Saturday, June 21, 2003

Oh no I didn't have time to blog yesterday. Lets start now.

I got a shock when I reached Jurong east mrt.

Have u seen a more successful basker? Or are ppl at Jurong really so damn bo liao?

Recently I keep getting traumatized by ex boyfriends. You know June and I, we have alot of lesbian photos.

But I have never expected anyone to actually believe that she and I are lesbian partners. Well, stupidity is the only thing on earth that is really limitless.

I saw one of my exs quite some time ago at a Levi's store. The only thing I could remember about him is that he studied at Bedok ITE. And that I got together with him coz he stays very near my old house at Queenstown. He broke off with me coz he said that I was a little too ugly for him.

Aha. He is no hunk either. Oh yeah I forgot. Lets laugh at his cheesy name together. Shui Xiang. If ur name happens to be Shui Xiang too, I suggest u laugh at urself too, coz it is really funny. Anyway, he saw me at the Levi's store like 3 years after our adolescent affair.

My hair is longer, my pimples are gone, my double eyelids are miraculously there suddenly, I am taller coz I am wearing heels, and most importantly, I got make up on.

He took a look at me. I tried to siam. He took a second look and called out my name uncertainly. And then he started to look real excited and asked me for my number. He was not one to mince words. He said, "You got boyfriend now?"

I said I am attached. He asked me who my bf is. I said inside, changing.

June was trying the Levi's Type One jeans in the fitting room.

He said, "Oh..." and walked off a little, talking to his friend.

I sms-ed June to tell her to pretend to be lesbians with me. She sashayed outta the fitting room and gave me a hug, asking me "Dear, nice not?"

I smiled sweetly and said yes.

He looked so damn shocked. LOLz... Afterwards, he kept sms-ing me to ask me to patch with him but I told him not to sms me coz my gf is angry liao. Wahhahahaha! And he believed me!

Yesterday I saw him again when I board the mrt at Jurong east. I semi-freaked out, but he discovered me first, so there was no hiding. He started sweet talk and suddenly, he talked about our past. I totally freaked out. I told him that my friend was meeting me at the next mrt stop, Buona Vista, so I have to get off, see him again.

And I got off. Where got ppl so stupid one? Lesbians and both look like total females? Possible, but very rare. And 'lesbianic' when 3 years ago I was a normal girl liking guys?

After this I proceeded to watch The Hulk with James. OMG, please DO NOT WATCH THIS SHOW! Heed my advice, u wun regret it. I'm gonna talk about it. I dun care if I will spoil it for you, coz it can't be worse than it already is.

It is bad enough that the fella is a disgusting green. He looks like an over-ripe pistachio nut. I would like to mention that I personally call that nut Pikachu nut. Ain't i cute? LOL. Oh yeah where was I? Oh the movie is bad enough.

What is worse? THERE WERE ABSOLUTELY NO SEX SCENES! Can u believe the atrocious-ness of it! Ppl would tend to compare Hulk with the last Single Marvel hero show I guess. Thats Spiderman. No sex scenes! No Kristen Durst in transparent white tee shirt kissing, oh wait, a hulk?

The female is relatively ugly. I have this thing against Angmohs with black hair. I tink they look very evil. And she has this big mole on her chin. I dun like big moles on chins. And her boobs aren't 1/37359 as nice as Kristen's. WTF.

The lead guy has a flabby jawline, and bad complexion. He shld become the Hulk all the time. Suddenly complexion become so good.

Whats worse about the lead guy is that he wears very big purple underwear. The Hulk knows he is gonna become a giant and that his clothes will split, leaving him with only his underwear. Why HE STILL WEAR PURPLE!! Doesn't he knooooooooow that purple and green dun go together???! No wonder there were no sex scenes! It is such a turn off! But then again what kinda colours can go with green? Thank goodness we are not green.

13/15 of the show featured the scientific part of the how the Hulk became the Hulk. Which is BORING! Who cares about Nanomeds (what nanomeds?!) and gamma rays? There were no sex scenes! (Is sex all that u care about?! Yes.)

1/15 of the show featured the Hulk hopping around. This is actually quite funny if u imagine him to be a giant pikachu nut hopping around excitedly.

1/15 of the show showed slightly exciting stuff, eg fighting. Yawnz.

I was falling asleep as Dr Banner started to boil (yawn, whats new?) some evil concoction. Suddenly my phone vibrated. I took it out, and my sudden movement startled the angmoh siting next to me who was falling asleep as well. I dunno why I am telling u that. But I found it quite funny.

The sms read: "Can I woo you back?"

Eddy. Eddy. Eddy. Eddy. Eddy, I prayed. Oh wait, Eddy wun say cheesy stuff like that.

Sent by: Shui Xiang hp

I almost died on my seat. He had to freak me out with I was most vulnerable from watching a totally sucky show.

The show lasted for 2.5 hours, and by the time I took the last train to Jurong East, there was no bus to take home.

I decided the weather is nice. I walked. Its a 45 minute walking affair, if u are interested to know. Are u interested to know? But nvm, I already said it.

In the process, around 20 taxis who drove by stopped and asked if I wanted a ride.

Can't anyone take a scroll nowadays?!

Then this Indian guy, around 40 yrs old, asked me to get up his bike. Ignored him. He drove on.

And then this truck driver (Malay with a Bangala sitting beside him) wound down his window and whistled. I was talking on the phone to James, so I ignored them.

He stopped the truck a few metres in front of me. I HAD to walk pass his truck later if I wanted to go home. I was quite freaked out at that thought. And the road is very deserted.

Can't anyone take a scroll nowadays?!

I was forced to take a cab from there, so that I wun have to walk pass that freaky truck. The cab fare was $2.90, plus midnight charges. -_- Fucking horny men. I hope they all die.

Anyway, I bought another fake branded bag!

It is supposed to be LV's latest collection, Cherry Blossom, and the imitations can't be found in S'pore. I bought it from Yahoo Auctions at $150.

Today when I went to Orchard to shop, I realised that ALOT of ppl have fake branded bags. I guess I have suddenly reached the age where I start to fall in love with branded stuff all over again (read: since ah lian days) and since I can't afford the real thing (note my bag costs $1,600 I think), get the exact replica then.

I know the reason why so many females buy fake branded stuff. (I'm talking about those late twenties kinda women. And yes, their bags might be real, but I just refuse to believe it.)

Coz when I wear my (fake) LV bag, I feel like her:

When I wear my fake Gucci bag, I feel like her:

Ah, nice pubes. Dun stop me now. NOOooooOOoo! Dun stop me! Hand me the shaver! I am gonna shave my pubes into a LV logo!

Eddy, wanna see? LOL... Eddy nose bleed liao.

Anyway, I really like the bag alot. So far everyone who has seen it said it is ugly, except James, who was being polite of course. Why would men even give a hoot about ladies' bags?

I like it coz it is pink.

I like it coz it has happy flowers on it.

I like it coz it has this lock thingy that comes with a key! So cute!

Xf said my bag looks like a malay drum. She is just jealous. Hmpf.