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Me: "HA! Hey come see this baby, Paris Hilton drew this in jail!"

Mike: "Where...? That?! HAHAHA SO CHILDISH!" *continues to guffaw to himself while giving his attention back to the TV*

I don't know why, but I thought that was so funny!

I'm just imagining Paris standing at the side of Mike, pouting, frowning and stamping her feet, and she goes all "I'm not childish! That's not hot..." in her silly drawl, and Mike, looks at her and laughs and continues to eat his chips while explaining slowly, "But Paris... It is...".

Hehehehe...

Isn't it funny? Paris drew herself without the wonky eye!

DETECTIVE WORK! There seems to be a Dear Harvey note stamped on it! Must be her note to Harvey Norman to send her a bed!

That's not funny, I apologize.

I know I kinda sound like I don't like Paris, but I do! I find her entertaining. :)

I actually got quite pissed off with the tabloids when they all posted up videos of her crying when she got sent back to jail...

All the tabloids had captions like, "Oh joy! Paris Hilton gets thrown back to jail!"

...

People already so poor thing then still they wanna say such mean stuff about her!

I mean, sure, she can't read random tabloid websites in jail la, but I don't think she's a bad person, right?

SO WHAT if she takes drugs, is racist (but never did anything about it), has regular sex that is sometimes taped, and flashes her vagina to the world?

These are all her personal choices that don't affect the rest of the world (except that the world chooses to know about these things themselves, which is not her fault)!

I'm sure there are many other really bad people outside who deserve to go to jail more than her!

It's really disgusting how so many people are rooting for her to go to jail, just out of pure spite.

They are just unhappy to see her leading such an easy life, and they want her to get a piece of the hardship pie.

But it's not her fault she is born lucky! So why should she deserve to be penalised for leading an easy life?! Other people who are unhappy about it can jolly well do good deeds this lifetime and hope that their next life will be a hotel heiress!

And all the guys I know hate her to the core... and their reason?

SHE IS A DIRTY SLUT.

???????

How is she a slut?

After reading about her for like 2 years or so, she had like, what, 10 boyfriends or something? And these guys are all either cute, or Greek shipping heirs!

Obviously, when a girl is pretty and eligible like her (yeah right, as if you guys won't fuck her if you had the chance to), she will get a lot of proposals from guys who are interested, and I'm SURE like 80 percent of girls won't say no to fucking a shipping heir with $30 million in inheritance and looks not bad!

You know what guys? It's just SO EASY.

Too easy for you guys to just talk.

All these male tabloid writers and other guys who "despise" her.

AND SO WHAT IF SHE IS A SLUT? Is it against your personal morals that girls are sometimes easy to get into bed? No, coz obviously guys don't seem to have anything against prostitutes, right?

Why Paris then?

That leaves only one possible conclusion:

You guys are just sore that although she is so slutty image-wise, yet you know that she would never have sex with you.

Yup. Sad isn't it?

Next time you guys call a girl a slut, think about how stupid you sound, when the party who hears you know that despite being easy, that girl you insulted would never touch your penis with a ten-foot pole. :)

Enough about Paris!

To those who are interested, I've got fired off Stomp for not going for the Wednesday night chats regularly (I apologize to the one or so non-star-blogger who wanted to chat with me)!

I won't say I'd miss anything though, it's honestly their loss (C'mon, I'm the best blogger around, man!) and I've been feeling quite regimented over there lately - seems that the sieving and editing they do have increased since the start, when I remember I was allowed to holler vulgarities and go as irrelevant I want to. Stifling.

Good old days those were...

Can't be helped I guess, since muthafucking stupid readers COMPLAIN.

That's what stupid, useless people do all day long to feel like they have some sort of power! They complain!! And businesses listen! And thus these people feel important! Because in real life nobody gives a shit about them! *shakes head*

It is in my humble opinion that Stomp should not listen to said muthafucking stupid narrow-minded readers, but what do I know? I've only been blogging for 4 years. =)

DIGRESSION!

You know what I realised the other day? I was at Stomp's party thingy, and in front of Gillian and I were this bunch of really loserish-looking "readers".

Gillian looked at one of them, and said, "Look at him, he is exactly the kinda person who tells you you are ugly and stupid on your blog you know?

"That guy, right there. Are you telling me you should care when someone like that tells you that you are stupid?" -- or something to that effect, and Gillian laughed.

I looked at that guy Gillian was sniggering at, and suddenly her point really hit me right on the forehead.

She is so right! These lower tier of society's dumbasses' opinions should not matter to me!

I actually got quite mad! Such an ugly and unappealing and socially unacceptable person has no rights to say I am ugly!!!!!!!!!!!111

And it is hilarious, really, that people get affected by these anonymous losers who force their opinions upon website owners!

