2008-07-12

20 Of My Bestest Purchases!!!

Thanks for the comments. Some may not have been published but rest assured I read them all!

So far, no lawyer's letter from beautiful Dawn, although she did delete the line on her blog that says she accepts my apology. Oh well!

She also added that I upped her hits to 30,000 (I upped mine too! Now 50,000! Who want to advertise??).

Since bloggers earn money based on hits, I guess I didn't cause her any losses but instead gave her some gains then, huh?? So what's there to sue about? LOL!! She ought to be thanking me, really!! -insert xanga heart smiley-

Oh dear Dawn Wayang is down! Wonder why? Anyway, the new site seems to be up here. I do not endorse anything that's written inside, as they are all lies, it seems to me. Lies! Why do you slander Dawn so, Mr Wayang?? You must be just jealous!

Here's a blog entry I wrote halfway a million years ago, to applease you all.


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Sometimes, you buy some non-descript stuff and it turns out to be so absolutely fantastic and so wu chao suo zhi (value for money) that you just wanna rave about it and tell the whole world!!

And these, my lovely blog readers, are the top 20 products!!

Of course, there are the very chio stuff too like $10 dresses and all my Juicy products, but these are products that are useful to everyone! By everyone I mean everyone who has a use for them la. Mostly females. Hahaha!


1) Electric bug-zapper thingy




What it is:
Metal wires have an electrical current running through them after you turn the apparatus on. Holding the handle, smack or swipe the air where the insect you wish to kill is.


Have you ever seen a mosquito that bit you, and as you try to smack it, it flies away, ESCAPING THE HORRIBLE DEATH IT DESERVES???

With the Electronic Bug Zapper Racket, that incident happening to you just reduced like 100%.

This is what happened to me:

- Mozzie bit me.

- I saw it land on the side of my couch.

- Couch is soft and white.

- If I attempt to smack Mozzie it won't die (due to soft surface) and even if it does, couch gets stained.

- Take bug zapper.

- MOZZIE DIES.


The fun doesn't stop with the sadistic pleasure that's associated with bug-killing.

Oh no of course not!

Not only does the mosquito get electrocuted as it flies unwittingly through the racket, it EXPLODES WITH A LOUD POP AND EMITS A BRIGHT BLUE SPARK!!

It's almost like insect fireworks, except much better.

The dead mozzie then floats to the floor, where you can pick it up with a tissue and at the same time, squash it to see how much blood it drew from you.

Loudly, you can ask the mosquito, "IS IT WORTH IT TO DIE LIKE THIS FOR THIS MEASLY AMOUNT OF MY BLOOD, HUH, HUH?!?!?!"

Rhetorical, of course. The mosquito is dead and cannot answer.

I bought this racket since around 1 year ago, and the amount of insects it had helped me kill probably consisted of 10% of the insects in the world.

It also works on:

- Cockroaches (yes it does! Mike killed a baby one just a few weeks ago. As for the adult ones, the racket burns it feelers so it gets disoriented, then you can go ahead and smack it with newspaper.)

- Golden beetles

- Moths (killed after like 7 sparks, one with each of its feeble attempts to escape, until it decides death is better)

- Baby lizards (never tried on bigger ones)

- Flies

- Flying ants

- Humans you don't like

Hiyah it can be used on ANYTHING LAH! And the best part is, the racket doesn't seem to get dirty! I thought with each kill the racket is going to get steadily more and more disgusting, but it seems to look just as pristine as the blessed day I bought it.

Available at: Mustafa and other neighbourhoodish household stores. I even saw pink ones can!? Requires D-sized batteries but can be used for a long time unless you stay at some insect-infested place. $3 or something cheap like that.



2) Guardian Extra-Large Cotton Tips


On the shelf, hidden innocently among it's inferior friends


A comparison to normal-sized Q-tips


What it is: Extra-large wad of cotton on top of a plastic stick. Feel free to use it to dig anything.

I don't know who set the standard size for cotton buds, but it is too fucking small!! Cmon, whose ear crevice is that tiny?

Guardian decided it's time for a revolution!!

