I have absolutely nothing interesting to write about.
I've failed you all as a full-time blogger.
I'll go kill myself now, and end this misery.
:(
Retro partying
I just have a lot of clubbing photos to post up... Beware: Lots of eye candy. :D
Tattinger Sky Lounge!
Went with Eileen to MoS again - Sky first!
There I saw Shan and Jeffy, with their friends!

And saw Rosalyn too, with her boyfriend Wy Kidd (Me: "So is he Song or Kelly?" Rozz: "SONG LA, THEN WY KIDD KELLY AH?!" Me: "Heehee.")
I love Rozz, she is siao.
Beef FANtastic! *jarring music*
Off to 54!


We heart MoS!
Next up, Butter Factory.
It's a very happy looking place in MS, but I am a disgusting spoilt princess so I refuse to pay for clubbing unless it is a super big event or overseas.
Why should girls pay for clubbing? It is ridiculous. We lure the men in, and the men buy us drinks. That's how it works.
Thus, Russell and I scooted off to play mahjong instead.
I think blogging spoilt me so much. Nowadays I refuse to pay for manicures or hair styling or other things - like clubbing... I just expect them to be free. Wtf. I sound so uppity, I feel like slapping myself as I write this.
(Speaking of which, I got my Pure membership card! Yay! Thanks MoS!)



During mahjong I attempted to take off my contact lens without sufficiently cleaning my fingers... thus resulting... in... yawn... a sore eye again.
The same damn eye gotten at the same place while doing the same thing: Russell's place during a mahjong session.
I can't believe I'm so stupid. That's it, no more fucking around with eyecare.
MoS again, with Kel, Russ, Max, and a few of his friends from KL.

Love this photo
Handsome ah, girls? VJ Max! Single too! Go go go

Max's friends from KL
That's it. Took forever to add those groovy colours and words. *yawn*
Why don't these people get it?
Recently I keep seeing disgusting people.
It is ok to be disgusting, I think, but it is very annoying when disgusting people do not ever admit they are disgusting?
Same as when dumb people act like they are all smart and tries to give you advice.
I mean, sometimes, it is kinda obvious people are laughing at you. Either you laugh with them (ie at yourself too), or you stop being a clown. You really shouldn't pretend that the attention you are getting is glamour, or because you are good-looking or talented, because you are really not.
I tell you, I am sibeh suay.
Yesterday I was playing mahjong at Sandra's place, and at the background on the TV flashed this girl.
The "full-time model", as she self-proclaimed, was acting! Wow, I guess this means she is an actress and thus is like all jazzed up and red carpet and whatever.
Not. She acted as a slutty SPG, and on screen she was touching an gross fat angmoh in what blind people would presume to be a seductive manner.
You know, those TV extras with no acting skills whatsoever, and seeing them act makes you want to weep and kill all the babies so that the human race dies out?
(At this point you people should realise I have a personal vendetta against her - and that is because she is the one who set up the petition to ban me from Orchard Road. HAHAHA! Won't it be funny if it came true?
Me: *walks into Orchard road*
-SUDDENLY A TRIO OF BURLY POLICEMEN WALK OUT AND BLOCKS ME WITH SHIELDS -
Policeman: Are you Xiaxue?! Sorry miss, you are banned from Orchard Road.
Me: Oh? Oh sorry sir, I forgot... *meek voice* I guess I would have to shop at City Hall then.
Policeman: *grunts*)
Back to this girl, everyone of us playing mahjong just started laughing and hysterically pointing out her more obvious flaws, like the fact that the space in between her brow and her eye can fit in another 3 of her eyes - the space is that big and her eyes are that small. Ahem.
Well after seeing her I just starting losing money. Suay.
The thing is, I cannot understand. There you are, acting as a slut with an STD on a TV show... You are not a lead, you are an extra. Which part of that sounds like a glamourous job to you?
But yet these people can call themselves "full-time model"s. Where does that kind of delusion come from?
Speaking in the same rein, I received an email from Steven Lim yesterday, asking me to go down to Mediacorp to support him in that loser of a show he is in.
I can't think of another show that can so effectively put losers in their place, but yet, it doesn't seem to be working, coz these losers have their delusion powered on SO high, they won't get it no matter what.
Imagine, you are on a show specifically for losers - losers who constantly join contests to gain fame, but yet always fail.
Isn't that kinda obvious enough that people just want to laugh at you?
Looking at him on TV the night before was so painful. There he was, with awkward darty eyes and his yellow toga, dancing to some cheap song and relating some sob story.
To add to my cringing, he sent me this:
If possible, pls do some homemade good gesture encouragement paper, like "go go Steven" etc....or do your own " Xiaxue.blogspot supports Steven" to ad your blog....i come in peace
The idea of me appearing appearing on that show for a flash second holding the banner "go go Steven" is so laughable, that I actually choked when I read that email.
WHY DON'T THESE PEOPLE GET IT??
And how are you supposed to break it to them gently that they are being so so so very disgustingly deluded about themselves?
I replied to dear Steven that I cringed when I saw him on tv, and if I see him in real life I would spasm and die, so no thanks.
He replied:
huh?????????????????? dun like that lah...support lah...... I will mention you in my website i m grateful to u one.........make some special appearance la.... if you support me, i will have more confidence............. pls..........i beg u....i m friendly guy one..
His exchange for me going down to support him and holding my homemade good gesture banner is... *drum roll*
*pukes and flops around, dead*
If you don't find his absurdness funny enough, here's one more thing Steven Lim suggested to me:
That I change my top banner to a photo of him and I together, and he would pay me $500 for two years.
That would be $0.69 per day. (Thanks to Shuyin who went to calculate)
Thank you very much, I would love to do that for you, Steven.
As if it is not enough that I am tormented by these two people, a 3rd person also came into the picture.
If you guys remember, in the Going Nautical II entry I mentioned lightly in passing that the FHM King card is the ugliest among the colourful array of people featured in the cards.
Most people looking like this:

