Have you ever lost a friend through blogging?

Warning: 4,359 words. Super long blog entry, make some coffee and sandwiches first.

Once upon a time, there was an average girl studying in a average institution. At her tender age, she has yet to define what she wants in life, and without a drive to propel her to move distances, she was just another girl on the streets. A nobody.

Just like how the average person without goals functions, she lived her life by the day. A day is but a day to pass - and as usual she was entertaining herself by participating in mIRC chats with strangers. That day, normal as it was, had a little treat for her. She was delighted with what, or rather, who, she found on IRC that day.

It was Ian*.

They took off very well. Ian intrigued her with his vast bank of knowledge, and his excellent use of words. By society's definition, Ian was - as she immediately recognized - an intellect.

She loved talking to him, and him she. They discussed ideas, joked, and laughed. All in all, she treated Ian as a mentor, someone who she thought very highly of. Well, Ian was 26, studying in the university she couldn't get into, and he was taking his honours while excelling among his peers. She absorbed in many life lessons during the growth of their friendship, and she was especially delighted when Ian helped her score 83 marks during a take-home assignment she had to do.

Meanwhile, she thought that Ian must be enjoying teaching her as well, for her numerous sincere praises for him should be a nice exchange for his wisdom - though insufficient in contrast.

Slowly and surely, their friendship grew in a peculiar way - a teacher-and-student cum friends relationship if words were forced to describe it. Yet, Ian showed loyalty and protectiveness towards her, and she silently appreciated it. Friendship was of utmost importance to her, and she was grateful that she found Ian. She was that way. She fiercely protects all of her friends. If you are lucky enough to be considered one of them, she will stay loyal forever - sometimes to a silly extent.

In exchange she requests for a fierce loyalty from her friends too, and that they accept her as she is. If she traces any ounce of phoniness, bam! goes the friendship. She is honest, frank, and sometimes to the extent of blunt and tactless - but that's the way she is. In exchange, she welcomes brutal honesty back, without complain.

How lucky she was, to find a dream friend like Ian in this hypocritical era!

Ian also had a website. A simple, white, clean affair where he writes all his thoughts and feelings. Ian told her that this is called a "blog", and that "blog"s are all in the rage now!

She was malleable and impressionable. If Ian says blogs are good, then she should get one as well!

So she started blogging.

She wasn't internet savvy, and it wasn't easy. It was Ian who held her hand all the way. He taught her how to edit her HTMLs; he edited them for her even. What? She never knew that pictures in website needed to be 'hosted'! No problem of course, Prof Ian was there to help her. He hosted her background for her.

And she really started blogging.

How she loved it!

How good it felt, to siphon your thoughts into organized, clear lines of computer fonts! How nice it was, to write whatever she wanted, and be able to view them much later to see how she had once thought!

She discovered her love for writing through blogging.

She loved finding the exact words to describe how she felt, and she loved being able to express her feelings into a clear, concise sentence for others to understand her thoughts. Writing was an easy, natural task for her. If you asked her, she would tell you with her usual blatant tones that she did not understand why anyone would complain about writing being a chore at all.

And she was surprised at how much she enjoyed writing. All her life, writing has never been her forte. Her only means of comparison was her secondary school classmates, and they were the elite! She sincerely believed that the best amongst them could spell out the whole dictionary of words if he wanted to! One close friend even got accused of plagiarism at the age of 15 by a school teacher - how impressive is that?

Her clean, simple style of writing pales in comparison. In school compositions, she comes in second at best. She had begun to think that that was the correct way to write, and it dulls the joy of writing for her if she has to write in a format she dislikes.

But she knew what she was good at, if not writing! It was art - drawing, crafts, paintings! She knew she was good because people praised her every time she picked up a paintbrush.

She did not love art per se, but loved the generous sweet compliments coming after that.

As such, she was conditioned to feel good every time she draw, or painted. Was this also equivalent to the love for painting?

How different it is, she thought. The love for painting stems from being good at it, and the love for writing is there, just there.

She blogged whole-heartedly. Every single day, she put in efforts to make her blog a true reflection of her life. She did not want to look back at her diary and see it full of lies of course. Who cares about blogging for marketing? There were only two people reading her blog - one was a close classmate of hers, and the other was Ian.

These two people would not judge her!

She injects as much colour and humour into her site, because she feels that the world is disgustingly morbid as it is. She cannot understand why some people would chose to wallow in self-depression! Surely being happy is the key to a fulfilling life?

She wanted to get laughter from anyone who happens to read her. It's ok, she told herself, even if they were laughing at her and not with her. It is alright! Her intentions were purely respectable, and if there were people who wanted to mock her, then so be it! They have proven to be beneath her. She has tried to make them smile, at the expense of her own dignity sometimes, but if they remain mirthless she cannot force them to laugh.

And she was shocked. When she put up a guestbook on the third day the blog was set up, a few comments popped up - from complete strangers - telling her that her blog was funny and well-written.

Perhaps "pleasantly surprised" would be too mild to describe her feelings. She was delighted to see people telling her she is a good writer, because she has rarely heard that compliment before. Did she discover one new talent?

Meanwhile, the one person whom she could talk to regarding blogging would be Ian. Ian, being the friend he was, told her he agreed she was doing a good job and gave her encouragements.

Her readership grew.

Within 1 month, her readership reached two, three hundred visitors a day. Clearly, people loved her writings, or at least they were interested enough to have a look. If a blog's success if judged by popularity, then hers is a successful blog.

He gave her advice on how to write her blog (for instance her blog entries were ridiculously long and she should keep it to his length) and she took some, and left some.

She felt a change in Ian gradually. In his compliments, if there were any, was a tinge of him being slightly incredulous about her blogging. Sure, he still said she is funny, but merely in a manner reminiscent of the teacher-student relationship they had. Just like a teacher praising a student, it suggests that no matter how well the student scored, the teacher could always be better - because a teacher is always better.

When she expressed that this blog could really become a big thing, he was skeptical.

She was disappointed.

But she understood how he would have felt. His writing was much better than hers, supposedly. Why should she get so many readers? Is society's judgement of "good writing" wrong, or are all the readers deluded?

It became clear what Ian thought.

One day, Ian called her up. In a solemn voice, he told that her blog was read by all his peers in his college.

Honour students they were, he said, and nice, smart people. Ian told her that his peers, around 20 of them, had a gathering, and her blog was talked about.

It wasn't good news.

These friends of his believed sincerely that the online entity portrayed in her blog, the real, true her, was totally phony. In other words - they said with disgust - this blog was written by someone with the sole purpose of wanting to get attention, and all that are written are fictitious. If such a person were to exist, they said, then she must be a total bitch anyway.

She was used to being misunderstood by now. That's the price of being a writer. To write and let no one misinterpret even a small paragraph of text is almost impossible. It is inevitable! If each individual interprets the same meaning from a story, then surely Literature is not a subject to discuss at all?

She brushed off his serious tones and told him that she doesn't mind the misunderstanding by his friends, and it is no problem with her at all.

The solution was simple to her: He was to tell his friend they were wrong! She is not a fictitious creature, and she did not lie in her blog, and she was most certainly not a bitch to him.

At least, that would be what she would have done for Ian. Without second thoughts. She would have defended him - if not for loyalty as friend, then for simple JUSTICE.

But no. Disappointedly, Ian merely nodded along with his friends. He did not try to convince them that she was totally not the person they were talking about.

Why? Because they look down on her, and he is afraid to contradict them. Prima donnas do not respect such writing. She is funny, crude, and sometimes committing big fallacies in her blog. Why not anyway, it's her blog and her freedom!

But Ian's friends, regimented by society's reins, will never appreciate a person like her. Just because they are being regarded as intellects, or the "highs" of society, they take it that they can look down on people who are different from them.

They chide, they jeer, and they think they are the best - but they fail to realize one simple cliche often used: -

They laugh at me because I am different, but I laugh at them because they are all the same.

She thought Ian had accepted her for who she is, but she was clearly mistaken. Why, why wasn't he defending her? She would have done that for him!

He masked this motive of his by giving her an ultimatum - that she should change and stop behaving in this "childish" and distasteful manner FOR HER OWN GOOD, or ...

He didn't exactly say or what, but when she said there is no way she is going to close down her blog as it is her sweat, blood and pride, he then requested for her to take down his web link from her blog.

That link was the one that he put in himself - the one link that was there since the start of her blog. His decision to put it in, and now he wants to take it out.

She cried. She was so hurt that a friend would be ashamed of her, and so shocked.

He said that they could still be friends, don't cry! It is just that he ... he ... is scared that his future boss might see that he is associated with her, and he doesn't want that. Nor does he want his friends to know that he knows her.

That's NOT the way friends function! This is not correct at all!

"If," she enquired angrily of him. "One day, your friend decides to become a prostitute, will you fail to acknowledge her too?"

His answer was a yes.

She said, between sobs, that that was not what she would have done. If her friend became a prostitute, she would never be ashamed of her friend just because of the occupation she has. If anyone were to insult her friend, she would stand by her friend and tell the "insulter" that although she is a whore, she is a lovely person.

He argued otherwise and said that no! People judge you by the company you keep, and he is not taking chances.

Scum like this, she thought, it's no pity losing him at all. And what's more, the indignant part of it all lies in the fact that she was NOT WHAT THE FRIENDS SAID SHE IS! One simple clarification from him would have done the trick, but did he bother?

"So," she asked, "If we meet on the streets one day you are going to pretend not to know me?"

He answered in the affirmative.

She thought about this the whole night. Was it worth it, her blog, to make her lose friends in this manner?