When I first saw the XL cotton buds, I wanted to get it coz I use cotton buds to clean my nostrils (since, fragile from the nose job I can't dig them) and the normal buds are simply too small and flimsy!

Then, I put another one into my ear to try.

3 secs later I shouted at Mike, "BABY YOU HAVE TO TRY USING THIS!!!"

It was really fun to watch coz he was groaning and making shiok faces, hahaha!

We never looked back since and now, we scoff at normal-sized cotton buds.

You know what they say... "Once you go black you can't go back"! Same theory.

Available at: Guardian of course. $1.95


3) Illegal extension cord



What it is: A pink and chio extension cord

I bought this at some random neighbourhood appliance shop, so I don't know where you can get it, but it's only 5 bucks!!

And it's transparent pink, and and... it can plug in any sort of plug, including the US ones!!

NO MORE HAVING PROBLEMS WITH THE STUPID 2-PIN PLUGS.

However, I've heard horror stories about the illegal cords exploding and burning down houses before... It seems to work fine for me leh! And it's pink so it's matchy matchy my room! :D

Available at: I really don't know where you can find it, but I bought it along Bedok reservior road.



4) Earring/assorted rubbish holder


Hanging on my wardrobe door

What it is: A little flat baggie with a multitude of transparent compartments that can be used to put whatever you like.

After years and years of searching, I've found the best storage solution for earrings!!

Before this, I put my earrings on those metal rolley things, like this:



Unfortunately, the problem with those things is that it uses to much space to be put into cupboards, and if you leave it on a table it will get very dusty and dirty.

Worst of all, the earrings after a while start to rot because of the humidity in the air!!

Tadah!! Solution!! This way it won't take up much space at all, and you can see all the earrings at one go without having to spin!!

Wait till you hear the price.

Available at: DAISO outlets!! $2 of course!! CHEAP CHEAP!!



5) Bioessense face-lifting cream



What it is: Amazing moisturizer that can make your face slim down.

I don't know if it works for everyone, but this magical cream has a measuring tape inside it to guarantee that your face will lose at least 1 cm after usage!! Amazing not!!

Qihua swears by it.

Only problem is that it is a tad oily. I only use it on the sides of my face when I feel extra fat.

Available at: City Plaza's those rubbish perfume stores you know? $28. At Watsons or Guardian also have... $40 there!



6) Nintendo DS Lite




What it is: Portable game console

Best purchase EVER!!!

So far not a day of my life has been bored since I have my DS Lite to accompany me through queue-waiting, shitting-time, etc!!

I've introduced... 8 people to buy the DS, and everyone loves it!!! (NINTENDO PLEASE REWARD ME DUH!!!)

Besides awesome games like Super Mario/Phoenix Wright (playing Apollo Justice now, for those of you who know. It's awesome!! thanks Timmy!!)/bomberman/Mario kart etc etc etc, the DS can also be used to play songs and videos!

Is it more fun than the PSP? Yes, I'd definitely say so, and everyone who owns both consoles all agree with me.

Comes in a variety of fun colours so there is one for everyone!!

Baby pink (mine, but without crystals of course)
Baby blue
White
Black
Red and Black
Silver
Metallic Rose (like reddish brown colour)
Navy Blue
Yellow (limited edition only avail in Japan's Pokemon centers)

I LOVE MY DS SO MUCH! I never ever leave the house without it.

Available at: Sim Lim, or other electronic stores. Around $310 for everything included - $210 for empty set without R4 card or memory card.




7) Sofy Double Fresh Pantyliner

(Boys please skip to 8, oh wait that's a hair curler...)



What it is: Double layer panty liner!! Rhymes too!

I don't know about girls who don't use panty liners, but girls who do, swear by them. I'm one of them!

What we hate though, is when you had a long day, and you wanna have a change of liners, but didn't bring any.

A genius at Sofy then thought, "Well, since pantyliners are so goddamn cheap, why not stick two layers as one?"

It is an amazing idea!!!

Now, if you feel like the first layer is dirty, just peel it off, and there you go... second layer spanking clean!!

Not only that... if you get your period on the first layer... Don't fret; just peel!

