2012-06-15

The Secret

I've been wanting to blog about this topic for a while now but I haven't because it is truly of such a magnitude that I don't even know where to begin. The second reason is that, well, it's sorta all in a book/movie already so I felt there was no need.

But people still kept requesting for this post so here goes. And this is gonna be a lengthy, wordy post. I assure you though, it is well worth reading. I hope. I actually think all my posts are worth reading so I guess my opinion can't really be trusted, haha.

For all of you who have no idea what "The Secret" is, I shall start by saying it is kinda like a... school of thought popularized by the best selling self-help book "The Secret", written by Rhonda Byrne. She also made it into a movie. As the movie has no plot whatsoever, I don't think it was ever played in Singapore's cinemas so I doubt many Singaporeans have watched it. I personally find the book better anyway!

Let's start from the beginning... I was watching Entourage with Mike and suddenly the characters mentioned "The Secret". I asked Mike "What are they talking about? What Secret?"

And would you have it? Mike had The Secret's movie's dvd somewhere and we finished that episode of Entourage and watched it.

And as I watched, light switches kept flicking on in my head. It was the closest thing to an epiphany I've ever felt. Within an hour, my entire outlook in life changed.

As I said I cannot explain The Secret as well as the book did... Plus the book is so chockful of information... but I will try.


Basically:

- Thoughts become things... Whatever you dwell on will manifest into real life events, be it good or bad.

- Law of attraction states that when you think of good things, good things come to you. Dwell on the bad, depressing or keep giving out negative energy, bad things will happen to you.

Ok it sounds like some enlightenment scripture crap so far but here's the awesome part...

- You can attract into your life EVERYTHING you have dreamed of if you use The Secret, and use it well.

You can have money, looks, love, career, health - ANYTHING.

You can even wish for a harem or a spaceship. The secret isn't like religion, it doesn't judge. It doesn't care about whether you are a good person or a paedophile. You just need to follow the instructions.

And what are the instructions?

You start by asking.

You ask the universe for what you want, and it will find a way to deliver it to you. You don't have to figure out how to achieve it, the universe will just GUIDE you there.

Don't believe it? When Walt Disney first put pencil to paper and drew a mouse, do you think he ever envisioned or planned the route to movie empires or giant theme parks? No, he had a dream, and the universe made it happen for him.

After asking you virtualize, try to imagine yourself already obtaining your wish. Never ever do "negative" wishes ie "I don't want to be poor" because if you keep thinking you are poor, you will constantly be.

Change it to "I want to be rich!". So no "I wish my mom will stop yelling at me." Say instead "My mom and I get along so well and for that I am thankful!"

Other than making your wishes here's the hardest bit - ALWAYS HAVE GOOD EMOTIONS.

The book says that there are only 2 kinds of emotions - GOOD AND BAD.

Good is when you are happy, inspired, contented, hopeful etc... And the bad... Depression, disappointment, anger, jealousy, dejected etc.

How your mood constantly is will generate MORE of that sort of mood for you.

Do you want to constantly be depressed? If no, snap out of sadness asap.

You can use tools to help you, such as remembering a super funny event or thinking of your cute pet or listening to your favourite song. Whatever helps! I like to virtualise Igloo's fuzzy head and his ears flopping when he runs, it's hilarious.

I find this part the hardest because it isn't easy to get rid of anger for me. I don't really get sad anymore, but I do get mad easily. And I know that the little spurts of anger I have will accumulate and create some nasty occurrence in my life. :[

Another emotion that is hard to get rid of is doubt. The moment you dream about something, a logical person will think "But how is that possible? Zac Efron will never fall in love with me..." Well, if you say so (or rather, think so), the universe delivers.

So see? It is not 100% foolproof. You can control your fate, but unless you somehow master your brain and emotions, you cannot control it 100%.

But if you didn't know about the Secret, at least you are now aware that you can change if not everything then a huge part of your life!!