Would have no problems with someone saying that he is the ugliest among a deck of cards featuring FHM girls, but no....
Someone's a petty little bitch.
Here's the email he sent me:
I can agree that some of the gals on the deck are quite how u say, nnot so appealing, however u do fail to realise the fact tht they ARE at least imortalised on a deck of playing cards.. I'll be dying to see when YOUR face will be on one as well..
Why am i saying this?? coz of a comment u made about the king being the ugliest of the lot. Yeah to each his own n u have the right to say whatever u wan on yr blog but u have to be responsible for your own actions. What u said has created trouble between me n a close fren of mine n u wanna know why?? COZ I'M THE KING! If FHM were so stupid as to hire someone like me to do shoots like tht for them ( FYI i have been posing for FHM for half a year from Jan 2005- June 2005) then i guess it's their loss right?? But if u check back to a past issues i have had 2 fan mail written to the mag n published as letters of the month. So if i am as UGLY as u say i am then i guess loads of these ppl are jus blind n stupid yah??
Lastly, If u think u r so damn great n pretty, how is it tht izzy got the job at FHM instead of u?? i'm dying to see when YOUR face appears on the cover of FHM. Maxim is number 2 in SG girl.. FHM still reigns supreme.
Thank you for your time,
Sincerely, Jeremy the FHM KING!
.
.
.
.
.
.
....
Fucking funny!
Aren't such people so very amazing?
Firstly, it is ok for him to say that some of the FHM girls are ugly, but I just can't say he is ugly.
And secondly, it is not ok for me to "attack" someone (and my comment wasn't even personal to begin with), but his defence is to attack whatever he deems to be a weak point with me - which is that Izzy (Izzy who?) is writing for FHM instead of me.
(In case idiots are nodding along with his point that SPG "got that job instead of me", I'd have to explain that FHM's editor jumped ship to Maxim, which is why I wrote for Maxim instead of FHM. That, and the current editor is angmoh. Hmmm.)