If you go into a coffee shop toilet and there is no toilet paper?

At the very least you have always your top layer of liner to wipe on. :) (OEI! Stop judging me! Better than don't wipe right?!?!?)

Available at: Guardian/Watsons. $3 like that for 52 pieces.




8) Braun hair curler



What it is: A portable hair curler, for curling on-the-go.

Does your curled hair always go limp in the middle of the day? Or are you always late because you are curling your hair before leaving the house?

Now you don't have to be!! Hair curling can now be done on the taxi (or on the MRT/bus if you are more buay paiseh) to save you precious make-up time!

Not only that, if preverts try to molest you you can stuff this hot tong up their asshole!!

Or... You can meet your date on time, then quickly disappear into the toilet for 15 mins and come back out with amazing hair. Isn't it so awesome?!

Comes with safety lid, so after using you can put it straight back into your bag.

Now Braun came up with a straightening iron that's portable too!! I love them all!

Available at: I bought mine at Mustafa. $89 or something...




9) Sally Hansen Hard As Wraps nail polish



What it is: Extra hard nail polish from Sally Hansen

There is no arguing what the best nail polish is. OPI, of course! But OPI only gives very vivid, long-lasting colours... not sure about the strength.

Sally Hansen's HARD AS WRAPS nail polish is damn amazing though!! It is ALMOST like acrylic nails... it is so goddamn hard!!

Nail breakages no more!

Expensive though, but still much cheaper than acrylic.

Available at: Guardian? Watsons? Everywhere also have la... $17 I think.




10) Banana Boat tanning oil in SPF 4



What it is: Your secret to an awesome tan

It's an open secret. Have you been to the beach/pool and seen loads of tanned, golden bodies lazing around?

Beside them is always this little bottle of tanning elixir.

How do I get my tan? Banana boat la!

My favourite activity is to go to my condo's pool with girlfriends (or gay friends) and laze around.

Armed with...



11) Creative Zen Stone Plus



Another good product! Despite the dumb name, this is a totally awesome MP3 player! $99 only!

Pictured here with my $75 Sennheiser baby pink ear phones (zhng-ed with diamantes) which are also super awesome and totally worth its price.



The best thing about it is that it has a really good speaker for such a tiny player. I love to put the speaker to max volume and listen to disgusting Chinese pop songs. I don't care if other pool dwellers (usually none as people got to work) don't like it. They can buy their own Stone Plus if they want!!

Anyway, I don't use earphones at the pool because my hands are all oily!

Batteries last for around 4 hours playing on the speaker, no problem.

Better than iPod coz I don't need to use bloody iTunes to upload songs! (Drag and drop)

So anyway, as I was saying about my favourite activity...

I like to laze beside the pool, half submerged in water, listening to music, and gossiping with girlfriends/Mike.

The sun will be a-shining and I will become steadily more golden... then beside me... a bowl of Nissin XO seafood cup noodles bought and cooked from my condo's convenience store, and a bottle of ice-cold Vanilla coke.

ULTIMATE BLISS MAN!!

Back to banana boat.

Comes in varying tanning n00bness starting from SPF 8 (if I am not wrong.. green cap) to SPF 4, to SPF 0 (red cap) for hardcore tanner!

SPF 0 tends to give me sunburn, so I usually stick to 4, unless T-I-N-S. (Tanning lingo: There Is No Sun)

Is it possible to tan without the oil? No... not for me anyway. I just turn lobster red and peel afterwards. But not with the oil. Turn golden!

Here's a little trick. Instead of spraying onto your body, which in my opinion wastes a lot of the oil, spray into your palms and rub it onto your skin. Remember to reapply every half hour!

Available at: Watsons and Guardian. $11.




12) Nail polish remover bottle




What it is: Bottle for nail polish remover

Self-explanatory. Press down and remover comes up.

Hate that whole process where I open and close the cap of the polish remover while removing nail polish, then finally, spill the whole bottle. Don't laugh! Happened many times! Very smelly and melts plastic lor!!

Available at: Sasa. Around $3??