In any case, remember that some time ago I mentioned a post about the top 5 most disgusting bloggers in the Singaporean blogosphere?

Well, I didn't post it because of one of the people in that post is a "star blogger" *roll eyes gently* and I was scared of being fired.

But since now I am fired, so be it!

I'd post the entry up once it's finished. :)

(NO, it's not Dawn, for the last last time)

Oh happy day!

I saw some new baby pink furniture at Ikea yesterday, and I can't wait to decorate my princess room!

Plus, I just had good food at Indulgz again (for advertorial 2), and man, I tell you, the food there is soooooo fabulous!

Now, if you guys excuse me, I'd go ahead and continue leading my quite perfect life. :) I will be much poorer without Stomp's paycheck but it's ok! Money comes and goes! Right? Right?? Stop being mean! You guys are supposed to comfort me!

p/s: Episode 5 is out!

Enjoy!

p/p/s: I just reread my entry and realised that the "Harvey" Paris was writing to can't be Harvey Norman coz in her drawing inside the "TV" is Harvey Levin from TMZ! Stupid stupid.

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Unbelievably enough, when I was out the other day, two blog readers (Nope, I will never use the word "fans". Oh gross! It's like so buay hiao bai like that) actually approached me.

The first one said he likes my blog but can I please update more often??

The second one said she likes my blog but there are too little photos nowadays!!!

Sigh... I cannot even go out in peace without being harassed to do work leh... But nonetheless, I've decided to oblige.

Ladies, gentlemen, and people-who-hate-me-but-read-me-religiously, I present to you...

136 photos.

NYC trip

As most of you already know, Rozz and I were chosen to be the webcast hosts for Singapore Day in Manhattan, NY.

That was donkey years ago though, because I was just too lazy to go edit and post up all the photos. That, and because I hate you. HA! Just kidding! I love you guys!

On the plane ride! Rozz took a photo of me looking glum.

Who wouldn't be?

23 hours on the plane to look forward to!

My little flight schedule thingy.

It's really important to know all the foreign time being converted to local time, so you won't miss your flights!

That, and if everything is converted to local time you can also calculate how long you will be on the plane. =)

My This Fashion jeans that has an elastic band.
Super comfy for plane rides!

Ready to fly!!

No make up + a gold sparrow necklace that Rozz bought for me.

*kisses for Rozzie!!*

Hours later, we arrive at the JFK airport in New York!

Seeing angmohs as service staff takes some getting used to:

It appears NY welcomes us!

Rozz bought boxes and boxes of these Ferraro Rocher in Frankfurt for 11 pounds each! They are really pretty, aren't they?

I want the pink ones...

AND HELLO NEW YORK!!

Ok, here's the thing...

I don't really like NY that much.

I KNOW! SHOCKING! I much prefer LA, coz I think the things in NY are simply too expensive!!

You can't drive there because traffic conditions are so bad, and cabs are expensive (well not unaffordable, but still, even on a cab you take damn long to get to any place because the traffic is so bad), and I hate walking "just a few blocks"!!

I DON'T LIKE WALKING!! Unless I am in flat shoes and I don't wanna wear flat shoes in Manhattan! Bah!

I don't know what I expected from NY really, but it's just like any other city in US except maybe there are a lot of flagship stores here for various big brands...

I guess I really expected to see Central Perk around the corner and celebrities everywhere... o_0

But nope, no celebrities, and best of all, no WALMART!!!

I was sooooooooo looking forward to going to walmart!! (Cannot is it? I know la, where got people can go to NY want to go to walmart... But walmart is really wu chao zuo zhi ok!)

So anyway, in NYC a bottle of mineral water costs US$2.

=S$3.50.

It's ok in a fancy restaurant, but people get thirsty often man! I don't wanna fucking spend so much everytime I want a drink!!

Hotdog stands selling hotdogs for 2 for US$5.

= almost S$4 for 1 hotdog!! MADNESS! Ikea's one is nicer, got unlimited sauces and only $1!!

I won't say I hate the place - I still like it - but once in NYC is enough man. I'd choose Vegas over NY anyday. NY is for sibeh rich people man!

Where do these NY people buy their groceries? I saw like NO place selling groceries.

No wonder in Friends they are always eating pizzas.

Also, I guess that 4 days is not enough for me to fully appreciate NY... we also didn't have people take us to places to go to, and that's why... Rozz and I had the most awful food the first day.

It was like cold noodles and some other rubbish. I pushed away my bowl of obscenities and took self-whoring shots instead:

I was trying to show off my chun li hair buns!

After this, we went to Vivienne Tam, who was sponsoring our evening gowns for the gala dinner.

So nice!

I tried to take a photo with Miss Tam herself, but she was a tad curt and said she was busy. =(

NY celebrities can't be assed with Singaporean bloggers!!!