Don't say I am mean. He started it and he is asking for it. I don't really think I'm pretty, but I just had to say that to shut him up.
Anyway, as I said, some people are so deluded, they will never get an insult. I mean they do "get" it of course, but they think everyone just has something personal against them, so these insults are never ever accurate.
I'm not going to allow any comments for this blog entry, so you all can just save your breath.
Can't be bothered with dumb people. Read The Full Article
Fuck you mac evangelists
Hahahaha!
Mac evangelists are so TYPICAL.
Firstly, contrary to popular opinion by idiots (really, intellect is GROSSLY underrated), I do not dislike Apple products.
How am I supposed to dislike Apple products when I have never used one in my life? I mean, of course I have used my friends' ipods sometimes, and they have never exploded in my hands, ignited into flames and subsequently singed my eyebrows, so I doubt there is any reason for me to dislike them.
Haha the image of an ipod exploding in my hands and scorching my brows just made me laugh hahaha imagine that.
Back to the angry topic.
I do not dislike Apple products. I am indifferent to them. They do not affect my life, and even their store is at Wheelock minding it's own business (ha, clever pun Wendy!) so it really doesn't affect me.
WHAT I DISLIKE AT THE IDIOTS WHO GO ON AND GO ABOUT APPLE.
Another accusation I had is that I claimed that everyone who uses Apple is a loser.
Now, if that is true, when you see Momo around, please shove an ipod into her hands and say gently, "Auntie, please use this!"
Momo will be like, "Huh, why?" and after some persuasion she might try it.
With this, you have effectively made me call my mom a loser and that would make me very angry with myself.
Unfortunately you can never do that before I have never said that EVERYONE who uses an ipod is a loser.
I am only talking about the people who buy ipods simply for the sake of appearing cool, to compensate for their deformed genitals and thus, lack of confidence.
If you are not one of these losers (check your genitals to confirm), then stop bristling over nothing coz I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT YOU.
How do we identify an Apple loser then?
Simple.
1) He puts down PCs all the time.
While Microsoft have never done anything truely damaging to him, he feels the absolute need to put something down in order for himself to seem superior.
Typical Apple Losers will tell you that PCs have a lot of viruses and his iMac/iBook is perpetually stable.
When you loosely mention that it is very fun to nudge people on MSN and that macs can't do that, an Apple Loser will sneer and just walk away with his chin up. While rolling his eyes and listening to his godly ipod, of course.
Oh, you wretched thing. It is so sad that an Apple Loser now thinks that you are beneath his higher existence of mere MSN nudging.
[ Big digression: Speaking of MSN, I cannot understand why MSN would provide Apple users with their product. Let them go talk among themselves all the time and see whether they still wanna use Apple computers. I know, I know... Apple people will just transform MSN into Apple-friendly themselves, but still, at least let them do a bit of work, yeah?
Imagine this scenario:
Potential iBook buyer: How much is this iBook?
Salesman: Oh, $2000. And also, you can't use MSN on this.
PiBB: Oh! WHY??? Omg! Is it because MSN belongs to Microsoft?! I think I shall stick to PCs!
Salesman: *Sings* Another one bites the dust! Another one bites the dust! ]
Coming back to the "virus" situation of why Apple products are so way superior to PCs, I would like to give this analogy:
Really ugly girl: "I have no STDS."
It doesn't mean much, really, if you don't get fucked simply coz you are less popular. If Mac evangelism came true one day (bless us all), and Apples ever got as popular as Microsoft did, then come show me you don't get viruses, and I will say yes, surely you are superior.
Asswipes.
2) He constantly puts down Creative/Sim Wong Hoo.
Just like Microsoft has killed his entire family, the Apple Loser (man, I should trademark this), ahem excuse me, the Apple Loser® acts like Mr Sim ate up his iPod and forced him to use a Zeeon.
Sim: USE THIS!Apple Loser®: NOOOOOOO! NEVER!!!
Sim: Aha! You won't huh? YOU SURE?
Apple Loser®: YES! Never! Even if I get sodomised! *gets secretly excited*
Sim: EH! I will... I will... I will eat up your iPod!
Apple Loser®: Please don't! *puts bunny ears on himself and wears a fishnet stocking*
Sim: Why are you dressed like that?! Anyway! *proceeds to eat up iPod*
Apple Loser®: GAH! NOW I HAVE TO USE A ZEEON!!! I hate you I hate you!
Sim: MUahahahaha
.
.
.
.
.
Ahem. That aside, here are the typical things an Apple Loser® says about Creative:
- Copying ipod
Kudos to them if they can copy your product and sell it for a better price. If you find that so unjustified, go sue.
Or or you know what they can do? They can go copy some soundcards, and sell it for a cheaper price! Woohoo! (Hear the Apple losers® go like, "But Apple is better than that!")
Whatever man, it's just an mp3 player. Chill.
- Inferior quality
Inferior quality for a cheaper price? That qualifies it. Shall we now move on to features?
Specs taken from here and here (I chose players where both are 30 gigs):
Weight:
Apple 136g
Creative 163g
= Apple

LCD
Apple: 2.5-inch (diagonal) color LCD with LED backlight
Creative: 2.5" LCD @ 320 x 240 Color Display 262,144 colours
= Creative?