She really wanted to take his advice to shut down her blog, and reclaim his friendship.

She very almost did it.


But she made up her mind. He was just an asshole only thinking of himself. If that is the way he treats friends, then she shall not need him. He can, she thought angrily to herself, jolly well work under a BOSS for the rest of his life, that rigid little rag.

He can remain superficial friends with the "company" that he has chosen specially for others to judge him by.

How saddening it is, she thought, that society molds humans into this certain form that they should be? Why let social norms force you to make decisions you do not want?

She told herself she is NEVER gonna become a person like him. These people are precisely those that will stab a friend in the back if the friend is in his way of being promoted. She is not like that, and will never be.

*

That was 1 year ago.

Now, her blog is famous. The very same blog that Ian had been skeptical about, the very same writing that he said was disgraceful, had made it.

It was now the most popular Singapore blog, and she, as no other person as done, has been interviewed on the Straits Times as a blogger. If anyone were to say "Singaporean Blogger", then surely her name will surface.

Though many beg to differ, one has to admit that mass appeal IS power. Many dislike her, but so what? Many love her too. And besides, to be able to create emotions with writing is formidable as it is.

If that day, she had taken his advice to close down her blog, she would still be a nothing now. An absolute nothing.

She thought back a little:

She was chosen to intern at Today because her lecturers saw her blog, and that's where she learnt so much.

She is now working for a comfortable salary because her boss saw talents through her musings.

If she had taken his advice, she would be an average Jane slogging away in an admin job now, most likely.

She would not be earning money for doing photo-editing freelance because she would not have even bothered to learn photoshop - or even if she did would have no platform to showcase her talents.

She would not have many numerous valuable friends, and gotten so many good suggestions and encouragements.

She would not have grown to be indifferent to selfish comments directed to her by bitter, cynical people. She foresees herself as being far more juvenile and naive as she is right now.

Her writing would not have improved and she would not be writing freelance for newspapers.

IF SHE HAD TOOK HIS ADVICE. But she didn't.

She chewed on her nail and thought to herself - at least now she is somebody.


*


Ian was gone from her life for one whole year. Suddenly, with regards to her one entry on how she regrets going to JC instead of poly, he resurfaced.

His mail went like this:

Saturday, September 18, 2004
I've screwed up my life
i dunno if it's cos i read it at 6am but i thought this has GOT to be the best thing i've seen on your blog ever since u set it up... (with my help of cos, on that fateful night, altho i've perpetually failed to see any mention and/or credit to dear old me)

not cos it's self-slamming, but because it was so fuckin brutally HONEST i swear to god i'm just abt to cry (but i didnt) countless nights i've sat with my ex-nus-classmates at zouk's wine bar, nursing drinks. all of us are corporate whores now, discussin the newest industry trends, stock options, who's gettin married, who just bought a new house, who just bought a new car, and all that inane crap.
just as often, in those occasional solemn moments, we talk about how fuckin lucky we are, that we are on the right side of the system, the cold unforgivin singapore education system. cos we made single digit points at O lvls, and made it to nus, and graduated with honors. that's why we're sittin here havin the drinks, not behind the bar mixing it

and i read this entry.

and for the first time, i'm seeing this from the perspective of one who's on the other side of the system. i cannot claim to be holy or that i feel your pain, but it was introspective, and it was real,and it was fuckin painfully brutally honest. and i felt it.

i dunno if u'd think much of this at all, but i personally felt this one single post re-defined your website, your blog, your life. but heck, what do i know? maybe all that obnoxcious bullshit that was on there all along was merely a second persona or a false front. i dunno, i remember a conversation once between me and a friend that went like this

friend (A) : hey dya read
xiaxue.com?
me : yeah, it's kinda entertaining
A : fuckin funny man,
that chick's sucha loser
me : errr ok
A: comon!! it's really quite
funny!! she has no fuckin idea people are laughing AT her and not WITH her!!
me : i dunno, i kinda know her, i read her blog and i thought it's kinda
sad, that everythin on that website, is her tryin to be sumthin she's not..
A: duh, watever, i jus think it's funny
me: ...

then i read this entry, and i just SO felt it, that this was a real person who was writin somethin, pourin her heart out, albeit on a publicly-accessible forum, and everything that entry encompassed was a TRUE reflection of an actual human being. my shrink told me once, he said "Admittin u have a problem is the 1st step to recovery" i dunno if that statement by Dr. Ang is appropriate in these circumstances, but i do hope things work out for ya.

u don't have to reply this email if u choose not to, it's aight. i understand, sum things work out, some things don't.

and with this, i wish you the best, in all your future endavours. and in your life.

yours,
Ian*
(Prof Ian)

ps: i'd really appreciate it if this email was not reproduced in any form on the blog. this is a personal thing btw 2 human beings, Ian and wendy.



*

Here is her response to him:

Dear Ian,

I feel very happy for you that you spend your weekends wasted, thinking about how lucky you are to be able to spend your corporate cash on drinks which will spoil your liver and, amazingly, while doing that, add some money to the (pitiful) bartender's wallet.

No doubt, you are living a fulfilling life - I say, good for you.

However, I would have to correct you on your point that it is "painful" to be on my side of the system - if there were sides to begin with.

I do not seem to feel the 'pain' that you are talking about. Maybe you have misunderstood me, but I did not say that I am upset because I failed, due to my incompetence, to enter the "right side of the system". I am here, on this side, because I chose to be. I merely expressed regrets that my full potential (which is so huge it will engulf you!) is not realized because regimented bastards like you judge according to papers.

It was a nice little snippet of conversation you showed me between that twerp of a friend you have and yourself.

BUT I AM NOT INTERESTED.

Who is your friend? I don't know him. Does he know me? Oh, he does! But he is a nobody to me and I do not care what he says. *polite smile*

I would say that it was a nice little internet friendship that we had, but I would not say we were exactly close.

Therefore, when you mentioned that I am trying to be someone I am not, I hope an intellectual person like you will realize that that statement in itself is impossible. If I am always someone I am not, then you will not know who I really am. If you do not know who I really am, then how do you know that I am not who I am portraying myself to be?


Ah, a little confusing, but surely someone with an honours degree, which definitely (no doubt about it!) equates to brilliance, will manage to untangle?

Please do not speak as if you know me very well, because you clearly do not. I feel it's an insult to my mother, because she knows me the best, and at times when I am acting like I am not very smart, but in fact I really am, she doesn't even say that statement to me.

While we are at the topic of acting phony - I profusely apologize that, well, I AM that "obnoxcious" bullshit that you are talking about. That's totally me. Weird how you didn't say it is "obnoxcious" until your preppy friends started saying so huh?

Regarding the non-existent problem you were speaking of ... what is it? Oops, I forgot - it doesn't exist. Shrinks are often like that aren't they? Coming up with weird stuff. Oh but how would I know? I cannot afford to do to shrinks, no sir! Only the elites, the bureaucrats, like yourself sir!, would go to psychiatrists. The rest of us insignificant humans will swallow our problems. =(

Thank you for nothing, Ian. Your email, a loosely-masked attempt to try to tell me that you feeeeeeeel PAINFUL for my miserable life because I am not doing as well as you (how's your BOSS?), was truly a remarkable insight. I will take your advice!

Meanwhile, let me tell you something:

Shove that sympathy of yours up your boss' tight virgin ass.

If you ask me, in ten years' time you will be, to your credit, one of the higher ranking government workers. You will still be a nobody, unfortunately.

I quote Shianux: "He's the sort of people who will push paper till he is 45, after which he'll be retrenched by the Government. He has no skills to survive in the private sector". Shianux also cruelly added, may I inform you since you also nicely informed me what your friend said, "it is all the more noble and glorious to have fought and failed in the battleground of private enterprise than to have a mediocre existence being a slave to the state."

Oh no, I don't know whether what Shianux said is appropriate to the topic at hand.

Ask me, Ian, whether I would love to trade places with you now. Of course I would jump at the chance! I'd love to have people to all think I am smart and well-educated for once. But only as smart as the average graduate! Eh? That's it? Then no thanks.

Can you make 3,000 people read you a day? Try as you might, you cannot. Can I take your course in University, excel in it and finally replace you at your job? Yes, I can.

MUAHAHHAHA DO YOU FEEL MY POWER NOW? I can link you up (the horrors, what if your boss sees it?!) and there is nothing you can do about it but be fired! Oh no! What if everyone associates you with scum like me? Let's hope your boss is not as judgmental as you are, and that I am kind (which lucky for you I am).

(Isn't it weird how some people want to pay me to link them up, but some people pee in their ironed pants at the very thought?)

No way am I being conceited sir, that's not my intentions! I know I have a long way to go, and I will learn, sir, yes I will. But sir, I am different from you and the rest of the contented crowd at the right side of the system sir! I want to be the best at what I do!

All the best for your future "endavours" too!

Oh yeah. I cannot understand why you have the cheek to claim "credit" for my blog's success since you were the oNE WHO ASKED TO ME SHUT IT DOWN YOU MUTHAFUCKING BASTARD.

I'm so glad I didn't.

Love,
Her

p/s: oops, I already published it! Sorry! But I changed your name see?


*

The End.

*Names have been changed to protect the bastard.

Comments

sassyjan said…
wow~ u're up so late blogging abt this? it muz haf affected u in one way or another~

dun tink too much about that donkey & his monkey frens~
the audacity! how can he try to claim credit for ur success!

we're all behind u, reading ur blog always!!