What you have in your life right now is entirely your own doing. Are you a happy person and lucky things keep happening to you? Or are you a Negative Nelly and shit keeps happening to you? It isn't a coincidence - it is cause and effect and it's a cycle. Snap out of a vicious one!


One emotion that the Secret says you should always have is Gratitude. 

In fact, Byrne wrote 3 books, The Secret, The Power, and The Magic. The Magic is entirely on just gratitude itself.

The book states that whatever you are grateful for, you will get more of. Whatever you take for granted, whatever little you have will be taken away from you.

Ok enough lifting material from the books... Please go buy them yourselves.



Now that you know the rough contents, I will talk about how The Secret affected me!

When I was reading the book I read a paragraph that says something like... If you master The Secret, you will lead the sort of life that everyone will be envious of and amazed by.

I reflected upon my life and I thought... I already sorta have that, don't I?? Every other day someone tells me they wish they are me or have my job/hair/weight etc. And how is this possible when I didn't know The Secret before?

The fact is, I already discovered it when I was 14. Well actually, just a tiny, tiny part of it. And even so, it has already made my life so awesome.

When I was 14 my friend Eileen was a fan of Scott Adams, the creator of Dilbert comics. She lent me a book he wrote and there was a small chapter called "Affirmations".

Adams believed that if you wrote something down on paper everyday for 10 times a day, it will come true. He said you didn't even have to believe this works... Just do it. Be as skeptical as you want. Make a wish, form it into a sentence and make it specific. Write x 10, everyday.

I will meet JK Rowling in person by end 2013.
I will meet JK Rowling in person by end 2013.
I will meet JK Rowling in person by end 2013.
I will meet JK Rowling in person by end 2013.
I will meet JK Rowling in person by end 2013.
I will meet JK Rowling in person by end 2013.
I will meet JK Rowling in person by end 2013.
I will meet JK Rowling in person by end 2013.
I will meet JK Rowling in person by end 2013.
I will meet JK Rowling in person by end 2013.

Ok I cheated and copy and pasted but you get the gist. Write it on paper!

He was just another engineer when he started this practice, he said. It always worked for him. He started sending comics to newspapers and he wished for them to publish him and they did. Then one day he wrote "I will be the top author in the world" or something to the like... Just something extremely lofty to see if it will happen. That week his book was first on New York Times Bestseller, so for just a week, it came true.

I read that chapter full of disbelief... How can it be? But I took his advice and I tried. For every other time I wanted something extremely badly in my life, I did this exact thing.

And I didn't even realise that my success rate was really high, like almost 98%.

Now you say... If you did this since you were 14, why are you not a billionaire by now and dating Zac Efron?  Well, firstly, I didn't often use Affirmations. I believed in it, but not 100% percent.

Secondly, and this is a pity because The Secret didn't exist back then... I sometimes wished for negative things. For bad things NOT to happen. No wonder they did. -_-

And thirdly, I was CONTENTED. Believe it or not when left to their own devices most people don't dream of becoming billionaires... Most of us just want to solve a problem that is in front of us right now like acing an exam, getting chosen for a dream job or that our crush will like us back. Sure I'll love to be a billionaire, but it wasn't high priority enough for me to write down affirmations for it. Nor did I really believe I can become a billionaire. I've always had enough money to use, and I don't spend much. :X Perhaps this is a bad thing, so let me write down the billionaire bit now. (Shall change to millionaire, good enough)

I will have 1 million SGD in my bank by 2013.
I will have 1 million SGD in my bank by 2013.
I will have 1 million SGD in my bank by 2013.
I will have 1 million SGD in my bank by 2013.
I will have 1 million SGD in my bank by 2013.
I will have 1 million SGD in my bank by 2013.
I will have 1 million SGD in my bank by 2013.
I will have 1 million SGD in my bank by 2013.
I will have 1 million SGD in my bank by 2013.
I will have 1 million SGD in my bank by 2013.

