I just found a blog entry I wrote on my clie some time ago which I had forgotten about. Upon reading it again, I believe this entry will offend a lot of people, because it is about something very sensitive, which is... race. However, as usual, I am going straight ahead with it. Please do not scold me or something, coz remember I am merely a 19 yr old poly student. My knowledge of the world outside is limited, and if I am wrong, correct me. There is no need for insults. If you disagree and you think u are justified, state your reasons too.
The following chunk is merely what I felt that day. I could be wrong, of course.
*****
Watching ARE YOU HOT? yesterday really almost made me puke blood.
Alright, for those of you who don't know what the show is about, it is a competition to find out the hottest person in the whole of US; hottest meaning the sexiest.
It is sodding obvious that the judges are trying their best to be racially careful. There was this Afro American girl who got a full ten marks for her face. It is ridiculous. Her nose is too big, her face is not defined enough, and her lips are too thick.
I got hopping mad and Eileen said that although she is not worthy of a ten, she is pretty enough for a black.
Well, thats total bullshit.
I mean, its a fair competition isn't it? So what if most blacks have thick lips? Thicks lips are not supposed to be considered to be an aesthetic thing, so too bad. Is it fair that a white gets penalised for having thick lips but a black doesn't, just because most of their race looks like that? It is totally unfair to the whites. Well, i see the whites getting penalised for having freckles. And blacks dont get freckles. Why not excuse the whites for having freckles, coz most of their race have it?
Nowadays the racist thingy gets so sensitive, and everyone gets so afraid of being labelled as a racist, that things are going the opposite direction, no?
Another example is this ah beng looking chinese contestant. He has single eyelids and slanty eyes. The judges claimed that his eyes are beautiful. HELLO?! Sascasm? Come on, the stage is full of angmohs with deep set blue eyes framed with thick eyelashes and the judges claim a chinese man's eyes are sexy? Please, there is no need to tell so hard to tell people u are racially harmonious. In my opinions, it only makes things worse by bringing the racist issue to light.
The judges are so full of bullshit. Directly after the full-marks-face black girl was this white girl. Now, the first girl is FAT. They claimed that her body is curvacous and sexy. As for the white girl, one of the judges says she has fat thighs when obviously her thighs were like 50% thinner than the first girl. Yet another attempt to tell the world how racially harmonious America is. Why isn't the black girl criticised for having thunderthighs like the white?
And then there are these "punk" like contestants (afro americans) who managed to get into the semi finals while acting hip hop or something.
One of these fellas i saw, has an afro hairstyle, a mediocre face, is too fucking fat, and has a very loud voice. Hello??? Who let that fatso in? Were the people judging the auditions blind? Too bad man, this is a totally superficial compeition based on looks. He may be smart, he may be kind, but he is definitely in the wrong competition.
The judges claimed he had the X factor. X factor my foot. If he was that hot, I would like to see Rachel (the supermodel judge) fuck him right now. I bet she wouldn't do it, coz he is far from hot and nearer to grosteque. All the hip hop and snide answers only make him even more childish and less sexually desirable.
On the other hand, i don't see any whites passing the test if they were anywhere near fat. Oh no! They have higher criteria to meet, coz they are whites! Its disgusting.
I drew a comic.
I bet my Rolex that the winner would be one black, and one white. If the afro american won because he/she is sexy enough, of course it is fair. I have seen some of them who look really good. However, i think its really unfair if the afro american won just because of the silly race issue. I'm sure he/she would not like to win a contest by this method too.
To me, if a white is really sexiest, then why should he/she not win? It is supposed to be a fair competition isn't it? If there is such an arrangement, why not have separate competitions for all the races?
Don't even get started on the "calling blacks blacks is racist thing". I am not racist. I do not know any blacks myself and there is no reason for me to look down on them or anything like that.
I know I should have used the term afro americans but i'm blogging this on my clie so its too troublesomely long. Anyway, if we can call caucasians whites, why can't we call Afro Americans Blacks? It is merely a term and whatever connotations you have about the term which is derogatory is purely ur own and not mine. So if you think i am racist, actually u are the racist one. Think about it, isn't it possible that in my dictionary Blacks=smart friendly people who can dance very well? Whats so racist about the term blacks? Black is a nice colour.
-It is the extreme anti-racists that are causing all the discomfort.-
*****
Upon reading about the issue again, I really think that people should stop being so sensitive and serious about the racist issue. Remember when we were all kids and every race went to kindergarden together? I remember we (chinese and malays kids) used to tease the Indians for having the smell of the oil they use. And then the Malay and Indian kids would say that the Chinese kids are not opening their eyes coz Chinese usually have small eyes?