Jan
http://sassy-jan.blogspot.com
D.O.M said…
wow...gd one lar.Gave tt sadomasochistic freak-head a' full of love thankU letter'.
min said…
you'll lose him alright, but then, he never was a 'friend' to begin with, was he? Funny too how desirable the thought of losing a 'friend' through blogging can be. But no less upsetting, for he was considered to be a true 'friend' for so long. You wrote the PERFECT reply letter. Won't change a single word or punctuation mark. You finally amaze me with your brutal honesty. Go gal~
Ivan said…
WHOAH.

I guess the sting of betrayal and abandonment by someone whom you once called a friend still hurts after so long, huh?

Well, can't say that I really have an opinion, given that there may be another side to this whole story, but this guy sure sounds like a self-serving bastard to me. It is tragic losing a friend because of one's blog, but if his mentality is really like that which you have described here, then perhaps you'd be better off without him in your life anyway.

Well, hopefully you've managed to find solace and a replacement in all your faithful blogders. And is it just me, or does this perhaps mark the beginning of a series of more serious blog posts, which may perhaps capture your more intellectual, more emotional side better, and show your detractors what you're really made of?

Hai~Ren
alicia said…
The bastard is giving NUS students a very bad reputation.My friends and i enjoyed reading yr blog.Many entries are very thought provoking.AND we are in a gd faculty.One that needs many distinctions in A levels to enter.So y the need to protect him?Publish his name and face. I want to tell the bastard something-Stop bringing shame to NUS.
fAtbAbe said…
wendy, i applaud u for ur talents. i have always loved to write and wonder y others find it a chore. i really love ur style of writing. this post is the one that touches me. though ur words drip with sarcasm, it was rightly done. ur not just a 'funny writer' or whatsoever. u r the real u. im so glad u din close down ur blog.

many many cheers
michelle
[LeSTAT] said…
i hope you (*ian) sleep well tonight.
wee nee said…
the most shocking part was when Ian brought up his shrink's advice. absolutely, horrifyingly, thigh-slappingly IRONIC.

perhaps Dr Ang should've been more specific. he should've said, "admitting that you have a problem is the first step to recovery. and im talking about you, Ian. your problem is that you're an asshole."
Remember ye olde Klingon proverb:

"Revenge is a dish best served cold"

Or my personal fave:

"Payback's a bitch"

Sounds like this "man" (and I put that in quotes because what he asked you to do and what he was NOT willing to do for you besmirches all men) deserved to be bitchslapped for even bringing up that ultimatum to you.

Maybe he's jealous, lah?
Frater Bovious said…
OK, here's the deal. Not so much for you, since it is apparent that at some level you do understand this, but for him, since he will not be able to keep from reading your blog that he now wishes you to give him some credit for that he may bask in your reflected glory:

Older 'wiser' man takes pretty young thing under his wing as 'project' the goal of which is self aggrandisement.

Pretty young thing has amazing talent, and older wiser man realizes she has surpassed him. Rather than be glad and praise pretty young thing for her talent and enjoy her success, must drink bitter tea and try to convince pretty young thing to stop before he is eclipsed completely.

It's no fun being the wise old man saving the pretty young thing that must stay dependent on him, when pretty young thing no longer needs his protection and advice.

Sad that pretty young thing only wanted mutual friendship and happiness for all. Very sad that wise old man is now bitter drunk that must make one last slap at success he could be celebrating.

{skip to future} Pretty young thing one day completely forgives wise old man. Does so for herself as life is better when not carrying anger. Wise old man not man enough to acknowledge pretty young thing. Refuses to forgive himself. Self importance too high. Need to be better too strong. Empty empty life, filled with cold hardness. So sad.

fb
Dum_Dum said…
Hi Xia Xue,

I have been reading ur blog entries for the past few months, but have been controlling myself to not to post a comment but rather, i should just treat it as "leisure reading". And soon, reading your blog becomes a outlet where i can read, laugh, as well as to improve my vocabulary... BOY, i was wrong... Ur latest entry affected me on this early morning when i am actually praparing to go to sch now... ok, i have never thought that someone whom i dun know, whom i had nv met before, whom i had never chatted to actually AFFECTED me... And there u are , the power of ur writing... I can feel for what u wrote about *i am not les*

Anyway, Xia Xua i registered for a blog account just to comment on ut latest entry..

AND THEN, i would just defined ur friend IAN to be COMPLETELY disgusting. and i am completely disgusted at his bahaviour. i am from an average neighbourhood sec sch (mind u i was from the NA stream) SP and now in NTU taking my degree. as such ermmm, i hope u dun hate me.. as what u wrote in ur blog...

ok i dun know what he truely deeply madly means by "2 sides" of the system. BUT i feel that i have to tell him this. Having a honours degree does not equate u to be someone of high character. AND I guess U HAVE COMPLETELY FAILED as a friend (even though a small friendship) and as a HUMAN. okie u must be 27 right now.haahahah i guess from 7 years old until now, 20 years of education made u STUPID is it... and of course exactly i know why, becos of what ur sch only taught u:

1. score high marks in tests, quizes and exams
2. earn big bucks in stock markets etc.
3. din learn to look from other points of views


AND most important of all, U DIN learn how to empathise rather as u put it: "and for the first time, i'm seeing this from the perspective of one who's on the other side of the system. i cannot" oh well well, ur sch din teach u that MEH? so seems like scoring a single digit on O level does not teach u huh... and maybe sch does not teach u how to look at a friend. that's why u CHOSE to be at the other side of the system and then continue gloating abt how fortunate u are... so yah sch only teach u to gloat and teaches u not to associate with people just becos they are different...

hahaha which means that u are just SIMPLY narrow-minded!
and not open-minded as what u probably would deny. hello let me inform u, u have just wasted ur 20 years of education, as it makes u a worse person and u are a complete moron, so xia xue be glad that u din have him as ur friend. and i am happy that u put this entry up to let me know that there are such people around becos u me, and ur fans know there we are so much better than him becos we have higher integrity even if we din study more than him.

So Ian, stop being such an asshole. concentrate on how to lick ur boss'boots then...
Dum_Dum said…
Hi Xia Xue,

I have been reading ur blog entries for the past few months, but have been controlling myself to not to post a comment but rather, i should just treat it as "leisure reading". And soon, reading your blog becomes a outlet where i can read, laugh, as well as to improve my vocabulary... BOY, i was wrong... Ur latest entry affected me on this early morning when i am actually praparing to go to sch now... ok, i have never thought that someone whom i dun know, whom i had nv met before, whom i had never chatted to actually AFFECTED me... And there u are , the power of ur writing... I can feel for what u wrote about *i am not les*

Anyway, Xia Xua i registered for a blog account just to comment on ut latest entry..

AND THEN, i would just defined ur friend IAN to be COMPLETELY disgusting. and i am completely disgusted at his bahaviour. i am from an average neighbourhood sec sch (mind u i was from the NA stream) SP and now in NTU taking my degree. as such ermmm, i hope u dun hate me.. as what u wrote in ur blog...

ok i dun know what he truely deeply madly means by "2 sides" of the system. BUT i feel that i have to tell him this. Having a honours degree does not equate u to be someone of high character. AND I guess U HAVE COMPLETELY FAILED as a friend (even though a small friendship) and as a HUMAN. okie u must be 27 right now.haahahah i guess from 7 years old until now, 20 years of education made u STUPID is it... and of course exactly i know why, becos of what ur sch only taught u:

1. score high marks in tests, quizes and exams
2. earn big bucks in stock markets etc.
3. din learn to look from other points of views


AND most important of all, U DIN learn how to empathise rather as u put it: "and for the first time, i'm seeing this from the perspective of one who's on the other side of the system. i cannot" oh well well, ur sch din teach u that MEH? so seems like scoring a single digit on O level does not teach u huh... and maybe sch does not teach u how to look at a friend. that's why u CHOSE to be at the other side of the system and then continue gloating abt how fortunate u are... so yah sch only teach u to gloat and teaches u not to associate with people just becos they are different...

hahaha which means that u are just SIMPLY narrow-minded!
and not open-minded as what u probably would deny. hello let me inform u, u have just wasted ur 20 years of education, as it makes u a worse person and u are a complete moron, so xia xue be glad that u din have him as ur friend. and i am happy that u put this entry up to let me know that there are such people around becos u me, and ur fans know there we are so much better than him becos we have higher integrity even if we din study more than him.

So Ian, stop being such an asshole. concentrate on how to lick ur boss'boots then...
Longer Short said…
turn on "Fake Plastic Trees" by Radiohead in the background, and the setting would be perfect for reading this entry.