So as I was saying... A startling success rate of 98%. Some of the things I've wished for and came true:

- Winning in the Nuffnang Blog Awards for both years, as a bonus I didn't even wish for Region's best Blog and got them.

- Chosen to visit Pixar with only 15 superbloggers chosen worldwide. As a bonus met Michelle Phan and starred in a video with her that was the top worldwide viewed video for a day.

- That Dawn won't sue me and I will find her dirty secrets. ;)



This one comes with evidence. When I went to Kukup a group of my friends and I wrote down a bunch of our wishes on a floating lantern. The giantass "International Fame" bit is written by me (lol I monopolized the lantern).

Honestly, I wished for it like just a BIT, sorta as a joke. My biggest wish back then was actually for Mike and I to have a smooth transaction for our house with our housing loan. You can spy there that I drew a house and to have a baby afterwards. :X Actually now I'm pushing the baby plans back coz I wanna enjoy my renovation. ANYWAY.

A few weeks later PETER COFFIN HAPPENED!! Did I plan it or think it will give me international fame? Absolutely not. Suddenly my blog hits became 400,000 a day wtf. I was on Reddit, gawker, the daily what and so many other USA news sites... I was even featured on my second youtube video that hit the millions in views! (First being Michelle Phan's)

All this just because I wrote ONE sentence down on a paper lantern. Of course, the fame didn't last, but I didn't specify! I actually added a lot of US readers to my site afterwards though. Hi y'all! :D

I went to Kukup with my secondary school friends Ripple and Eekean. Ripple wanted a baby (you can see what she wrote there), and guess what? By the time she was in Kukup she was ALREADY pregnant, except it was very early and she didn't know yet. Now she cannot be happier because baby Miley is such a bundle of joy!! Eekean also got exactly what she wished for!

It's AMAZING.

There are many other examples of my affirmations that worked and Audrey talks about one of them here on her blog.

The only times I can recall that it didn't work... One was for Pumpkin. Didn't manage to make her pee/poop in the right places and she just didn't work out for me. Another was a script I worked on with Gillian... We wanted to get a grant to produce it but it didn't happen. What exactly went wrong those two times I cannot say. Perhaps I was wishing in the negative, or having too much worry and doubt? Who knows?

But guess what? I never actually wanted a dog. This is true... I've always wanted a bunny. I think that they are the cutest creatures ever.

The only reason why I didn't get one and got a dog instead because I thought that bunnies have to be contained in cages, and that didn't seem fun. I wanted my dog to be tiny, quiet, clean, and lazy like a bunny. I was forcing a square peg into a round hole. And now, I have Igloo, whom I love with ALL my heart. I literally have NOTHING to complain about him. Completely fussfree, he loves me, and I wake up everyday very happy just because I can see him and his fuzzy cheeks. He fills me with such good emotions and so much love. My affirmation just took a cb long time to come true, that's all.

As for the movie script, Gillian is thinking of applying again. Who knows, we might get it this time!

So yes since I was young I've used affirmations. I never bothered to control my negative feelings or particularly tried to feel gratitude because I didn't know I should, but I guess I was lucky because I placate my anger very easily whenever I rant/complain. I never ever stay angry or upset for long.

And I was taught from a young age that nobody owes you ANYTHING, even your parents. Nobody is obligated to be kind or nice to you, no matter how tragic your life is. And with that attitude, I am always grateful for all the good or kindness that people have shown me.

Now that I'm looking back, the universe has given me almost everything I've ever wanted. I never particularly wanted to be a blogger. I never really had a "dream job". I thought of being an air stewardess coz I wanted to be paid to fly. I liked the idea of hanging around with other pretty girls. I didn't grow tall enough to be an air stewardess though.

If you asked me back when I was about 18 and people were deciding what they wanted to do with life, I thought of being a writer. I liked writing but being a journalist and writing about others didn't particularly interest me.

I liked art but drawing objects or designing graphics wasn't self centered enough.