13) Applicators



What it is: How applicators should all be

Finally! Someone realised that applicators without caps are staining things left right center!

Now you don't have to find a particular applicator for a particular colour. All on one jolly good stick.

Available at: Sasa again. I think its $3.80.





14) Energizer book light



What it is: A portable book light

Got a sleeping someone beside you but you want a book to read before going to bed?

This is perfect!

Also good for scaring your partner by shining under your face, if you want.

Batteries lasted me for half a year and still going strong.

Available at: Giant/Carrefour. $13+ if I'm not wrong.





15) Panasonic Epilator



What it is: A portable epilator! God bless engineers!

Finally! The day has arrived! Epilators are really a god-sent.

For those of you who don't know - epilators pluck out hairs, except it's a many at a time. A spinning mechanism kiaps the hairs as you roll the epilator across your skin. Voila! Hairless armpits! In 2 mins or less!

It sounds painful, but imho, better than plucking right?

What's even better than corded epilators? Cordless ones!

Available at: I don't know. Courts? I forgot the price but it's like $60. Awesome for travelling.




16) Daiso blushers



What it is: Cheapest blushers ever

$2 blushers. Colours look awful here but look good when applied (not heavily la of course).

Light pink on the apples of the cheek, and the dark ones to accentuate cheekbones. I love them!!

Available at: Daiso la! $2 each!




17) Sally Hansen Creme Hair Bleach



What it is: Your solution to an ungainly moustache.

Black eyebrows look DISGUSTING when you have dyed brown/blonde hair.

So dye your brows too!

Why pay so much to dye your brows at Browhaus (whatever that place is called) when you can DIY at home?

Just bleach them until they turn the colour of your hair (range from dark brown to blonde la... obviously not colours like purple/red), and wash off!

Excess can be used to also bleach your moustache, arm hairs, pubes etc if you want. Hahaha!

Available at: Mustafa. $13 or something. Can be used many times, unless you have an extremely thick unibrow...



18) Daiso wire binds



What it is: Binds up ugly wires!

Remember that incident where a dead lizard was trapped in the midst of my computer wires and was radiating the worst smell ever??

From then on I had enough of long wires/cords!! Why the hell do they always have to be so bloody LONG anyway?

Bind up everything with these cute colourful binds, and everything will be much neater and of course, not tangled!

Available at: Daiso. $2! That place is awesome.



19) Set of Harry Potter books



What it is: Best books ever

Ok, I just had to add these in. I love my Harry Potter books and have read each one at least 10 times already. I now read from 1-7, stop for a few weeks, then start from 1 again. It never gets boring!

Everyone should own a set!

Available at: All reputable book stores. Price? You can put a price to the joy Harry Potter books can bring you.

Lastly...




20) OSIM uVibe

What it is: An extra-strong neck massager

I'll let the website explain:





Ahem! It can be used in the following places...



I personally like using it on my sole. Hahaha!!


I'm not sure if this is still available. The last time I checked, back in January mind you (my gf wanted one), the uVibe was sold out throughout Singapore! I didn't know quite so many people had sore necks like me.



Available at: Osim stores. Don't buy from Mustafa as it is $89 there. Normal Osim stores only $69, or something like that.

That's it! Have fun shopping!



p/s: Yesterday I got my third XIAO SAN YUAN!! It was the shiokest game every lor!! First I got 2 of my own flowers.. MONEY!

Then got 1 more animal...

Then I GANG a 7 tong after ponging... MONEY!

Then I pong a hong zhong...

Then I self-GANG a fa cai! MONEY~!!

After I gang the fa cai, I got left 4 cards inside...

1 Bai ban, 2 Yi Tong, and 1 Er Tong

THEN I DREW ANOTHER BAI BAN!! Of course I throw the er tong right?

So wait Bai ban and Yi tong la!!

Then Chups (the guy I was playing with) throw the yi tong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yay!!

Major win a lot of money!!

and let me count... 3 flowers, pong pong, half colour, xiao san yuan... 10 doubles is it??

I know. SOOoooo not interesting for non-mj-ers. Whatever!!! Makes me happy to read it!

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