Not to mention the lyrics..
ME, MYSELF & I said…
Martin Luther King:" I have a dream that my 4 children
will one day live in a nation where
they will not be judged by the
color of their skin but by the
contents of their character..."

perhaps you feel that society should not stigmatize u and u are right that they should not...esp frens

i am in ntu and i do not feel u or the roadsweeper downstairs is any inferior...education replaces an empty mind with anopen one...take haret...

posted one suggestion in the previous comments
on how you could hybrid tour writing style...don't know whether it helped...

another suggestion for your writings in the dailies is that you should pander to the targeted audiences as opposed to the general public...

p.s. critiques and detractors' comments is a double edged sword...the onus is on the reciever...
Me said…
oh my god. how im glad im not in nus. else i'd be ashame by his action.
yummyray said…
So Ian is a "he" right? Jz an indication of many species in the male gender haiz~~. Prof Ian conspicously belongs to one that degrades his very own kind. F*** off Ian!!
jules said…
The man has neither loyalty nor a real opinion. grovelling worm who backs down to save his ass. Buncha self proclaimed intellectuals goading each other on in their narrow, misguided and skewed views of society. To top it off, he can't spell 'obnoxious' and 'endeavours' right. you're absolutely right. he'll be mediocre all his life. mediocre and shallow. he needs to hire a new shrink, cos the old one sure ain't doing wonders for him.
Diana said…
ian sounds like an asshole. tell him to fuck off. yeah you did! what kinda lame ass spineless motherfucker is that? stupid.

anyway glad you didnt shut down your site, Wendy. My day isnt complete as it is.
Unknown said…
XiaXue

You are being tooo nice to change his name.
Study in NUS. Big deal. Graduate. Big deal?
What does he mean by being at the right side of the system? There is no right or wrong side. Come on! Such a subtle way to put you down and make himself look good.
There are a lot of such people who like to mental masturbate themseves to death. Living in self delusion that they are still the best, waiting for every opportunity to put people down when they have a chance to, so that they can still look good. And he is just one of them ....FOOLING HIMSELF.
Jayaxe said…
Damn.. it was so infuriating that I almost threw the coffee and sandwich at my computer screen!
NaiveGuy said…
I see that the Uni students are still looking down on us commoners....

oh well, it is not want certs that makes a person, it is the money that you bring home :P
Anonymous said…
That has got to be the BEST rebuke I've ever seen! I'm so glad that you believed in, and stayed true to yourself. Your ability to influence so many of us is the best testament that Ian was so wrong.

So what if he's an Honours student? I still think he is a shallow dumbass who is just plain jealous.

To Ian, and I know you're reading this: The single most useful thing that you've done in your pathetic existence, is probably introducing Xx to the world of blogging. Don't worry too much about how your boss will get freaked out if he knows you're accessing Xx's blog from the office PC. Hell, he might be a huge fan for all you know!
Blame Frater Bovious for my presence here--I followed the link here from his blog.

Anyway, I think Ian also posts on Yahoo as:

the_bass_is_ace_mmiv
and
archibal_vile

He goes by "Mike" there and claims to be from England, but his personality is exactly as you describe of Ian.

Now, I have a perfect plan to make you forget all about that Ian character... ;)
Yen Lynn said…
y dun u juz put up his link? haha...

hmm really enjoy reading ur blog. i believe u arent upset at all for losing such a "friend".

i shant say more, all dats needed to say have been said =D

cont to bring laughter to all ur blogders! stay happy always ^^
Miao said…
I guess it is the way in which the world operates that transform humans into such despicable beings. Well sometimes we just gotta take things in our stride :)

As angry as you may be (and as angry as I am for you), I feel that you should not have used the word 'b*stard' on him, because indirectly you are insulting his parents too. His parents are just innocent to be implicated by their ill-mannered child, whose ill manners may not be due to a lack of good upbringing and discipline from them.

Because some children are just so defiant and that they are good-for-nothings, and thus obtaining Honors degrees and pandering to bosses are the only ways for them to prove their self-worth (if they have any).

I'm not stereotyping all university graduates, but in this case, they are absolute morons whose levels of maturity are so low that they are beyond description.

Well Xiaxue, I'm sure one day you will have true friendship :) True friends who will not look down on you, who love you for who you are.

- http://qilixiang.blogspot.com
Lisa said…
I have to label this entry of yours as one of the best i've read from your blog.

As plain as i can see, *Ian is just plain jealous. Jealous of your new found fame & baby *Ian cannot seem to accept the truth, smacking right back in his face.

Pity the poor bastard, its us, the so-called "mediocre" people that enjoys fulfilling life with our "mediocre" friends and family compared to them, worrying about which friend they should keep up with in order to stay within the social group. Its a sad basket case...cos at the end of the day, when they're grey & wrinkled...memories of their younger days would be about which model they dated or slept with, wat cars they drove, what food they ate to feed their faces...etc.. But Us, we would be telling our grandchildren about how we stood up to the norms, fought for our existence & what life was truly meant to be.
Lisa said…
I have to label this entry of yours as one of the best i've read from your blog.

As plain as i can see, *Ian is just plain jealous. Jealous of your new found fame & baby *Ian cannot seem to accept the truth, smacking right back in his face.

Pity the poor bastard, its us, the so-called "mediocre" people that enjoys fulfilling life with our "mediocre" friends and family compared to them, worrying about which friend they should keep up with in order to stay within the social group. Its a sad basket case...cos at the end of the day, when they're grey & wrinkled...memories of their younger days would be about which model they dated or slept with, wat cars they drove, what food they ate to feed their faces...etc.. But Us, we would be telling our grandchildren about how we stood up to the norms, fought for our existence & what life was truly meant to be.
Miao said…
I guess it is the way in which the world operates that transform humans into such despicable beings, who judge character by qualifications, who buy love with money, who diminish the value and meaning of true friendship. Well sometimes we just gotta take things in our stride :)

As angry as you may be (and as angry as I am for you), I feel that you should not have used the word 'b*stard' on him, because indirectly you are insulting his parents too. His parents are just innocent to be implicated by their ill-mannered child, whose ill manners may not be due to a lack of good upbringing and discipline from them.

Because some children are just so defiant and that they are good-for-nothings, and thus obtaining Honors degrees and pandering to bosses are the only ways for them to prove their self-worth (if they have any).

I'm not stereotyping all university graduates, but in this case, they are absolute morons whose levels of maturity are so low that they are beyond description.

Well Xiaxue, I'm sure one day you will have true friendship :) True friends who will not look down on you, who love you for who you are.

- http://qilixiang.blogspot.com
frostie_fairie said…
*Ian is so mean.. i'd be so fucking hurt and upset if someone i consider a good fran were to do tt to me..

ha. Xx i love your letter, budden i still think u are TOO NICE to have changed his name. HA. u shld've like, just revealed his real name, or include a photo or smthg.. den we can all throw eggs at him on the streets when we see him..

oh n btw, Xx, we are laughing WITH you and not AT you like otherwise said =) so stay funny and happie!

tc` gurl
Tom said…
I like your recent blogs, Wendy. I think it is really close to people on this 'side'; the despised, the low lives, the not-so-well-offs.

Friends come and go. I am really impressed by your loyalty towards your friends, and if they do appreciate it, they ought to repay loyalty with loyalty, at the very least.

In retrospect, isn't it good that you managed to know someone from the other side? Someone who might be shivering now, knowing that the ugly history between Ian* and Wendy surfaces on the net and so many people are reading it.

Good for you that you've made yourself worth and famous. I congratulate you. I do hope you won't grow into another elitist with an i-am-too-elite-to-talk-to-you attidude.

God bless you.
Wei Jie said…
Hello,

i can't help but post a comment, so i decided to create an account just to post this msg. I think tt guy is a complete jackass.. after reading ur blog for a couple of weeks, i realised ur a realli farny person, definitely a great fren to haf. I sympathise him for his lost ;) continue writing! ur a great writer.. definitely impressed me =)

Cheers
Wei Jie
ronsensical said…
well done.. u should have posted his link and face up.. he's damn condemndable...
Nickie said…
*applause* **applause**

you wrote a farkin great response!.. Power siah!
hehe

That guy's obviously an obnoxious prick.. tsk.. can't stand ppl like that!
Mike said…
*HAHAHA*

That's some funny shit. Especially since he attempts to project himself as intellectually superior, yet comes across as an elitist @$$hole with poor grammar.

An ex-bf of yours? ;)
jing said…
omg. haha. BRAVOOOOOOOOO! tt guy's the ultimate bastard. grr.
you rawk girl.
Pinkposh said…
Great entry :D

That Ian is one of the most shallow person I've ever heard of. I got so pissed when I read about what he wrote to you. Such Nerve! And he and his bunch of phony friends are giving nus students a bad name. At this point, I'd like to add that my nus friends were the ones who introduced me to your site. :D

He's an ignorant asshole who is too wrapped up in himself, his own circle of friends and what the government have been telling people. And he is too much of a coward to think differently or even stand up for a friend. Yes he may be living comfortably, he may even be rich but gosh.. how I pity him.

Anyway you rock, Xiaxue! Don't let such people get you down, they are purely for amusement purposes, we're laughing with you!
RENEying said…
yOo babe! nice post man! whEe~ u dun hafta bother bout such bastards. it's so polite of u to protect that bastard. hah! aniwaes, rOck On! we'll laugh with u, NOT at u. =D
ping said…
Quote:
"all of us are corporate whores now, discussin the newest industry trends, stock options, who's gettin married, who just bought a new house, who just bought a new car, and all that inane crap. just as often, in those occasional solemn moments, we talk about how fuckin lucky we are, that we are on the right side of the system, the cold unforgivin singapore education system. cos we made single digit points at O lvls, and made it to nus, and graduated with honors. that's why we're sittin here havin the drinks, not behind the bar mixing it"

All i want to say is, shame on you Ian*. This is just the cherry on top.

As a high-flier in civil service, you obviously have not learnt some of the more important lessons in life. Which many of us, on the 'other side' have learnt to embrace in our lives. Values such as humility and empathy perhaps?

So what if we are the service crew attending to your needs as a consumer? It is our job, a career perhaps. It is the path we chose to tread, not because we cannot be like you, but if we all were, who's gonna mix our drinks?

I have a single digit O level results as well. I chose to be in Poly much to the disgust of my friends, like you. Coincidentally, now I am in the retail line nowhere near the glory of an executive or a civil servant.

Am I shameful? NO. I have been living my life to the fullest, not by dreaming of which car I will be purchasing or if I will ever buy a condo with a swimming pool.