Audio format
Apple: AAC, MP3, MP3 VBR, Audible, Apple Lossless, WAV, AIFF
Creative: MP3, WMA, WAV
= Creative
(What the hell is Apple Lossless? I think I prefer WMA.)Video format
Apple: mpeg, m4v, mp4 and mov
Creative: DivX™ 4 & 55, XviD5, MPEG-1, MPEG-2, MPEG4-SP, WMV9, Motion-JPEG
= Creative:
(DivX movies!)Radio
Apple: None whatsoever
Creative: 32 preset stations
= Creative:

I think this is enough said. I really don't care if Apple compensates in other ways like being more stable/hardy/has other functions.
My player is sponsored and I really don't need to give a shit about such things. The only reason why I am comparing specs is to prove to you mac evangelists that iPods are not just as perfect as you think it is.
3) He gets very angry when people say that iPods/iBooks are no big deal
Having no other life than to be a slave to a piece of machinery, the Apple Losers® will risk leg and limb to quarrel and sever all friendship with whoever insults his Apple products.
Well that's that.
I find it very ludicrous that people actually think that if Apple were to sponsor me with an iPod, I would be writing bad stuff about Creative.
Well let me tell you this...
I won't, firstly because I have been using Creative before I got my vision:M, and that would make me a big idiot if I suddenly switched to Apple. Secondly, I support local products and I am proud of Creative.
Right from the very start I have always wanted to be endorsed by Creative (I am not), and never Apple. That's because I won't accept products endorsements that aren't ME. That's just so hypocritical. That would mean, if Apple were to give me their best player now, I'll possibly reject them.
Apple is no longer just a brand name. It's a religion now. The funny thing about religions is that you kinda just can't insult it nor even doubt it, or people will get angry and start massacres or burning Danish flags.
If you still don't get my point, here's the Scientology episode that was banned - spot the similarities.
I don't like religion. I think it causes way more trouble than it's worth.
Postnote: Haha, check out the mac evangelists yapping away in the comments!Read The Full Article
Yeah yeah, I am a product whore (so dumb, if I were a product whore I think I won't be talking like this about Apple Losers coz I won't burn bridges...), Creative paid me to write this entry (WHICH THEY DIDN'T), I am ignorant (I have used a mac in school previously for design... It is a $10,000 iMac which hung all the time, and everyone hated it), and I am being malicious for the seek of getting attention.
Every other reason they can think of... Except one: That it's true they are fucking annoying the shite out of people by preaching about Apple all the time.
Losers.
Stop going on and on about how mac is superior and how you can now use Windows on a Mac.
The bottomline is: I DO NOT GIVE A SHIT.
What I care about is I make my stand clear that Apple preaching is annoying, so stop it already.
Amazing how successful marketing can turn the common lemming into a complete brainwashed idiot.
Going Nautical! (Part II)
Advertorial
DAY 3!
Early morning, at 8am, we wake up to go to the sunny island of Phuket!
We took the Elephant Riding tour, and first stop, Patong Beach!

I can't express how much I like Thailand as a tourism spot. Penang was not bad too, but there's just something about Thailand that makes you feel like they welcome you to their country, and that Thailand promises you are bound to have a good time there. :)

It was so damn hot there but the beautiful beach more than compensates for that.

See, so pretty!


Ah sunny seas and smooth sand! Nice. First thing we do is to hop on to a coach again.

I get a shot of Weili with the nice blue sky behind him, but he is squinting again! That lao kok kok!

Much better
After this we go see the elephants! So exciting, I love elephants. :D

There were 3 baby elephants just standing around waiting for their elephant show to begin!
We started laughing at the elephants coz they were just standing around and like flapping their thunks left and right pointlessly.
Click to see how pointless they are
So cute yeah?
After this we were treated to watch an elephant show. I'm a total sucker for this type of shows, I tell you.
I brought Mike to the night safari and I told him everytime I finish visiting the zoo I feel like becoming a zookeeper. I don't know, it just seems like fun I guess.
:D

Clever!
I then bought bananas to feed the baby elephants. All this while Shuyin has been standing at the side, totally indifferent and a bit bored. Haha... She doesn't see what's the big deal about animals.
Funny mah, the elephants. They are so pointless.