Did anyone take offence? Were all the kids racist? In the end, didn't everyone play together anyway? All these are merely differences of each race, and a bit of teasing will not hurt anyone. Whats with all the sensitivity anyway? Truly harmonious people will not take offence so easily.
I remember I was talking to this Indian friend of mine, and she told me that the greatest insult will be when, for example, an Indian joins a group of Chinese friends and they tell him that he is totally like them, and they like him just as they would like a Chinese, because this means that the Chinese are not accepting the Indian as what he is uniquely as a person of a different race, but instead comparing him to a Chinese and thinking that he is as good as a Chinese.
Alright, actually it does not make sense, but hey, I'm tired.
Whatever it is, fucking serious people still exist, and because they cannot take a joke, they make the world a miserable place. Please dig up my archives to read what I think should be done to serious people.
Just finished clubbing at a Heineken event at Velvet... Was great fun... Am very tired now so shall blog tml...
Anyway, I was just randoming reading through August's entries and I was like,
"Oh Jeremy jeremy jeremy... Oh jeremy..."
And then I proceeded to drool at his picture for about 2 hours before Cloudy (my maltese) hiccupped in his sleep and woke me up.
Help! I'm still in a daze of infatuation....
Oh, jeremy jeremy jeremy....
Fuck it, I will never get over that guy. I can imagine myself sobbing and sobbing non-stop at his wedding, together with a few other girls, one of which has a pimple on her nose which has never left her nose for the past 2 years. My sharks' fin will overflow with mucus and tears. My suckling pig will drown. I will flood the banquet room and the flowers will all wither and die.
Jeremy will be very angry with me for acting like his wedding is a funeral. He will never speak to me again. I will realise that I can never have sex with him as he is becoming a married man and I will slit my wrist and smear the blood over the bride's face and she will be so horrified and hate Jeremy for spoiling the most important day in her life, thus she pours the Moet and Chandon over Jeremy's cute hair and leaves in a huff to marry a fat dying old man who can give her more money.
Jeremy will slit his wrist too coz I kicked his shin as well and broke his kneecap and he can never play soccer again. Jeremy's blood will spurt across the room in all directions, staining the beautiful white decorations and making the guests all very unhappy that their clothes are ruined. Jeremy's blood mixes with my river of tears and some little kids who cannot swim drown. Men everywhere suddenly understand how it is like to have menses.
Meanwhile Jeremy's sister prances around showing everyone the latest beauty contest trophy she won (the 2,383th), but nobody cares coz everybody is busy looking at me coz I am taking a banquet knife now to cut out my heart, which (not-surprisingly) has broken into a million pieces. My placenta falls out as well. The sister is very angry and kicks Jeremy's other shin, so now he cannot even play one-leg soccer. Jeremy howls in horror and accidentally falls face down into the hot shark fin's soup. He is traumatized coz his hair is now messy. However, he takes out a box of Listerine PocketPak and asks everyone if they want any, anyway. I continue to sob, finally drowning everyone, and floating amongst the corpses is a few pieces KitKat White, which is Jeremy's favourtie chocolate and my supposed wedding gift for him.
Oh, the sorrow... Oh, jeremy, jeremy, jeremy....
Why thou art runneth thy deny love by and sworn by thee art thou Romeo? (By the way, that has no meaning whatsoever except to sound Shakespeare-ish.)
Oh, I am talking nonsense again. Someone slap me.
You know you have reached the epitome of narcissism (if there is such a word) when u do something like what I have decided to do.
I will... Print a tshirt... which has a picture of me, wearing a tshirt, which has a picture of me, wearing a tshirt, which has a picture of me, wearing a tshirt, which has a picture of me.
Still don't understand?
Here you go:
Tadah! Is it brilliant, or brilliant?
I'm off to printing it now. Anyone who thinks this is a perfect idea can ask me to do the photoshopping for your pic at a reduced price of $5. While stocks last only! Limited offer this christmas! LOL!
Got this off Firecow's website... Interesting, have a read...
LOL... Looking for virgins?? *Waves hands madly around* ME me me me me me me!!!!! Me virgin!
Who, for a moment, believed that? Haha!
Mr Jackie Cheng, once he starts having sex at the age of 34, would slap himself for missing out all the sex in his life for the past 14 years or so. But I bet he has a very small penis and until the girl is bound to him for life (aka marriage), he would not risk losing the relationship by showing her his inferior member.