Am I glad to be having the drinks at Zouk Wine bar and not making it? Geez.. I always wondered how it was like to be mixing the drinks. Damn you for spoiling my daydreams.
ping said…
i think i went off the handle there, this entry just hit the wrong spot. Anyway, kudos on you for sticking by what you believe in.

cheers!
The Blue Ark said…
This sadly is a fact of society. Some people work hard at school, or are born slightly "smarter" than others, and score great results. (smarter meaning at studying, not at life. IQ, not EQ).

Some of these people start to become arrogant. And especially if they group themselves together, they start to think they have the right to look down on others. In the medivial ages these people go on to start wars and become kings to the 'peasants'.

"I've studied so hard/I'm so fucking smart i must have some way to show it" or something along those lines probably fill their thoughts.

They especially hate the lazy or stupid. (Maybe jealous that they are always so happy? Ignorance is sometimes bliss after all).

What they lack in however, is EQ and emphaty for all human beings. They have effectively put themselves on an island and decided that their island is the best ("the right side") and therefore decided that they should laugh at everyone who isn't on their island.

What they do not know, is that although they can laugh along with everyone else on that island, the whole bloody world is laughing at the island.

Here's a thought. Which life would you rather have?
1) Coporate high flier. Earn's $100k a month. Live in 20 room bungalow. Have 10 cars and 15 maids. High pressure job. Stress hazards. Have to see shrinks, slowly going mad. Have spoilt brat kids.
2) Bum on the street. Pull's in $20 a day playing guitar for passerby's. Live in a cardboard box house. Laughs all day. People love him (except the coporate yuppie who stares at him in disgust). Generally is pretty fucking happy.

Pretty extreme cases, but think about it.
Jane Xie said…
let's see. i do agree that some people in this modernised society's been sloggin' away mindlessly and while there's the fair share of people who do see themselves as the "I-AM-FUGGIN-SMART" bunch, let's not forget that there ARE also the smart n nice people around yeah :)

really hope ya guys dun associate the elite with being snobbish and all cuz most of us aren't. seriously. i duno about the other collges but the people around in my college are still quite warm. yepps.

it's quite a reflective entry i'd say, depicting aptly the elusive society problems...ah wells.

but to me, u're still quite a narcississtic wh0re. haha. but quite a different one i suppose. ;)

it's amazing how u can turn on 2000 people to laugh at u. cool.
lbandit said…
Hi just passing through. Superb post and excellent writing, lov your blog lots. Just ignore those self righteous ba*tard*.
justine said…
Isn't it wonderful how things turn out? You could have shut down your blog and left the 2000 of us readers to wander around with nothing good to read (I'll gush about how much I love your blog and how fucking funny I think you are later).

Ian seems quite the jerk, still there are tons of people like him who turn up their noses at everyone and anyone who isn't like them, yadda yadda, and who doesn't confrom yadda yadda..

Generic enough but I just have to say good on you for being your own person and standing up for yourself!

:x
anoymous said…
hey gurl... hows it goin?

hmm, i'm pretty much my own person. i like your style, prolly one of the many too. heh maybe life's all bout change. i slipped up during my psle too, prelims 265--> play like fark--> actual 230+ went to a neighbourhood sch, but went to a jc anyway, think the jc system sux lots, its elitism left right centre. heh i took many activities in sch, and now at 20 i can sing, cook *ya i took f$n for my actual o's* lol and in a jc they go huh? wads f&n? and continue eating hawker food, get all em horrendous diseases and die poor ahaa...

i'd think that life is about trying, if u havent tried, u havent lived. some ppl draw selfworth from being good at something, others, on the versatility of experience. human beings have thrived till today, because we can adapt, learn, and use a skill for as useful as it is, abandon it when we have to, and learn sumthing else...

human beings are over calculative. its a horrid trait. well, honest to say, i'd think we'd all be happier and healthier in other slacker countries w/ a slower but NOT less successful economy, etc. we all start out nobodies. we end our lives thinking what we've built thru the way. that's erroneous to a fault.

some people judge others too much, assuming every entity in the galaxy must adhere/conform to their beliefs and acheivements. if god makes u a farmer, and your an unhappy coporate magnate how? be a fucking happy farmer lah!! wa lan... =_=' its actually morose to see society crumble on the very values its touted as its building blocks, thou i must stress, its a subtle observation, which makes it all the more deadlier...

funny how the very people who look down on us when we falter, i.e the smartest kid in class who is the teachers pet taunts u over a failed test which he/she aced, saying you shouldnt have gone for that class outing or wadeva occasion, frowns when people show off their new bag or shoes while he/she studies like mad, laughs at all the other 'materialistic people' who arent deep enough to study, fast forward 10 years later, he/she's a coporate elite and suddenly *well there is of cos a slow transient change occuring, too subtle to notice* and there, suddenly, all the values he/she's held true are quite the opposite.

materialism is seldom spearheaded by the bottomline in society, its the top that changes the bottom and this becomes a bell curved distribution. its always the rich/educated that judge, ridicule, give everything a face value. the lower half of society is not so strong-willed and gets 'misguided' and incessantly try to match up.

its the people who can stop and think, take stock, and go 'what the fuck is wrong with all you people?! where IS the love!?' that stand out and make society backtrack and self access itself. we're the dreamers and thinkers in this society, time for an upheaval people... lets get rid/re-educate em emotionally autistic fiends who are the ones who are finally gonna be asking themselves wad their life was worth in the end...

xiaxue u lead!! we follow!! chiong ahhhh!!!!!! *cough* *spit* ahhh!!!!


http://platonicism.blogspot.com/
anoymous said…
hey gurl... hows it goin?

hmm, i'm pretty much my own person. i like your style, prolly one of the many too. heh maybe life's all bout change. i slipped up during my psle too, prelims 265--> play like fark--> actual 230+ went to a neighbourhood sch, but went to a jc anyway, think the jc system sux lots, its elitism left right centre. heh i took many activities in sch, and now at 20 i can sing, cook *ya i took f$n for my actual o's* lol and in a jc they go huh? wads f&n? and continue eating hawker food, get all em horrendous diseases and die poor ahaa...

i'd think that life is about trying, if u havent tried, u havent lived. some ppl draw selfworth from being good at something, others, on the versatility of experience. human beings have thrived till today, because we can adapt, learn, and use a skill for as useful as it is, abandon it when we have to, and learn sumthing else...

human beings are over calculative. its a horrid trait. well, honest to say, i'd think we'd all be happier and healthier in other slacker countries w/ a slower but NOT less successful economy, etc. we all start out nobodies. we end our lives thinking what we've built thru the way. that's erroneous to a fault.

some people judge others too much, assuming every entity in the galaxy must adhere/conform to their beliefs and acheivements. if god makes u a farmer, and your an unhappy coporate magnate how? be a fucking happy farmer lah!! wa lan... =_=' its actually morose to see society crumble on the very values its touted as its building blocks, thou i must stress, its a subtle observation, which makes it all the more deadlier...

funny how the very people who look down on us when we falter, i.e the smartest kid in class who is the teachers pet taunts u over a failed test which he/she aced, saying you shouldnt have gone for that class outing or wadeva occasion, frowns when people show off their new bag or shoes while he/she studies like mad, laughs at all the other 'materialistic people' who arent deep enough to study, fast forward 10 years later, he/she's a coporate elite and suddenly *well there is of cos a slow transient change occuring, too subtle to notice* and there, suddenly, all the values he/she's held true are quite the opposite.

materialism is seldom spearheaded by the bottomline in society, its the top that changes the bottom and this becomes a bell curved distribution. its always the rich/educated that judge, ridicule, give everything a face value. the lower half of society is not so strong-willed and gets 'misguided' and incessantly try to match up.

its the people who can stop and think, take stock, and go 'what the fuck is wrong with all you people?! where IS the love!?' that stand out and make society backtrack and self access itself. we're the dreamers and thinkers in this society, time for an upheaval people... lets get rid/re-educate em emotionally autistic fiends who are the ones who are finally gonna be asking themselves wad their life was worth in the end...

xiaxue u lead!! we follow!! chiong ahhhh!!!!!! *cough* *spit* ahhh!!!!


http://platonicism.blogspot.com/
anoymous said…
hey gurl... hows it goin?

hmm, i'm pretty much my own person. i like your style, prolly one of the many too. heh maybe life's all bout change. i slipped up during my psle too, prelims 265--> play like fark--> actual 230+ went to a neighbourhood sch, but went to a jc anyway, think the jc system sux lots, its elitism left right centre. heh i took many activities in sch, and now at 20 i can sing, cook *ya i took f$n for my actual o's* lol and in a jc they go huh? wads f&n? and continue eating hawker food, get all em horrendous diseases and die poor ahaa...

i'd think that life is about trying, if u havent tried, u havent lived. some ppl draw selfworth from being good at something, others, on the versatility of experience. human beings have thrived till today, because we can adapt, learn, and use a skill for as useful as it is, abandon it when we have to, and learn sumthing else...

human beings are over calculative. its a horrid trait. well, honest to say, i'd think we'd all be happier and healthier in other slacker countries w/ a slower but NOT less successful economy, etc. we all start out nobodies. we end our lives thinking what we've built thru the way. that's erroneous to a fault.

some people judge others too much, assuming every entity in the galaxy must adhere/conform to their beliefs and acheivements. if god makes u a farmer, and your an unhappy coporate magnate how? be a fucking happy farmer lah!! wa lan... =_=' its actually morose to see society crumble on the very values its touted as its building blocks, thou i must stress, its a subtle observation, which makes it all the more deadlier...

funny how the very people who look down on us when we falter, i.e the smartest kid in class who is the teachers pet taunts u over a failed test which he/she aced, saying you shouldnt have gone for that class outing or wadeva occasion, frowns when people show off their new bag or shoes while he/she studies like mad, laughs at all the other 'materialistic people' who arent deep enough to study, fast forward 10 years later, he/she's a coporate elite and suddenly *well there is of cos a slow transient change occuring, too subtle to notice* and there, suddenly, all the values he/she's held true are quite the opposite.

materialism is seldom spearheaded by the bottomline in society, its the top that changes the bottom and this becomes a bell curved distribution. its always the rich/educated that judge, ridicule, give everything a face value. the lower half of society is not so strong-willed and gets 'misguided' and incessantly try to match up.

its the people who can stop and think, take stock, and go 'what the fuck is wrong with all you people?! where IS the love!?' that stand out and make society backtrack and self access itself. we're the dreamers and thinkers in this society, time for an upheaval people... lets get rid/re-educate em emotionally autistic fiends who are the ones who are finally gonna be asking themselves wad their life was worth in the end...

xiaxue u lead!! we follow!! chiong ahhhh!!!!!! *cough* *spit* ahhh!!!!


http://platonicism.blogspot.com/
Derpina Leong said…
XX~ Don't worry if there are people who laugh at you, there will always be more people that are WITH you!! Your blogders will always be at your side!