"Squeak!" I swear this baby squeaked. SO CUTE!
After this we go on to the ride! Was so fun!!! (Shuyin stupid stupid de she thought we will ride the elephants like we ride horses... Uh actually initially I thought that way too then it hit me that elephants are very big indeed)
The elephants are so clever! They all climb up a mounted area and slowly wait for you to get on their backs.

We decided to all sit on one elephant, so we got a big big one to carry us!
It was so fun! I think it really won't be as fun if you sit with only two people, because Shuyin and I both sat on the sides of Weili, and when the elephant tumbles around it really feels like we are falling off.
Especially when the elephant moves down slopes!!! We actually screamed. -_-

Your favourite

HAHAHA!
I thought it was gonna be a short tour, but we sat on the animals for like 20 mins!

I keep forgetting not everywhere is as compact as Singapore. *blush*
If you think your ass is fat, check this out...

Big!
Shuyin is so disgusting!!!
Look what she did!!!

She dropped her slipper! It was so funny I tell you. The rider made the elephant stop and pick it up for Shuyin. The elephant's so cute! It started groping around pointlessly for the slipper, and finally...
It picked up a piece of rubbish for the rider!
Like, "Uh uh, I dunno lah, is it this you want me to pick up?" and shove the rubbish at the rider...
Haha... The rider smacked the elephant and the elephant put down the rubbish and finally got Shuyin's slipper for her with his trunk.
We thanked the elephant profusely.
But Shuyin was not too happy coz her slipper had elephant drool on it. Ha!

Ewwww... chou chou.

Taken by some helpful tourists. :D Looking at this, I can't help but feel quite sorry for the elephant... :( Around 200kg on your back can't feel nice.

That's right it's Somlee's monkey butt! Haha... Funny how there are so many lumps.

Miss World ok mai siao siao!
I think Somlee is very pointless too. She was just sitting here and extending her hand grudgingly for tourists to hold, and in between tourists she would scratch various parts of her body.
Heehee, the one after me kena her armpit.
We visit a Thai temple next!

Such a nice postcard-sy photo! :D



Love these photos

We all took turns to snap a shot in front of the temple.
Alas! We could not go in coz we were in shorts. :(
Weili took a photo of a lotus in the lotus pond outside the temple:

Aren't lotuses so beautiful? For those of you who don't already know, the lotus is the Goddess of Mercy's favourite flower coz it is born in mud and dirt, yet it is so clean and pretty when it blooms.
After this we were all free to roam around Patong beach for a few hours, and I tell you, the shopping there will just exhaust you!
Endless rolls of shops all selling beachwear, sunglasses, imitation bags, and watches, at cheap cheap prices!!

No wonder Shuyin and I were so tired...

I bought a bombshell-looking watch ($8), a fake burberry's travel bag ($20), and a pink Dior swimsuit ($12)!
I was a very happy girl!
Something very lucky and very unlucky then happened simultaneously.
First, I sacrificed shopping time to go look for an internet cafe, so I could go upload all my photos into my thumbdrive, as my memory stick was getting full.
Immediately after I uploaded the pictures, I lost my camera.
*smacks forehead*
That's $520 (inclusive of a 256mb memory stick bought separately) gone! But in any case, at least I have some consolation that my photos have not all disappeared together with the cam!
I really won't know what to do if that happened coz this is a sponsored trip afterall...
So we use Weili's cam from then on! With a heavy heart we went back to our cabin to get ready for the Gala dinner.

Hehehe... The Phuket sun made us all radiant.

Everyone was milling around the Grand Piazza before the offical gala dinner begins. Cameras were snapping, and the Captain was around too, taking photos with various cruisers.

Shuyin and I sipping champagne. Hmmm
We went to watch another complimentary show after this, called Tropicalia, where the entertainers on stage did a variety of shows including dances and dangerous stunts.
I must say we are really quite pampered! Shows, then food and music. Coolness.
To our Gala dinner!

So posh. Shuyin likes people to push in chairs for her.

Haha acting rich.

There's the menu!