I wanna join the Virgin Day thingy. Just to see how they check whether I am one. But on second thoughts... It would be full of ugly people, so no.
Says Mrs Koh-Hoe, 29: 'Our message is this: If I have pre-marital sex, I am not a person of good character. In fact, any sex outside of marriage is immoral whatever the age of the person.'
Siao, how is premarital sex affecting good character? What she said is flawed and totally unfounded. And where is the immorality?
I am pro pre-marital sex.
Several reasons.
1) Before u marry a person, you have to see if the fella fulfilled several criteria. For example, if you cannot accept smokers, you have to know whether your partner is a smoker before marrying the person. It is the same for sex. What if both partners have very different sex tastes, like one likes SM and the other loves slow romantic sex with candles, but not dripped on the body?
Do they change for one another? And if both refuse to change? Do they find others for sexual pleasures? I say, have pre-marital sex first.
2) You don't wanna be shocked to death when, after marriage, you realise that ur partner has ass hair or something which is totally grosteque.
If you argue that no premarital sex doesn't mean no petting, well, whats the difference between heavy petting and sex? Not much. I say, have pre-marital sex.
3) More practice = you can give the best to your future partner.
4) Are u willing to die not knowing how much better sex can get if you do it with another person? (presuming that there are no extra-marital affairs after marriage)
Premarital sex will make the world a better place.
-Only ugly people say they disapprove of pre-marital sex.-
When I took Media Law in school, I was told by my lecturer that the Media is a very powerful tool, thus, in many countries there are many strict laws protecting who owns the media. For example, the chairperson of say, Mediaworks, cannot be a foreigner.
Ah, a few days ago I just realised the power of propaganda.
I have just ruined someone's life.
Everyone remember Kaiwei?
Well, I think half of Singapore's teenage/young adult population have read my blog at least once. I have reason to believe that because everytime I talk bad about someone, the person seems to be able to read it 1 day after I wrote the entry. For example, the Herpes entry a few days ago was read by the gf of the guy I wrote it to. Doesn't matter though, coz I was only joking anyway.
And then Kaiwei called from the US to tell me that Weihui read my blog.
Well.
I have no idea what is going on, but I think Weihui threatened a break up? Or maybe not.
1 hour later Kaiwei called me again to say that his whole camp knows by now coz some campmate read the blog. One single day before all life-forms associated with Kaiwei reads my blog. The campmate told him, "Bak, you are so dead."
"Oh, so does he find it nice?", I asked Kaiwei. He didn't think it is funny.
Well, of course not.
But let me jump to my own defence before everyone starts to blame me for breaking them up, if they do break up, which I think they wouldn't.
1) It is good that Weihui (AND I) found out early.
2) If their relationship cannot withstand a silly hiccup like this, it is not my fucking problem. Too bad, I thought a 3 year relationship would have been stronger huh?
3) Whatever I wrote was the absolute truth.
4) The entry wasn't meant to be for Weihui to read. If you think that she should not have known, well, blame that friend of hers who told her to read my blog.
5) Hello, did anyone consider that I am the victim here too?
6) Why can't I write about my life in my blog? Kaiwei is just plain unlucky that he has dated an internet bitch from hell. Should I have been a normal stupid girl, none of these would have happened. But no. I was just smart enough to think that he could be lying and smart enough to spend some effort to check. And I happen to have a blog which gets 500 readers a day.
7) He should not have been lying in the first place.
*****
Well, here are some words I would like to tell Weihui:
First off, Kaiwei did not really "betray" you coz he and I did not do anything at all. He merely said he is single. Well, I think most guys do that all the time, moreover, you are in the US, so stuff like this would happen I guess. But the fellow seems to be very smitten by you anyway, so a dumb thing like this should not upset the relationship too much, else it is difficult to find guys who are smitten nowadays.
Don't get angry. Get even.
Fuck a Caucasian today.
If you choose to leave him (most likely this whole issue is merely an excuse?), welcome to singlehood! *embrace* No more hurt, no more confusion, and FREEDOM to choose all over again. Ain't life great?
*****
Kaiwei told me I ruined everything for him.
Well my dear. I didn't. You ruined everything yourself. If you didn't lie, nothing would have happened.
And by the way. Weihui is not everything. Your still have your family, your friends and your other possessions, no? Come on, its just a girl. Brace yourself and stop behaving like some spineless sea urchin.
Kaiwei said that he regrets knowing me.
The feeling is mutual.
Kaiwei said he would not contact me again.