(Ok then I guess I DID see celebrities, but I expected like A list sorts)

Taking the subway

Joan snapping a pic of us

For dinner, Joan's friend brought us to a nice Thai restaurant!

Super yummy duck curry!

Loved it

Next day, rise and shine!!

It's hello Central Park, Wollman Ice Skating Rink (although there is no ice currently, of course)!

Gillian looking glum for some reason...

Shooting me shooting her

Perfect weather made everyone happy

I had to

One more

Is that the empire state building behind us?

Pink extensions

For some reason, the heavy equipment were baby pink!!

Looking at them made me happy!!

And also, the leggy guys over there are like waiters??

MADNESS I TELL YOU.

The waiters over in NY are super good-looking!

Most of them are guys though, and they all look like models!! I was talking to this Singaporean professor who stayed in NY for many years, and she laughingly told me that all these waiters are all actors waiting to be discovered, that's why they wait on tables in the meantime.

Well, their loss is our gain! Hehe...

Preparing for the big day

End of rehearsals!

Outside Central Park

Gillian and I

G has such smiley eyes!

Walking along

Isn't this nice?

It's exactly like in storybooks!!

People are frolicking in the park's lush grass bare-footed! Kids are running about happily! Adults are at peace with the world and hugging on the park benches! Teenagers are playing frisbee while celebrating their youth!

I'm not even joking.

The perfect weather makes me want to sing and do cartwheels!

Tralala!!

Me + a statue...

It looks like one of those neoprint things where the background is fake. But it's real!

These horses are reallllly smelly!

AND SINGAPORE DAY ITSELF!

So excited about the fooooood!!

Laksa!

Notice chio angmoh waitress in background

Roti Prata

And Hokkien mee from Tai Hong!

Tai Hong put up a picture of Rozz and I when we interviewed him on GoL!

I wish he was my personal chef...

And we saw sibeh cute angmoh children!

Who is a SIA stewardess no less!!

Hen cute hor? The soft blonde curly hair is almost too much for me to take man. I want to hug her till she bursts!

And guess what Singaporeans are best at?

Queuing la!!!

An estimated 7k people came, and all the food was gone in a jiffy!

It was heartwarming really, to see Singaporeans overseas missing home...

Pure Chinese kid right? But why like even ABCs are cuter than locally bred children? Very weird hor? Is it the weather?

Hehe, the boy's guardians.

Ok, I know these two guys' photo begs the question: "Are they gay?"

I have no idea, they had a kid with them!

But if they are gay, then I think they make a pretty nice couple. Or maybe they are brothers? It's a mystery I will never find out.

My act cute outfit.

WHAT? I will never have a chance to wear my hot pink leggings in Singapore lor!

Straight hair.
My curling tongs got fucked and I had to borrow Rozz's straightening iron!

Rozz's boots!!

She had to borrow my pink socks and she said she felt very uncomfortable coz she knew that somewhere on her she has pink. LOL

OEI ROZZ pink is nice ok!

The crowds

Sambal stingray in NYC!

The $65 pink Hello Kitty bag I bought from the super cute Hello Kitty store!

I HAD to buy something from there lor... They even sold Hello Kitty TVs, Video cams, etc you know! It's so nice!

We move on to NY's famous public library. This is where they filmed The Day After Tomorrow, amidst other movies.

Random photos:

In America, everything is about extremes!!

That's why burgers have 8 slices of ham and 2 slices of cheese!

What's the point of slicing things so thinly, I wonder?

And that's it, back to Singapore via SQ!

Mike came to fetch me at 6am in the morning, and it's so funny that he is the one fetching me from Changi Airport... =)

I was so happy to see him I might have molested him on the spot.

More random photos:

Simmons party Rozz invited me to

Rozz and Doug

Me and Doug!

Pointless, only got 3 photos...

I've got a heart-shaped skin abrasion on my foot!

Isn't it cute?

I bought the Tommy slippers from NY for only $12! That's because they were for kids. LOL

Me without make up on a kelong.

I shall skip on this kelong story because it wasn't fun - for me at least.

Guess what Gillian got for me for my birthday!

Even the plastic bag is in my favourite shade of pink! (mind you, there are some shades of pink I don't like! Super anal one.)

Calvin Klein (I keep typing Calvin Kelvin) undies and still in my favourite shade of pink!

Plus a lovely Juicy bracelet! A real one! (I got a lot of fake ones... Haha)

So happy! Thanks G! All I did for your birthday was to draw and paste ugly stuff!

Was digging through Qihua's bag when I saw this bikini she bought and I fell in love with it!!

To my despair she said that the shop sold her the last piece, but then again she cheered me up by saying she bought the bikini set on impulse and would sell it to me!!

She didn't even wear it before lor!

