2005-06-23

Thank you to all my readers, to Shuyin, Wanyi and Wong and Peter and of coz Mommy and everyone who has stood up for me for this terrible ordeal.

Thank you for your kind words and your fighting for the unfairness and injustice done to me.

Even as I write about how terribly my reputation has been tarnished, about how helpless I feel I can hear hate mail ringing in my ears. Imaginary ones that are actually not happening.

I can hear people saying that I deserve this to happen to me because I wrote mean things about SPG first. That I deserve this downfall, that I deserve it coz fame has gotten to my head.

I have never thought of hurting anyone. I only blog out my thoughts. I know they are sometimes mean, but I am just saying my true feelings. I know readers like me to maintain my honesty even though I am so mainstream now, so I try my best to. I really do you know. You people only know how criticise me, to scold me, to say my blog entries are not up to par anymore, and how I am losing my touch, not funny anymore, but do you see the struggle behind everything?

How difficult it is for me to maintain honesty on this very public domain where people are always picking on me, and constantly on the prowl for my weaknesses to attack me?

I can tell you, if I were a less famous blogger, if I had written the exact same entry on SPG it would be funny instead of whatever words you all used to describe it. I wrote it because I know 3 years ago I would have written the same thing, and I wanted to maintain my old style.

Nobody has told me I deserve this deluge of media framing, but I just hear these voices in my head going on and on you know? I cannot stop crying from the helplessness and I think I am just going crazy.

People say such means things you know? You have no idea, you who send me hate mails, how difficult it is to live on when so many people ask you to die. What did I do wrong? Just by saying a pair of tits are not pretty?

Just to show u some:

It irks me, and I daresay half the male population in Singapore, to have
to tell you that you are a nasty bitch for attacking the lady known as
sarongpartygirl.

We may not agree with her philosophy in life, but at least she's honest, and upfront with her views. Plus she does not stoop so low as to deface somebody else's photo, nude or clothed.

You have demeaned yourself, and all Singapore females, for being a foul mouthed and petty toad to be so obviously jealous of someone else stepping into the limelight, whether intended or not. Yes, you claimed no such green eyes, but this time Photoshop will not help you. The words are all there, on your own blog and in the local media, even though you may be blind to the fact because of your pathetic
understanding of the English language. This is where sarongpartygirl shines. She writes, you scribble. And, despite your sick doodling, she has a nice bod, something you'll never understand. Grow up will ya, guys will always prefer real women rather than little girls in pink frocks and heavy make-up (with or without help of Photoshop).

Bleah!!!
--
Wong Jui Meng
braydenwong@fastmail.us


From: Liu Weixian grayfountain@yahoo.com.sg
To: xiaxue@gmail.com
Date: Jun 19, 2005 3:06 PM
Subject: Good Advice

What the Hell is wrong with you?

Why kick up such a big fuss over SPG's blog? It's her blog and it's her goddamn prerogative to write what she wants. And if she posted nude pictures of herself, I say, good for her and better for the guys. Why the stupid comments about her in the New Paper?

If SPG can write so much better than you, there is certainly no need to be jealous. I look at your writing and think it's pretty substandard and a load of crap. Your entries are incoherent and people may think that Singaporeans can't write in proper English when they read your blog. Personally I don't know what are you trying to get at. You shouldn't get upset about the truth my dear.

Anyway, SPG looks prettier than you. I see no wrong why she can't flaunt what she's got. Maybe you should do the same. But then again, maybe not. You got nothing to show off anyway. Don't understand simple English? Take a piss, look into it, and you should get my point.

And lastly, DO NOT presume that the average Singaporean cannot understand what SPG writes in her blog. Many of us are highly educated and your presumptions are most insulting. If you cannot understand her 'chim' English, it could be that you are just stupid.

Lastly, I would advise you to shut up if you have nothing intelligent to say. Your New Paper columns are a waste of ink and space.

Regards,
Mr. Liu



These two are the more coherent of the many. I have so much to argue, to reply, to defend myself, but I have no energy to do that anymore. I feel so misunderstood, I didn't even do what they claimed I did, but why should I bother? People just love hating me.

I was never jealous of her nor have I ever said my writing is better than hers.


Why are people telling me things like, "More people used to love you than hate you now most people just hate you - close down your blog" or "Your friends are all talking bad behind your back" or saying how ugly and stupid I am. Wo ye shi ma ma sheng de, you all like that say me, my mom will be very upset you know? At least think of her feelings can.

You ask me why my entries are no longer funny. Because everytime I write, I hear these voices telling me all these hurtful and malicious words, and these "readers" sneering at me, saying things like "writing like this can be Singapore's best blog ah, siao!"... The elite writers like Nick Liu and Reminisce laughing at my simple English...

I cannot take it anymore. I've developed a phobia for reading my mail, I don't dare to look at the comments links anymore. I don't have to take all these. Please don't fight anymore, please stop saying such mean things, I cannot take it anymore. I am breaking down into a million pieces.

Please.

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