Think its just the typical life of Singaporeans? Study hard, get a degree and climb the corporate ladder. After 40 years of living and 20 years of working, you get retrenched and you have nothing again. At least you have took the other path and you won't have the same experience like the average Singaporeans! =)
Ivan said…
Er folks, I am a little happy at the outpouring of support, but could I appeal to everyone to please check and make sure that your comments are up before posting again? The multiple posts are starting to get a little irritating...

Hai~Ren
Fisher said…
Bravo to your recent three entries. Especially the last, I like the flow of the entry development, slowly and finally reaching the climax of posting idoitic "lan" mail! Ha! That cuteass is sure piss/paisei as hell now with all the bashing from you/them.

Normal days I'll only read and laugh [with] you, but today I'm here to second your opinion that going to jc is still the prefer/best choice for students nowadays. I'm earning my bucks in society now not by my poly cert but on my other merits. If I have to depend on my cert to get a job, I might have to save like shit till 45 then I can get married with my gf, with my own place, furniture, king size bed, car and toiletries... Unless the polys managment wake up from their comfort salaries to improve their education directions and systems, many more poly grads out there will be bypassed. Not everyday theres a Sim Wong Hoo comes along, stop using his name to brag and welcome kids to poly!

Opps, I could have wrote more but I'll rather save it for my coffeeshop trips with my friends...

To end,
I read you like a flower, florish and blossom with each days go by... Gd day...



Fan,
Fisher
Ashton said…
Bravo, Xiaxue.
Bravo.
heartw|sh* said…
i salute you for sticking to what you believe in: yourself.
Darke Magick said…
Ian sounds like a snob to me. Someone who prides himself on being an intellect and being educated and looks down on less smart people. His idea of 'friends' is so bloody @#$%^&*(

I hate how some people automatically assumes that just because you talk about mundane, everyday things instead of big politics and grand ideas, you are a simple-minded, shallow person.

Someone who is intellectual need not flaunt his knowledge all the time. He's secure in his knowledge, he knows he is smart; and if he chooses to talk about celebrities and the like, it doesn't make him less smart as a person.

Only insecure people feels a need to constantly put down people. And his ego must be the size of a full-stop if he feels a need to hurt his FRIEND.

I think he's hiding the security blanket that he's smarter than you, yadda yadda yadda, he talk about big grand concepts instead of brinjals and mee sua, but to me he just sounds fake.

His success is a hollow success, and I feel sorry for him that he feels that his life is fortunate. Working his butt off in a nine-to-five job, worrying about the 5Cs, always having to watch his step just in case his boss fire him, balancing office politics - if that's his idea of a fortunate life, that guy's obviously a frog in the well (chinese proverb)

And if he thinks his life is fortunate not because of this but because of the money he earns, that makes him even a bigger loser.

- Alixues, who resides on Livejournal but regularly reads your entries =D. And she happens to find them fucking brilliant too.
viv said…
looking at the bazillion comments here, you should have your own forum webbie.
Ned Stark said…
Well i oso cant stand those type of think they damn pro damn smart damn this damn that kind of people...act big only ....to be interacting with this kind of people everday really stinks and sometimes outsiders will think ur one of them and thats worse....

Aniwae good reply although u should just put his name down...the world has too many of these sorts of elitist snobs and someone should put them in their place :)
Dark`Angl said…
Hi xiaxue,
been following ur entries since few months ago and i must say, it's a habit to read daily, awaiting for ur updates =) Ur style is unique, don't ever let anyone change that :D
Luckily, you trusted your instincts back then not to shut down your blog and follow your heart. Don't ever let annyone set you back in life. Your fellow supporters (including me) will always be behind you all the way.
Btw, your blog has always been a hot topic btw my bf and I. ;)
And I will always laugh WITH you, not AT you.
*Ian, if you are reading this comment board, please note the fact that you had the priviledge to befriend such a lovely, witty and humorous young lady. To you: MAY YOUR BOSS FIND OUT HOW ARROGANT YOU ARE THROUGH THIS BLOG AND PROBABLY SACK YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR WARPED CHARACTER. Goodness gracious, you and your circle of elistists friends are a disgrace to the entire human race.
阿顺 said…
Sorry for the ??????

I was saying Ian is a bastard.
Wei Yuan said…
I tot i'll nvr be making a comment.
But i need to say this.

U R A BITCH, XIAXUE.

But a lovely one.

Nvr thought i'll b so looking forward to the daily dosage of ur amusingly funny posts.

Aniwae. I'm glad u were smarter than Mr Great-Graduate Ian to not close this site.

Rock on!
cherry said…
hey xiaxue! that ian is just a mother fucker bastard who thinks oh so highly about himself.. He only go NUS, his bloody head so fucking big.. If he go harvard, i think he'll demand everyone to kiss the ground he step on..

If this LOSER ian ever read this blog, just have a word for you "FUCK OFF MEN NERD" Such a dork.. Sadist!

Anyway, xiaxue, u know we'll always support u! becoz u r who u r. And you are not ashamed to be the real u! not like someone..who'll pull down friends like this. HE WILL HAVE RETRIBUTION. Let us look forward to tt day. *smiles
Contradictories said…
Xx, you almost made me cry with that blog entry. I love ya for the pride that you have! Ian must have scored zero for his moral education in school!
Moof said…
All the best and keep up the writing!
cottonlamb said…
hi,

I really admire your style of writing. Got to know your blog from straits times =) and since the day i visited your blog, i cannot resist following up your posts. Guess there's many many people telling you this already! nvm! one more won't hurt rite?

i like this particular entry very much. it speaks from my perspective too, and it takes a bold heart and a good writer to pen these out.

keep up the good blog!
Dopey said…
hi, this is my first ever comment on yr site. have been following it for quite some time but this blog abt ian really made me want to say something! he's really one of the shallowest person i've ever heard of, and i do believe such a person exists (have met similar ones myself). and your rebuke couldn't have been better! i hope that ian, his 'so-called' friends and his BOSS reads it! n i hope u aren't negatively affected by this incident, keep blogging! that's your strength! :)
cheers, fran (http://florecitos.blogspot.com)
Kai said…
Jeez� am I pissed. What a classic example of a snobbish elitist brat. Fuck his big time honours. It's such a shame, along the academic route; Mr. 'I'm-on-the-right-side-of-the-fuckin-system' didn't pick up a little humility and a dash of humour. He wouldn't have need to visit a shrink. He could have just saved the money and buy a comic book.

'That's why we're sittin here havin the drinks, not behind the bar mixing it' just smacks of arrogance and narrow-mindedness. Damn. I could have driven a Flaming Lamborghini up his ass.

*Don't let that brat get u down, Wendy. He'd probably get erectile dysfunction someday. Most snotty corporate whores like him do. :)
Dopey said…
sorry, another comment, just wanted to add,
he's such a loser, telling u not to publish the letter on yr blog... i mean... who's he to say that to you... it's yr blog after all!
what a sore loser!
hmmm on the other hand, maybe he just doesn't know what he wants in this life... or he's soo totally confused by why people would choose to read the blog of someone without a uni degree as compared to someone like him! (pitiful guy manz...)
Gum said…
God. At last, the post that makes me weep. *sniffs*

Hey Fellow Blogders!

Celebrate the Blogs having more than ONE MILLON VIEWS!!!

Woot! We have at last passed the Millionth mark!

Gratz Xiaxue!!!
lotise said…
Of all the feelings conjured by this post, i feel inspired the most. Weird. Blog on!
enenmon said…
?????????~ ????????????????????
?????????????????????????????????????????
???????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????
????????????????????????????????????????????????~
?~~~~~
wen said…
i'm a new blogder of yours and have been visiting your blog recently. I really envy your skills but also feel very sorry for you to have such a "friend" opps i should not say friend. am really sorry that you have such a dog. forget about lan the dog, treat it as feeding the dog on the street. you have so many supporter out there, so dont because of lan that you give up blogging.
mg said…
He has discovered that life is beginning to become boring, but he does not understand why. He thinks that financial stability equates to happiness, and that your position in life is your own fault/responsibility. He also believes that someone in a position below his own has no right to happiness. He is hypersensitive about his place in society, worried about how acquaintances think about him in the recesses of their minds. He does not understand the functionality and nuances of systems other than one similar to his own, and along with miscomprehension follows disdain.

