2004-06-28

ALL MEN WATCH PORN

ALL. Absolutely all. Except blind men. And they enjoy it, therefore they watch it. If Shaolin monks had Kazaa, they would type in "The Hot Chick" to act as if they are downloading a decent movie, but actually they gei gei click on the "Blonde hot chick get fucked muliple times" movie when you turn your back away from the screen. Ok, maybe the shaolin monks would download Huang Fei Hong - The Movie, first. THEN "THE HOT CHICK".

Digressing a little, let's talk about being fucked by a lot of people at one time. Now, how is that possible?

I once watched this porn flick which is EXTREMELY funny. I must say, the director is very creative.

There was this blonde girl with big tits lying naked on a table, just lying there like a dead fish?

Suddenly, six burly men appeared out of nowhere. They started to strip. And then they started to brush their teeth. Kidding, they didn't brush their teeth.

First guy takes her in her privates.

Second guy takes the mouth.

3rd and 4th guy gets a handjob.

AND THE LAST TWO PUT THEIR DICKS IN BETWEEN HER TOES!!! And can you believe they had to fuck her feet until they cum???


DAMN FUNNY SIA!!! Somemore, the toe-fuckers had to pretend as if it is damn shiok to toe-fuck!! You see their fake expressions, damn funny!! "Woooh, It feels so good, my penis is in between toes!!!"

Imagine this:

Director: "Oei my porn stars!! Come here!"

Male star 1: "What's it this time? Redheads? I love shaved redheads."

Director: "No, it's a blonde with big tits. But something different."

Male Star 2: "Ok, my eight incher is all excited."

Director: "Oh you naughty boy! Here, ballot."

MALE STARS, ALL: "For fuck?"

Director: "Precisely."

Male Star 3: "No, we mean, for what?"

Director: "Oh. Just choose a piece of paper! I'm paying you guys ok!"

Male Star 3: "You want to choose who takes ass again is it? I'll volunteer."

Director: "Stop taking cock. I mean, stop talking. And pick one."

MALE STARS, ALL: *grumble grumble* -takes a piece each-

Male Star 5: "HIYAH! I KANNA THE TOES!!!!!!!!! Don't want lah! Don't like that!!! WHY I SO SUAY ONE??!"

Male Star 6: *faints* -In his balled up hand is a strip of paper that writes "behind ear"-

Director: -nudges the faintee- "Oei! I joking only la!!"


Moving swiftly back to my audacious statement that all men watch porn.

The Dalai Lama possibly imagines himself fucking that jap schoolgirl as ... Dalai Lama. Kinky.

ALL MEN WATCH PORN. Ugly men, fat men, stupid men, presidents, taxi drivers, nasi lemak guy, ah beng, ah beng, Brad Pitt, etc, ALL WATCH PORN. Just like of all them masturbate. Men who say they don't, are liars.

What's there not to like about porn? Even the most "satisfied" man possibly not be able to fulfil all his sexual fantasies. Let's talk about, say, JLo's husband, while we assume that JLo is the sexiest woman alive (she is not, but I say ASSUME).

So, the person fucking JLo would possibly be very happy. She is like, JLO LEH!

But, can JLo be a kinky blonde nurse tomorrow? Will she even swallow? Can she blow well? Possibly can't fulfil all those fantasies So, the next best thing this man can do, is to watch porn.

Which you would realise by now, that watching a blonde nurse swallow would possibly not be as good as fucking JLo in real life.

So that's one major mistake I made. Big deal. So let's assume that this lucky man has JLo fulfilling all his sexual needs (Can you imagine JLo swallowing? I can't. She looks like the kind who will kick your ass if you dare ask her to swallow. Like, "ME, JLO, SWALLOW? WHY, JUST BECAUSE MY NAME RHYMES? NO WAY! I AM JENNY FROM THE BLOCK YOU KNOW!") and he does not desire to watch porn.

But, hand him a video cam and JLo's consent, and you can be sure as hell he would film it down, because IT WAS SO GOOD!

And then, when he watches the video he recorded, AHA THERE YOU HAVE IT! HE'S WATCHING PORN!! So all men watch porn - it's not a fallacy at all.

Stop being politically correct and agree with me, NOW! Even the girls!!

A L L M E N W A T C H P O R N! Except blind men, and those who can't afford it.

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