What about the Penthouse magazine you promised to buy for me from US?! :(
Kaiwei threatened suicide.
I thought about removing my posts for a while, and decided that I shall not. If he is such a weakling, it is not my problem. If life means only ONE girl to him, well, he should watch Temptation Island and wake up his idea; life is not worth living. If he cannot handle this silly little incident in life, he possible would kill himself sooner or later anyway.
Eg:
"Oh, my hairline is receding. I think I shall commit suicide."
Maybe he should see this website. Maddox. He is damn funny.
And Bak? Even if you died I wouldn't remove the posts. So it is not worth it.
*****
The only reason I can think of about why Kaiwei is still civil to me after all I have (unintentionally) done to him is because I have all the power in my hands.
One simple click from blogger. I can say he had sex with me (which he didn't, ok!). I can say his penis is puny. ANYTHING. In case you guys are wondering whats my point, my point is that I AM ALL-POWERFUL!!!
LOL... I don't think any guys would dare to offend me from now on.
Don't worry, little boys! I am usually kind and nice...
-You men should know the seriousness of infidelity. Everyone gets hurt, precious trust which is lost is never regained, and in most cases, you lose both the girls. Go fuck a llama.
Ha! Now everyone is writing bad comments! I think u people just want me to respond and rebutt, ala previous post.
But too bad! I can't be bothered. I shall just delete the comments.
Lalala!
Shall blog later, I'm too tired after Nicholas tse's stepsister's wedding at the Ritz.
When there is love, there will be hate. For every 30 or so people who tell me they absolutely love me, there would be 1 idiot who wishes to be special and begs to differ.
Hate Mail?
Here are my responses.
(They are uneditted. The email address is real, you guys can spam him all you want. The words in bold are my responses.)
From: "Kenneth Yong"
Subject: My friend icq me ur blog site; first impression, NICE Interface! Sparked my curiosity, until I came across...
To: xiaxue_blog@yahoo.co.uk
My friend icq me ur blog site; first impression, NICE Interface! Sparked my curiosity, until I came across at ur comments on the FHM page (true, guys NEVER miss such pages). Whatever.
It is VERY offending how u term S'pore men to be ALL the same with bad taste.
When did I say that? I'm saying generally. Or at least those who voted. I did not say that all of them have bad tastes.
Get a grip, FHM is available in many different countries, naturally, contents are different. During a poll on Top100 sexiest women, UK/US FHM will have their TOP 100 while SG/Asian FHM will have theirs too. Asian men's tastes are always different from Caucasians. So dun compare.
You are an idiot you know? Precisely because it is different, we compare. Whats the point of comparing two identical things? And guess what? I wanna compare, I compare. You cannot stop me, or control me. Its my blog and if u are not happy, don't read it.
And about the CONSPIRACY abt the Mediacorp artists in the SG FHM's TOP 100, even if its TRUE, its abt POLITICS, u'll understand when u grow older or started working in the MEDIA/ADVERTISING industry.
Whats your fucking point?
Every SG man has different unique taste, and FHM is MEANT for men to comment abt the girls in the content, NOT for young girls the LIKES OF YOU to even comment abt the girls (who are pretty enough to warrant a page or a corner in FHM) in FHM, least to comment abt the taste of SG men being bad.
FHM was meant for men to comment? Correct. Thus, I did not comment in FHM. And my blog site, if for ME TO COMMENT. So I comment in my site. Whats wrong? And guess what? The taste of SG men is bad. I repeat that. The taste of SG men is bad. It is my opinion, and I am saying that in a little space of my own in the internet world (and if u realise u are the intruder here), what's wrong? My blog is supposed to be for me to write my intimate thoughts. I am generous enough to share it with people who enjoy it. If you don't, fuck off and don't come back!
IRONICALLY, while u commented that SG men who voted the girls to that particular spot in the poll has no taste, those girls are MUCH prettier than YOU in any way.
Where's the irony? Help me, I need a Phillips Bulb, I can't find it. So what if they are prettier? If you use your miniscule brain to think, I am not saying that SG men should choose me to have good taste. I am saying that there are many many sexier females out there, and the results are just appalling. And I am not even talking about Angmohs here. The truly sexy Asian women like Shu Qi and Vivian Hsu are just missing, to be replaced by what, Constance Song? It is ridiculous.
And of course, so what if they are prettier? Can't I comment that they are ugly?! What bullshit. Does that also mean that u cannot comment food taste bad when u can't cook better? Stop being a fucking arsehole. Even if I look like Quasimodo, I can still say that Constance Song is ugly. So there.