He will never be happy, for a closed mind cannot understand its true position.
dumbass said…
Recently CBS apologized for a report on George Bush, which evident turned out to be forgery. Mind you it was the web bloggers who first questioned the authenticity of the letter traced back to Bush�s military record. While the main stream medium jumped on the band wagon for the discovery, many pundits ponders on the impact of this �revolution�, led by the nobody bloggers, causing an embarrassment of the establishment and power that may be. Some people opined back when the internet was still at its infant, that the power of the internet, compounded with the free flowing exchanges of information, will ultimate leads to the shift in the power structure, from how news are finally disseminated, covered, government reacted and policies formed as a result. As far as most are concerned, this is still a far fetch dream, but it is not difficult to imagine the power the internet media has brought to the commoner, you and I.

However, lest for one second we think that this power bestowed upon us is limitless. Because with the novelty wears off, many of us bloggers will be back to our daily grinding and worst yet, torture chamber we have chosen to be in. Bath in the short and temporary fame, for it is what you deserved. But do not think this will last, and do not think that a blogger can be a real �somebody� without real contribution to the society we individually chose to be in. Watch out, for if you are not careful, your 15 minutes of glory will be up.
racife said…
Xx - You're on a roll!

Nice post, but i'm still interested in an university education though... for the knowledge part... but who's gonna believe me?

I'll remember not to be such a prick like Ian though.

Congrats on 1 million hits!
Watch the World said…
xiaxue... sometimes you read back at the 72 comments that your reader posted... its like... you could run for president one day.

T_T~
The terrible price one has to pay sometimes for the choices we make. Friendship or popularity? Only the problem becomes complicated when sometimes we don't even get to choose. Our talents and gifts suddenly make room for us without our realising it, and we are pushed down a deep pool without even learning how to swim. Deep inside, we may really want to choose friendship, but amidst the chaotic mayhem of gossip and malice, people get misunderstoond, communication is lost, and good intentions melt. But that is exactly the time when we come to realise who our friends really are, who are the ones who really stand by us in the fiery furnace of testing. I personally find blogging an extremely overbearing experience, psychologically. Mind you, I love writing too. I love it enough to die for it. But my problem is, how much do I want to reveal my actual thoughts without offending anyone? Blogging stretches the eternal tension between respecting public decorum and expressing personal passions. I crumble under the weight of this tension, having stopped blogging for some time. But I admire you for your courage, your honesty. In life, one must choose, and live with one's choices.
The terrible price one has to pay sometimes for the choices we make. Friendship or popularity? Only the problem becomes complicated when sometimes we don't even get to choose. Our talents and gifts suddenly make room for us without our realising it, and we are pushed down a deep pool without even learning how to swim. Deep inside, we may really want to choose friendship, but amidst the chaotic mayhem of gossip and malice, people get misunderstoond, communication is lost, and good intentions melt. But that is exactly the time when we come to realise who our friends really are, who are the ones who really stand by us in the fiery furnace of testing. I personally find blogging an extremely overbearing experience, psychologically. Mind you, I love writing too. I love it enough to die for it. But my problem is, how much do I want to reveal my actual thoughts without offending anyone? Blogging stretches the eternal tension between respecting public decorum and expressing personal passions. I crumble under the weight of this tension, having stopped blogging for some time. But I admire you for your courage, your honesty. In life, one must choose, and live with one's choices.
ENOCH JEKEH said…
What~? He's a sad sad sad little man, he's seeing a shrink is he ?
-You write on girl ~ I love your style..
u've inspired me to write again though my logs are crappy and boring.. I shall write on ~
spatick said…
Dear Mr Ian, I guess by now even an extinct dodo bird 6 feet under the ground would realize he has been pw3nd, so maybe you would have realized that by now as well.

I shall not be bothered with explaining why you are a moron since your email already exemplifies it clearly, as does the 80 odd entries which you may wish to slowly digest.

If you watch the movies at all,ie, the character Ben Stiller plays in Dodgeball, you may get an inkling of what you have portrayed yourself to be. Congratulations to you, you are now infamous as your warped and flawed logic about success, your utter disregard for friendship and your pathetic insecurity has been revealed to, as I put it to you modestly, �quite a sizable number of people�. Thank your lucky stars that XX took into account the former friendship and teacher-student relationship that you had, even though you chose (foolishly I might add) to disregard it manifestly, and chose to spare you by using a pseudonym for you instead of your real name. I put it to you bluntly that you would be �FINISHED� if she had chosen to publish you real identity. Her courage in airing her views frankly in public is in stark contrast to your pathetic attempt at raining low blows upon her, out of malicious spite and blind jealousy. You may think she has played �unfair� by airing out the email that you would �appreciate to be between the 2 of you�, but, just ask yourself whether you were being fair when you chose to totally disregard her feelings when you slagged her and her blog off, causing her undue distress, since unlike you she does treasure friendships and feelings. As a supposed friend and teacher, you should be encouraging her during her tough times, not putting her down. In short, you had this coming and you brought this upon yourself.

Good luck to your future endeavours. I hope you wake up from your self-denial soon. The support shown by both her true friends such as shianux and by people who don�t even know her personally but via her blog is testament to her power. In contrast, no amount of your whoring in the corporate world or whatever other fields you may be whoring in, would you be able to conjure up such backing. Please try to wake up and realize that this form of media is increasingly potent and XX is one of the pioneers who recognizes and knows how to harness its power. This, my friend, thrashes your empty material �inane crap� hands down. I doubt if your supposed �zouk wine bar friends� would acknowledge or back up what you have just said about her in your email, because your �Zouk wine bar friends� are probably as anal retentive as you, and are probably the fair weathered friends type who would probably shit on you if you ever fall off the precarious ladder you are now dangling on.

Have a nice day, get yourself some laxatives if need be.
Anonymous said…
I think the one millionth mark should be good enough to shut people like Dumbass up, but I guess I was wrong ;)
Bluestar said…
That NUS chap is indeed a bastard AND a loser. So wat if he has honours or whatsoever? He is still a LOSER with zero EQ.
Zen|th said…
Well, a friend like that is not worth having. I, like you, treasure loyalty above most things in a friendship and I'd do the exact same thing you did. Without loyalty, what kind of friendship would that be?

I'm glad you got rid of trash like him and didn't shut down your blog or else we all wouldn't be here reading all the interesting and humourous entries that you write so well. =)
BabeRoo said…
Have you read the book The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho? There's a quote "when you really want something, the whole universe will conspires to give it to you". I believe that all things happen to make what you are today. The lousy results in sch, the meeting of a friends (Ian), the start of a blog, the ending of friendship and finally being an exceptionally real and articulate blogger.

The first time i read your blog, i think you are an extremely vain, proud and lian girl. I still think you are vain and lian but i no longer think u are proud. You are simply more confident and self-assured in your talents and your place in this world.
darkstar.87 said…
hmm... this entry had really given me a lot of points to ponder about the Singaporean society...

anyway, he should understand that there is more to life than cars, money, power, etc...

p.s. after reading his email for 3 times, i still don't understand what is his point of sending you that email... to suck up to you perhaps...
chinesetycoon said…
wow since when all the comments are so damn long , like composition?
I shall write one too. ^_^

I think it's exaggerate to call him a bastard, or comment that he bring shame to NUS by what he had done. Maybe girls like to exaggerate. :� I just think guy & gals think differently.

If a group of my friends say something bad about a particular friend say A, I might try to convince them that A is not such a bad person, but if failed, I will just stop trying. (I feel that since I know A is good will do.) Guy just hate trouble, and to us is such a freaking small issue, we just feel there is no points arguing.

Just like a guy order a coffee, and came a cup of tea, guy will just think "arg fuck it since I drink tea too, dun bother to ask for a change" But gal will insist to change for coffee, just to show that they got view. Just a example guy & gal view thing diffly.

On the issue that he request Wendy to shutdown the blog site, I would like to think in a more positive way. If I got a sister who blog, and I know there are alot of people who read and think badly of her (bitch , slut , whore ...etc), since I can;t convince them, I will ask her to stop writing too, in order to protect her.

I dun understand what is the big deal of doing that, maybe the way (ask to shut down) of protection is wrong, just like parent dun allow kid to stay out late. Maybe you feel is wrong, but the reactions is abit extreme, from the comments, I thot that guy is a series rapist, terriorist who killed hundred of kid in russia.. but after I read what he had done, I pity him.

What the hell he had done to deserve this? ????
EteRnaLD said…
**********Xiaxue's No.1 Blogder**********

Sorry Wendy, havent been commenting or playing solitare with you lately. But rest assured your num 1 has been reading faithfully your every entry since May 03 k. Will catch up with u asap.

But i buey ta han, want to comment on this ass. I think i know who he is.

I think i dun need to repeat much of what has already been said but this guy is simply too arrogant. I hope you forward my message to him.

"So what if you are a Honors degree grad. I too am one and on the Faculty's Dean's list as well. But so? You dun see me adopting your high and mighty attitude. Dun be too smug about it. True success is not the measure of your education level but what you have made in life. Let me tell you one thing. You are NOTHING, if you do not accomplish anything with your degree. The same goes for anyone. A degree doesnt mean you have done well in life. No, that is just pure ignorance.

Like you said, without what you have earned, you could be behind that bar counter and not drinking with what your dollars have gotten you. But need i remind you, that if you are so good as you bragged about, you should been owning the place (the bar/pub/disco) which honors degree grads PAY to get in?

Reflect upon it. A truely successful person is not when you tremble at every thought your boss thinks of you. If his opinion of you can be influenenced by your circle of friends, then...doesnt it show how "Valuable" you really are? Get a grip of yourself. Honors degree grad? Plenty. Success in life? You? HA! Try to at least make your boss tremble at the prospect of you resigning first."