I wanted fame and attention, loads and loads of attention, and I love being at the top. Best if it's well-paying and gives me free stuff.

The universe created exactly a job for me that lets me write... About myself, no less. Lets me create art via photoshop... With my face, no less. Gives me shitloads of attention, fame, sponsorships... I get paid to fly to places and I hang out with my fellow pretty blogger girlfriends. And I am the top blogger in Asia Pacific, at least until 2013 according to the Nuffnang Blog Awards. I even get haters because the universe knows I like debating and insulting people.

My dream job didn't exist until the universe created it exactly for me. I must be special. :D

And would you believe it? Because of this blog, everything else worked out for me... Everything I asked on this blog is like an affirmation, and I get it... Be it sponsorships or asking for readers to vote for me etc. And everytime I blog about how happy I am about the results of my wishes coming true, I am actually writing and practicing gratitude. What about the times I complained? Well, I usually get more of those problems coming in. -_- Subconsciously, I was practicing The Secret!!

People also keep telling me I look more and more like my photoshopped self. Is it a coincidence, or is it because everytime I photoshop my picture it akin to me writing 10x that I want to look exactly like that? Food for thought, huh?

I look at my photos and I really think that I keep getting prettier and prettier as I get older. Most people peak at their early twenties but I just keep improving! I'm 28 now and I'm the best I've ever looked. And circumstances keep coming in to aid me in my quest to look better, such as getting plastic surgery or beauty products sponsored. How is this possible? It is because I loved how I looked (gratitude), and yet I am obsessed about getting better!

And not to mention the other awesome aspects of my life as such my loving marriage, my health, weight, income, career, relationships. Everyone around me are seemingly conspiring to make my life wonderful. I get shown so, so, so much love. Who gets random strangers just stopping them everytime they go out to tell them how awesome/pretty they are? I DO. Really... My life... So unbelievably blessed!

ALL THESE BECAUSE I'VE ALWAYS PRACTICED THE SECRET!!


Ok will stop talking about my life Pre-Secret and talk about it Post-Secret now.

After watching the Secret movie I was so inspired I went to organise a gathering where I made all my friends watch it. I wanted their lives to improve and I believed that if I surrounded my life with positive people, my life will improve too. Even before the Secret I already do not EVER hang out with negative people, but more is always better right? LOL

Some of my friends who are bloggers and have open lives, like Cheese and Qiuqiu, you have already seen drastic improvements in their lives. Here's their blog posts on it - Cheesie's (I love this post so much)/Qiuqiu blogged like a zillion posts on it I think this is the earliest. KIASU PLEASE.

If you would believe it, Cheesie met her boyfriend after a chain of unsuitable dudes she was dating, and now he proposed. He is Japanese too so this will allow her to keep going to Japan, the country she loves!! And she met all these famous Japanese celebrities wtf I'm a bit jealous. I ALSO WANT!!

As for Qiuqiu she really wanted her bf to propose and he finally did, with a freaking 1.03 carat diamond ring!! She is really damn good at using the Secret coz she is also very naive and is less logical and cynical than the usual human being. LOL

Etc etc good stuff all happened to my friends' lives. I like to believe I helped a little by introducing the Secret to them :D

As for me... Well I encountered a bit of a hiccup with The Secret.

After watching the movie I was super starry-eyed and believed I could take on the world. At that point I was obsessed over my renovations (I still am) and the first thing I used the Secret to wish for was sponsorship by an electronics brand.

I even created a vision board. Because I believed in the movie so much, I had no doubt at all that I will get it. But I didn't.

I was devastated and dismissed The Secret as bullcrap. Well not completely, but I definitely didn't believe it in so much anymore.