Quote: "Thats all folks! Since I spend so much effort doing this, please send this URL to as many men as possible to let them realise how bad their taste is.
Send it to girls to let us all rejoice in agreeing that Singaporean men's taste suck, which is why I remain single till this day."
Hahaha, you didn't choose to REMAIN SINGLE till this day, its because YOU DUN HAVE A CHOICE! Because, SG men's taste is GOOD ENUF not to choose the LIKES of YOU! YOU are juz LEFT ON THE SHELF~~~~~
LOL my dear. You know what u sound like? A 3 yr old kid. If you happen to read the rest of my blog, you will realise that there are plenty of men who are interested in me. And I am not even talking about the internet world, where my mailbox is flooded everyday with "friend" requests. I'm talking about real life.
But part of what you said is true. I am not single because SG men's taste suck. I am single coz the men I meet are not good enough for me, or it just happens that I do not have feelings for them.
Left on the shelf? ME?! LOL... Possible my dear. I would rather sit on the shelf and play with my palmtop then degrade myself to be with a guy who is not worth it. Like you, perhaps.
Quote"Alright actually I didn't put in that much effort." hahaha, even if YOU ever put in any effort, ya, those with bad taste might be interested.
Get a Grip and grow up! And dun ever lump all SG men together as the same. Becuz EVERYONE is unique, like you, ur friends, and me.
Whats the point here? That I should grow up? Yes, I wish I could, like 10 cm? Oh well.
But hey, guess who should grow up? Who is writing with shorthand? Becuz?? What the hell is "becuz"?
Who is the one whose real name is KENNETH YONG but uses a stupid Japanese name instead? What kinda idiot uses Japanese alias nowadays? You think you are really whats that, Tenshi Sensi? What the hell is a Tenshi Sensi anyway? It sounds like a sushi plus a perfume.
I wonder who should grow up. Mentally.
Yes. YOU. Are u still donning floppy Japanese socks?
If you are not afraid to put the above comments of mine, on your blog, for everyone to see, I'll respect your effort. I'll return to this place to check out your replies, and the replies from the rest of your friends. Last but not least, I dun want to make war, I am juz fighting back for the sake of SG men, because of ur offending comments in the FHM pages. You started it first! Are you mature enough to handle this issue? Or you're juz going to delete this entry away? We shall see...
LOL, challenging me? Why should I be afraid of a stupid internet person like you? You are the one in my site, and I am the one with the power. And I remember you, you are the idiot who said I was racist some time ago, about the Indian woman dream huh?
I thought you don't like what I write? That entry was like centuries ago. Why are u still here? Shoo, and have a great time with your "japanese" poseur existence on the internet.
---TENCHI SENSI---
Oh, shut the fuck up. Tenchi your head.
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I think its good that you're honest about yourself but there are some things that can be put forth less blatantly....you're trying to look rich? what for? For more respect, so people would think u have class? really...thats the lamest thing ive ever heard....Its not a rich look that gives u all that...its how u carry yourself. Expensive phones or ex looking clothes mean nothing in the real world. Give it some time..you'll grow up and see it for yourself.
disgusted | 11.19.03 - 6:41 am | #
Did I say I want more respect? And its the lamest thing u have ever heard? Well, its time to wake up, coz u are hallucinating and I did not ever say anything like that.
Its just an image I like. No particular reason. Like people like to act Jap, or some people go Punk and stuff. I like the rich look. Thats all.
I did not buy my phones coz they are expensive. I buy them coz I like them. Duh.
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jeremy will never have sex with you even if u offer yourself to him. so dream on...or wake up!
TRUTH | 11.19.03 - 9:00 pm | #
On the contrary. I do think Jeremy would have had sex with me if maybe we were in a secluded island alone or something. But thats not the point. The point is, you do not know Jeremy, and thus, your statement is utterly unfounded. You cannot prove that Jeremy would not have sex with me, so dream on... or wake up!
And I do not really want Jeremy to have sex with me. Oh wait.. Ok maybe I do.. But thats not the point. The point is, I WAS JOKING. What kinda idiot cannot understand that?!
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And about the Weihui issue.
Just one point. Kaiwei did not choose Weihui because she is better than me. Kaiwei chose her because she came first, 5 years ago. If she is that great, Kaiwei would not have lied to me in an effort to make me his gf.
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Yup thats all. And in future, if you wanna write bad comments, have some balls and send it to my email. NOT LEAVE AN ANONYMOUS COMMENT LIKE SOME SHIVELLED PRUNES.
