costume for 3 days. 60 bucks can buy me a 64mb memory stick, and I cannot think of why I shld give it to the costume shop for a piece of shiny thing that probably a million people have wore before.

I didn't rent it of course. Neither did Eileen.

But I'm still going to Zouk nonetheless, perhaps with some silly white tube to become a common angel.

I wanna bitch about something.

Yesterday I was on my way to city hall after school, feeling sore at my calfs, for I wore heels and had conquered Mount Dover (the silly slope at SP) on my way to the MRT. As usual, I squeezed to the middle and rooted myself standing in front of a particular seat, hoping that the person sitting would get down the next stop.

And he did exactly that!

How pleasing!

However, I was busy playing with Bejeweled on my Clie, and was a little slow in sitting down. Just as I turned my ass to face the seat, this fellow managed to squeeze pass me and sat on my seat.

I WAS FURIOUS. Its extremely rude.

I looked to see who the culprit is, and I saw it is this SP guy. Now, he is different as he is deformed. Not in a handicapped way though, he is just very short. Like a dwarf.

My first reaction was, "Oh no, how could I even think of snatching the seat from him... He is handicapped...". And I started to feel pretty guilty.

The fellow had two other SP classmates (males) with him, and they started to happily chat. They talked about normal school stuff at first, and then they started to talk loudly about crude topics, like sex. And its not even normal sexual stuff. They were discussing how ANIMALS HAVE SEX. Several MCP remarks were made, although I cannot remember what is it they said. My point is, the "handicapped" fellow is not a nice guy at all.

I thought about it. If he can talk about sex as if he fucks camels everyday, I dun see any reason why I should let him have my seat. He seems healthy enough. He is just short. I am short too you know. Its is very disgusting for a GUY to snatch a seat from a lady. Just because he looks bloody handicapped at first sight doesnt mean that he shld be entitled to a seat more than I did. I paid the same amount as he did, plus I am in heels, and he? In comfortable Nikes. I SHOULD SIT COZ THEORTICALLY THE SEAT IS MINE.

I had half a mind to ask him to fuck off from my seat, but I decided against it as I thought that just because he looks handicapped and I look like a slut, people would scold me for scolding someone disabled. I still strongly believe that there is absolutely nothing wrong with his feet, but Singaporeans might be too dumb to think that way. (Why, if his feet hurt, use a wheelchair. Else our government would be spending money on building all those lifts for nothing.)

Just as I finally managed to curb my anger a little. That fucking guy happily announced to his friends that he can sit all the way to tampines. Which means I will not get my seat back. Gosh, I'm so angry.

My point is this: I dun see why we should give in to these "different" people. In the example of the dwarf guy... I get people saying and teasing that I am short all the time. But I believe he doesn't get that kinda jokes, just because it is mean to say that to him. But think about it, can I help being short as much as he does? No. Both of us were just born this way, so why should he get the kindness?

In another example, there was once this advertisement on the mrt, which was drawn by kids with leukemia (or whatever it is supposed to be spelt as), to urge people to donate funds for a society. One of the drawings consisted of a girl wearing a dress, and on her almost bald head was just four strands of hair. The drawing was very bad. Its just plain lines, obviously done by kids who did not put in much efforts anyway.

I took a look at the poster, and lightly mentioned to June that I think that the girl in the drawing is very hideous.

She nodded slightly, and then proceeded to read the text.

And she got really upset and shrieked, "You very bad leh!! She is not ugly la!! She has leukemia thats why she got no hair!! You very bad, how can you say that about her?!"

What? I dun get it. Just because she has leukemia means I cannot say she ugly meh? Then say other people ugly its ok? I dun get the link between blood cancer and aesthetics. You are ugly means you are. I dun see why these people should get spared from the usage treatment people get.

If you saw a celebrity whom you don't like, you start to criticize his looks, ie saying his mouth is too big, nose too flat etc. You deny that he looks good and says that silly teenage girls who go ga-ga over him are crazy.

But what if you saw this same person, not a celebrity, across the streets one day? And you realise he is BLIND. And what do you say about him? Dare you comment anything about his looks?

Weird isn't it? Why can't you comment about his looks? Why just focus on the disability?

On the same basis, you bitch about people being damn stupid to your friends. What if the person has been changed to a kid with down-syndrome? Do you still comment that he is stupid? What the difference here? Are both not born stupid? Can they both help it that they are being dumb?

I say we treat them exactly like normal individuals except to give them an advantage at the areas they are handicapped at. It may seem mean, but thats me. I am mean. Urgh. I am still angry at getting my seat stolen.

Another issue I thought about.

After reading Anne Rice's horny novels, this theory suddenly hit me.

There is no such thing as sexuality. Attraction, is simply about aesthetics.

In other words, people as not attracted to (,if their are straight), the opposite sex simply because it is the opposite sex. People are attracted to beautiful objects. As long as you look beautiful, women and men would be attracted to you alike.

I think its is quite true. Imagine this situation.

Guys: Would you rather have the most beautiful (i say beautiful as in pleasing to the eye, not gay beautiful) man do a blow for you, or would you rather it be the ugliest woman on earth?

Girls: Would you rather kiss Jennifer Love Hewitt or kiss a bangala?

The answer is obvious. Sexuality is all about aesthetics, not gender. Inside, all of us are homosexuals. We might refuse to admit it, because society says we are abnormal if we are attracted to the same gender. I don't know about the way men feel, but I know most females definitely get aroused from watching porn with just females inside.

I think I am really turning bi. Men attract me more though, especially if their name is Jeremy.

p/s: I am still too lazy to get my comments link back, so please do email me if you have any opinions you would like me to know? I would reply if I can. =)

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