And our food!
Yum! After this we go back to cabin...

Only to find it is so messy!

Terrible, and check out is tomorrow.


...
Don't ask.
We go up to the helipad again!! The wind up there is really nice! Then you can sing Shan hu hai while you do the mian xiang hai feng!


Hehehe... I felt so happy up there with my lips flapping in the wind, that I started to do cartwheels on the helipad. Weili took a video of it, but I'm never gonna show it to the public eye coz I can't do cartwheels for shit.
Speaking of cartwheels, it is only me? I have the urge to do cartwheels everytime I am in a big spacious area. Hmm.
We were totally exhausted so Weili and I napped a little, and went to watch the Las Vegas Revue show next!

It's called Fever and the tickets are only sold at $20!!
It's a must-see man! I have never seen a topless show before in my life so was really curious what it's like, and $20 is real cheap compared to Crazy Horse's prices ($100?).
Obviously photography was not allowed while the show was on, so there's not gonna be any photos.
Anyway, it was all rather artsy and the girls were all in elaborate costumes that just exposed the boobs, meaning instead of like a normal bra the bra would just be the underwire UNDER the boobs.
I told Weili I really don't like the underboob accessories coz they make the girls' tits look kinda like udders, but otherwise the show was very entertaining and novel. Well, to me at least - and not you who go to Yangtze every other day.
We sleep.
DAY 4
The last day on board! We use up our $200 dining credit at the Palazzo for fine Italian dining!

It is a small restaurant with really elaborate Renaissance-que decorations. Look, there's a nude girl! Ha!
She kinda fat, like me.

I only want to eat foie gras and lobster thermidor, but as it turns out the lobster costs like $140 (for two persons) so we had to give up the idea. :(
Nonetheless, we had foie gras, which is my favourite food in the world!

3 pieces of foie gras and so so so so so good, my god! I love foie gras. LOVE IT! WOULD KILL INNOCENT CHILDREN FOR IT!! (I am kidding)
I love foie gras. Looking at the picture makes me real sad. :(

Shuyin's rack of lamb! YUM!

My pasta with portobello mushroom! Very delicious!
And the best choice of all, Weili's tenderloin!

The beef was tender, the potato gratin at the side was smooth and creamy, and there is a piece of foie gras that came with it! Perfect!

And the Petit fours!

Sigh, what fabulous food... And fabulous service too!

With this we go back to pack, and attend the farewell party at the Galaxy of the Stars... Weili and I went down to the Captain's Bridge where we found this!

35,000 eggs are a hell lot!
Finally, we went down to the Pavillion again, where we waited for checkout.
There was still two hours left, so I took out my pack of FHM playing cards.
Instead of playing Daidee like we were supposed to, we started checking out the girls on the cards, and I invented a new game!
Some of the girls on the cards were really quite morbidly ugly, so we divided the pack into 2 sets of cards.
Shuyin was to be the judge, and Weili and I would take a card from our pile, and go "1, 2, 3 and flip!"
Then we will see whose card is uglier, and the person wins that round, haha!

Freaking funny! We kept meanly laughing at people. I got 3 kings (he's the ugliest of all) and still got into a draw with Weili! Sucks. I should win!
In the end the worst cards to have would be the classic pretty girls like Denise Keller or Ase Wang. They can't win anyone unless they pit against each other!
We finally took out the top ten thump cards to get...

I KNOW JING MOK IS YOUR FAVOURITE! Hahaha... Actually, I think the best trump card to get is Dao. No one can beat her - face, name, or otherwise. Except maybe Diana. LOL
(I know my Maxim shoot is even worse than most of them. That means I am an expert when it comes to ugly men's magazine shoots and so I can judge them. HA)
And that's that! We go home!

Loads of shopping to carry back!
Was such a fun-filled trip!
I think cruises are really worth the money coz it's only around $500 per person, and you get to go to two countries (sometimes) and all food, lodging, and amenities are provided! If you calculate a bit, you will realise that air tickets plus a hotel will already cost more than $500.
And guess what! If you decide to tell Gasi Holidays you want go book a cruise ticket now, you are entitled to a $20 Spinelli's voucher too! Cool yeah?Read The Full Article
For bookings and enquiries, please contact Gasi Holidays at 6355 0016 or
email at cruises@gasi.com.sg.