There were questions about the Secret anyway... Why did I not get my sponsorship? I was keeping good emotions, I visualized... and all the works. Or... How can the Secret control your world when the world belongs to so many others? Like for example, only 1 person can be president of USA at any given point, so who gets it? The person who is the most happy/obsessive over it? If it's a competition then surely I don't control my own universe anymore, right? Someone also asked me on formspring why his girlfriend left him when he loved her very much, treasured her, and believed they will be together forever. To all these I have no answers. We can always make excuses, but they all sound very flimsy. Maybe Rhonda Byrnes will reply me.

But I thought about this sponsorship for a long time. And I think I know why I didn't get it. Firstly, Mike didn't want this sponsorship, because it contradicts something else he likes. Of course if it's free he didn't oppose to it, but for the longest time he and I have talked about our dream xxx electronic product (sorry can't say which) and said we wanted it a certain way when we get our new house. Then I changed my mind and wanted another brand. So there was that - deep down I knew I was making my husband kinda unhappy.

THEN... Guess what? I got offered a sponsorship for the dream xxx electronic product that we discussed. The universe gave me exactly what I wanted but I changed my mind already. :X

Secondly...  I wasn't practicing gratitude. This bit is a bit more difficult to understand. You cannot wish for something and be angry or pissed off or feel shortchanged when it doesn't come. Don't. That's the wrong attitude to have.

The right attitude should be like this: "Even if I don't get it, I am ok because I have xxx and xxx and all these other things I am so thankful for. But I hope I get it!!"

And thus look at my glorious list of sponsors for my renovations!! So many people are working together to get my dream house for me. :') So far so many of the sponsors I've gotten products or services from are so freaking awesome I cannot even begin. And I am so thankful.

Oh and I wished for more fame... I've been on so many newspapers and talkshows lately!!

There are many many little things that all came true too, but I really cannot list every one coz it's too many. Just for example, one day I was eating nasi padang and their curry chicken sucked + I wanted a fried egg but they ran out.

I was just thinking I would like some nice curry chicken and that night, Ming's family cooked some and he sent some over to my house when he was sending his friends home. It even included a fried egg and the meal was so yummy!!

I was thinking I'd like some new dollywinks and honeycolor.com, without my asking, sent a huge box over the very next day. I ran out of lycee eyedrops just yesterday and wished to buy some. Before I could get to a shop Kaykay gave me a bottle. I no longer encounter rude cab drivers, can you believe it? I only get very polite ones who all somehow know exactly where they are going. I even get cabs easier nowadays wtf.

Oh yes!! Yutaki and I were just saying how we wish that there will be a semi pro camera that has a flip out screen so we can camwhore easily, and Sony came out with one!!!


I WANT IT!!! Can Sony please sponsor Yutaki and me for a review, thank you!! But if no sponsor also never mind, I still have my trusty Lumix GF3 sponsored kindly to me and it has taken for me so many awesome pictures too!! :D :D

I am glad I read The Magic, because gratitude is a huge part of how the Secret works.

They say to start everyday by saying your thanks. But usually when I wake up I need to rush somewhere so I do my gratitude during cab rides.

I start thinking about all the awesome people in my life and I'm either smiling like an idiot on the cab or full out crying. I haven't cried out of sadness for a long time now, I'm always crying because I am too touched!! Isn't that crazy? And continuously magical things keep happening to make me cry more!!!

Just today I cried again because my new hair sponsor, Next Salon at Ion, made my freaking hair so beautiful. You know how in Extreme Makeover the people unwrap their bandage and start crying? For the first time in my life I experienced that because my hair was so gorgeous and it was freaking baby pink like I've always wanted!!





And my colourist Olivia worked SIX freaking hours on my hair to make this happen for me. Still bothered tonging so beautifully... How to not be touched?!?!?!?

Perhaps The Secret is just a self fulfilling prophecy... Obviously positive thinking works because logically if you believe you can't achieve something, you will never try, and obviously you will fail.

But I guess I choose to believe it and practice it. At the end of the day, what do I stand to lose? I am happier and more positive everyday. I now yearn to do nice things for everyone I love because I get such a crazy sense of satisfaction from it. I now believe that every "failure" I encounter simply means the Secret has not fulfilled it for me yet. Some things take time - have faith!!