I bought it for $80 (the original price being $99) from her. Shiok!!

I really like this bikini leh... It's baby pink with golden polka dots on it, a golden clamp in the middle, and at the back of the ass is the brand of the bikini in cursive golden fonts. =)

Also took a few shots of Mike's future condo...

Moving on on August 1!! Super excited.

These are the current tenant's furniture.

The balcony is freaking huge!!

Sorry for the blurness... Living room area...

Kitchen

Guest toilet

Guest room...

The current tenant is staying alone so he put all the excess owner's furniture in this room.

Mike's going to make this room into his workshop! Plus a bed for guests. LOL... I pity our guests, have to sleep in sawdust.

The master bedroom (I keep typing masterbat.. you know what I was typing. Something wrong with me) is huge!

Part 1

And part 2!

The two parts make the master bedroom.

I get to use that space for my princess room!! So excited leh!

Cupboard in princess room

Our toilet!

Mike's wardrobe.

The master bedroom itself has 4 built-in wardrobe/cupboards can?

SO SHIOK!

And it is bigger than what it looks like on the pictures. 1,500 Sq feet. =)

Back to random pictures...

(After 2 hours I am STILL writing this blog entry. -_-)

QQ and Kelvin brought Mike, Tim and I to eat at this Shin something restaurant at Vivo City!

The food there is super nice! You can order a lot of things on charcoal grilled skewers, like foie gras (2 pieces for $8.80, as seen in first picture), golden mushrooms wrapped with beef, etc.

Yummy!

We ordered so much the bill came up to $40 per person though. Sigh.

Manhattan Fish Market

With Shuyin, ZC, Wanyi, and Alvin

Charring the prawns

Super yummy!

The lemon butter garlic whatever sauce is super yummy! It's like clam chowder but not so thick. *slurp*

My sea bass

Wanyi and ZC.

I took this picture, and I said, "OEI! YOU ALL CAN BE MORE LIVELY OR NOT??"

And they did this...

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Damn jia jia lor...

Teo lala and me

Food finished!

My ninja tamagotchi (doesn't get more random than this)

Vesak Day!

For some spastic reason, we went to Zouk despite reports of it being so freaking full, the queue went all the way up to the bridge.

In Kelvin's car before we knew what was going to befall upon us

With Timmy

With Baby

After some heavy elbowing of the crowds, we finally arrived at Member's. Bah! (Thanks to Jack who brought us in)

QQ acting cute

Kelvin getting kissed by Tim

Candid shot! Hahaha... Tim is going to kill me

Painted Mike's toenails when he was drunk and asleep. Hehe

It took him all morning to discover it! Hahaha

NABEH TO THE GSS!!!

Great Singapore Sale has taken its toil on my pocket!!

Here's my damage:

$53

$23

$48

All from Forever 21.

You know what? The shops keep saying SALE!! outside, but once you go in, the sales items are like occupying one small corner! Then you end up buying the non-sales items!

Grrrr...

$10 bikini.

When I was looking at this bikini, I said to myself, "Woah so cheap, good, I buy already put at home..." and Eekean, who was beside me, replied, "Yeah well, that's a good logic, I really get it... So you buy it, and you don't wear it and put it at home!"

-_-

Actually what I meant was to put in in the new condo so that when my girlfriends come over and if they don't have a bikini they can use this!! Thoughtful mah!

When I explained this to Eekean she said she never coming over then coz she won't wear this pink contraption.

SO FUSSY ONE LOR! On the $10 rank only got pink so I buy pink lah! The other design is like pink flowers can?

$36

$23

From FOX. Sigh... I bought the jacket only because it is... in my favourite shade of... blah blah you already know what I am going to say. Plus it is comfy! I'd wear it on plane rides. =D

Make Up Store glitter eyeshadow. Pretty!

And worst of all...

Guess bag $159!

Original price was $189...

I bought it coz I liked the colour (duh! I need to stop being a slave of pink) and I wanted a big bag!

But it is so pointless as a big bag because the bag is already quite heavy even without a lot of stuff inside!!

-_-

If anyone wants to buy this from me I'd gladly sell it.

I don't want to total up my shopping expenses, so please don't do it hor, thank you. It's all proudly done in like one day.

Mike looking at the Suntec fountain. And it's pink!

Last batch of photos!

CK in 2 u party!

QQ, her friend Michelle, and me!

We started to kiss the CK poster model!

QQ really look like she loves this guy lor, go and kiss people's nose

Michelle look like hua chi

QQ also likes the girl

I look like I am horny for this guy

And the angmoh!!!

Wah lau don't know him...

When I commented that his hand is too high up on the tits he said he is squeezing it up. -_-

And last of all, to end of this longest blog entry in the world, are models!!

THE CK MODELS ARE A NEH NEH FEST!!! You'll see what I mean...