This doesn't mean I will stop calling out bullshit when I see it though. Like I said, when I feel angry in order for me to feel better I have to rant!

Which brings me to something I've been wanting to say to my fellow Singaporeans for a long time now. Ranting is fine occasionally, for things that happened to you that SHOULDN'T. Like being called a prostitute.

But more and more I see that Singaporeans are having attitudes that go from bad to worse. Everyday people are whining about the MRT, about the government, about how they should be somehow entitled to all sorts of privileges in life but didn't get it.

You are entitled to nothing. Try staying in war ravaged famine-stricken country and let's hear you whine about your train being delayed for 2 minutes while some asshole with aids is raping your ass.

Don't you know that the more you whine about something the more it will happen? 

Next time you feel angry at the Government, just think about all that Chiam See Tong has done for Singaporeans and feel GRATITUDE instead. Next time the MRT pisses you off, dream of earning so much you can buy a car or get chauffeured. It isn't impossible unless you say it is.

This spirit of negativity in Singaporeans is affecting the whole country. It spreads, making every one of us believe it is hard to own property here, it is tough to live here. It isn't. In fact, it is EASY.  

All you have to do is to change your attitude and believe!!

REPEAT AFTER ME:

I HAVE MORE THAN ENOUGH MONEY. MONEY COMES BY EASILY AND FREQUENTLY. THANK YOU FOR ALL THE MONEY I HAVE BEEN GIVEN IN MY LIFE.


Don't say you cannot because you are not educated enough. Don't say you cannot because you are in a dead end job. Because...

"Whether you say you can't or you can, you're right" ~ Walt Disney

"The most common road to mediocrity is being realistic." ~ Will Smith

I came from a poor family and I only have a poly diploma. I'm still living my dream and getting paid well. How many success stories come from people who have NOTHING? Why not you?

It makes me so mad to keep reading how people are being so totally ungrateful to everything Singapore and life has given them. If you lack gratitude, then don't blame the universe for making your life even more miserable.

Take Alex Ong for example, making all sorts of excuses about life shortchanging him as a reason for shoving an old lady off the bus.

"I'm a product of a society that has abused me, neglected me, and ultimately, misunderstood me.

I do not have an easy life. Money is hard to come by. My parents are separated. I only have three credits in 'O' levels. Jobs I like are near-impossible to come by.

When your life dreams are taken away right in front of you, by people who are supposed to help you, with the help of people who are determined to make your life miserable, the amount of rage that builds up inside you can only be immense."

What a load of bullcrap. This is a perfect example of how someone with a shitty self-entitled UNGRATEFUL attitude will not only continue to lead a shitty life, it will get WORSE. At his young age he has gone viral as a person who might turn violent at any time.

Alex thinks that he doesn't have a easy life and he cannot find a job? SURE, THE UNIVERSE SAYS YOUR WISH IS MY COMMAND. Now that bosses everywhere know he has all these issues, will they hire him? He just predicted and proceeded to seal his own fate!

How did we become a nation of defeatist, self entitled, ungrateful and negative people?

Even as I shared the Secret on formspring or twitter, people were asking me questions like "Can I write 5 affirmations a day instead of 10? 10 is so many, must write for so long."

I'm about to burst a blood vessel. What sort of shit attitude is this? You don't have to write 10 affirmations... In fact, you don't have to write ANY at all. If you want to be lazy, then just don't tell me you want something badly, because you clearly don't give a fuck about it. If you want to show the Universe you only want something 5/10, then the universe will reduce your chances of getting it by 50%. Simple, right?


Thus I am writing this to share with everyone. Pick up the book perhaps, or watch the movie.

Start today by being grateful, being positive, coming out with a list of everything you ever desired and ask for it!! You will definitely see a difference in your life. 

Good luck!!

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