*******************************************
invis said…
Hey Xiaxue! Well I admit I've been reading your blog entries since about a month ago, pretty much because I felt it was funny and bitchy in that humorous yet intellectual way... *wink*

But after reading the latest entries, I'm really beginning to admire your character and see your blog as something more than just paragraphs and paragraphs of words that make me laugh in front of my computer everyday... This blog makes me think and reflect about many things, and most of the time i couldn't agree anymore with you! Way to go~

Well that Ian was simply such a jerk... I almost felt like hurling something to my computer screen but I felt that it wasn't worth damaging my computer for such a bastard. =)

If his boss knew about this, I bet he'll fire him right away... who would want a worker with such a bad attitude? (And besides, he even needs a shrink... hmmm~) So what if he graduated with honours? Your life and happiness cannot be determined with just a single sheet of paper right?

I hope he rots in Zouk and gets thrown out by the bartender or something... And by the way your reply to him was fabulous! *claps*

But he, this clever and brilliant ex-nus honours student, probably won't understand your "simple english", huh?

Let's hope he'll get his shrink to patiently explain to him what you mean in the letter while persuading him to eat his medicine...

Or better still, just lock him up in the asylum yah? That'll do the job... ^^

PS: Is it just me, or are your comments increasing rapidly? Many people are creating accounts just to comment here, from what I've observed... Man, Xiaxue you're becoming a celebrity in the virtual world... hahaz~

http://invis88.blogspot.com
cherry said…
well, i'm not here to say whose side i'm on, whether it's Xiaxue's fault or "Ian"'s fault or to call "Ian" names.

what i'm here to say is:

xiaxue, at least you know that the posts on your blog are 100% your thoughts and feelings on matters that you have experienced yourself. be happy to know that the posts weren't fictitious or attention seeking. (: i applaud your open-mindedness in singapore. you're a rare gem.

you've already had countless insults and snide remarks hurled at you from so many of your blogders, holding strong against this one 'ian' wouldn't be too tough now, would it? (:

besides, i love your blog(:
summertingz said…
well done, wendy! *thumb up*
I love yr blog it's always so real and true abt yr own thots and feelings it's never once fake...
*smiles*
Psycho Diva said…
Number 90. Hmm doubt that asshole can garner so much support even if his life depended on it.

I think that description of him being like Ben Stiller in Dodgeball is excellent. He is the kind of moron that thinks that he is so great, but really everyone just thinks he is a really disgusting exhibit of conceit.

As much as many of us blogders don't know you personally, but i guess those who really read your blog with an open mind would know that you have always been true in what you write. And through your brutally honest writings, we have come to know you, admire you, and love you. I guess not much of the people who know Ian really like him very much.

Although one asshole chose to give up your friendship, i hope you take comfort in the fact that you still have many other friends here at xiaxue.blogspot.com, and we will stand up for you any day! We will probably slap whoever besmirches your name with a piece of rotten char-siew (ahhh plagarism! Don't sue me please!) then stuff it into their mouths. Mwahaha~

Anyway, i think it was a stroke of good luck that you got to see the real side of that jerk. He has been put throught the test of fire, and he has failed miserably. You should be glad you got rid of the parasite.

Last but not least, WE LOVE YOU XIAXUE! BLOG ON!
Haha big hugs :D
Psycho Diva said…
Number 90. Hmm doubt that asshole can garner so much support even if his life depended on it.

I think that description of him being like Ben Stiller in Dodgeball is excellent. He is the kind of moron that thinks that he is so great, but really everyone just thinks he is a really disgusting exhibit of conceit.

As much as many of us blogders don't know you personally, but i guess those who really read your blog with an open mind would know that you have always been true in what you write. And through your brutally honest writings, we have come to know you, admire you, and love you. I guess not much of the people who know Ian really like him very much.

Although one asshole chose to give up your friendship, i hope you take comfort in the fact that you still have many other friends here at xiaxue.blogspot.com, and we will stand up for you any day! We will probably slap whoever besmirches your name with a piece of rotten char-siew (ahhh plagarism! Don't sue me please!) then stuff it into their mouths. Mwahaha~

Anyway, i think it was a stroke of good luck that you got to see the real side of that jerk. He has been put throught the test of fire, and he has failed miserably. You should be glad you got rid of the parasite.

Last but not least, WE LOVE YOU XIAXUE! BLOG ON!
Haha big hugs :D
Psycho Diva said…
Aiyah sorry for the double post~ Bad impatient little me :P
doubleUei said…
somehow.. can feel what u're feeling at that point of time.. =) cheer up yeahs? at least u got to know blogders like eternalD.. your no. 1 blogder.. =) rock on !
TITANS THREE! said…
you shouldn't protect that bastard manx... Should have just printed his blardy name. Frankly renaming him Ian is gonna make all those Ians out there wail in agony. Oh my God... What credit. Who claims credit for telling someone to start a blog and helping him/her out with it. If anyone is phoney it's him. Some times I wonder if it's wrong to be different and I do blog about that when I start thinking. But if everyone writes in the same way, why would anyone want to read anything? I am so glad you didn't listen to his blardy 'advice' which is more like shit if you ask me. ANd what is with WRONG side of the system... Or in his words 'other side'. Polytechnic or JC... What difference does it make. As long as you make it big where you are. So he's just in the stupid corporate world with his useless common cert and waving it around expects to get a nice cushy job cos he ended up in the 'right' side of the system. Eat shit lah. Can't stand his one track mind. I'm glad you published his letter. He totally stereotypes all those uni grads man... I pity those university grads... Ruin their names with his lousy attitude to life. He should just bang his head against a wall and seek help. He does visit a shrink right? YEAH. COS HE NEEDS ONE. ARGHH. Oh right... And I really enjoy reading your blog. I rather read all your blog entries than ONE BLARDY LOUSY SAD blog entry which just talks like every other entry from a million other blogs.

-carrie another one of those xiaxue fans out there
TulanMing said…
The "system" isn't to blame. having come from "his side" of the "system", i have no idea why he thought the way he did. It makes no sense at all.

I have to disagree with you on one point though. having 2000 readers a day doesnt really make you somebody. Don't let your estimation of your own worth be based on a trivial thing as that...With or without this blog, you are somebody amazing. Your true friends are what really matters. Not faceless,virtual fans like us. We dont matter. Those who are around you do. And ya, "Ian" probably deserved all these for letting you down at that point of time. Not only letting you down by not defending you but he actually turned against you. Hard to forgive.

Guessed you must be hurting now too ? :)You had your revenge. Probably enough is enough.

Hopefully someday you two will be friends again.
cHug said…
damn... that's like, whacked...
from how i see it, you got urself a geniune product of singapore education... pressed, rigid, efficient, mindless and most importantly disposeable... he definately needs a shrink...
dont fret about him so much... ur govenment need ppl like him anyway... if everybody in government was so bloody good then there wouldnt be anybody to blame when something fucks up... hahaha
anyways just chill & blog on =)


i-got-no-blog.blogspot.com
johnisfriend said…
well i am just a nobody reading this blog,, somehow ffels like saying something after reading this recent blog . from my point of view, maybe that ian is bastard alright in thew past, but did try to catch your attention by writing a message, maybe he is remorse, or watever, but u publicly show wat he write is really cruel ;/. know wat i mean? everyone will stand on your side when u critise someone in your blog, ends up cursing that guy or gal. i just feels is morally incorrect to do this. ;/

yeah i talking crap ;p and everyone in this blog will curse me like they curse ian. i dun care ;p just saying my bit, remember, john= friend . 88
Vera said…
You go Girl!

You're being too nice to that bastard! Please post his blog so we all can go read him!...wait.. no that will increase his traffic! He's giving us NUS grads a bad name! Bloody bastard!

Oh yeah, I'm laughing WITH you!!
Gum said…
Yeah! We are all Laughing WITH YOU!!!

Ian* is dead wrong. (Perhaps only those puny few on his side may be laughing at you, but hey. Let them be the frog, nay... toads, under the well.)
Sabby said…
Hey Girl, I think you should set up a fan club soon. judging from the responses you got ;)
Having studied masscomm at NP, I'm always impressed by the way you write - engaging the audience & being "yourself". I've linked you up on my blog because I totally admire your personality. I've got friends who read your blog (after seeing the link on my webbie) and tell me, "She's so fake!" and "She's so bitchy!"... and yet they proclaim their admiration for your photoshop skills. What I want to point out is that there's no perfect person in the world, and the more people love you, the more others will hate you.

Hate you for daring to be different, love you for daring to be different.

So stay the way you are, because there are a lot of people who love and support your blog because you are YOU. Don't let anyone bring your confidence down!!
deborah said…
Wendy,

Everytime I read your blog, it's became one inspirational journey, time and again. I have to say, I <3 it absolutely! Honestly, I think you've got a flair in writing and I mean it. =)

So, ignore that loser and get on with your life. After all, what's one minority against the majority? ;)
at82 said…
Hi i a uni student (not at NUS though lol) and have been reading this blog for about 2 months. Usually i juz read and that that is it but after reading this entry i decided to create a blog juz to comment.

Well I have to say Ian is horrible. He was downright elitist, his comments on the "right" of the sys sound juz like what our Minister Mentor said years ago about the high IQ of the graduates will have IQ children. He and friends sterotyping of people less educated than them is totally disgusting. He is also an F**ker in the way he forsake his friends for "face". His non-existent intergrity says much about him.

However xiaxue pls dun go the level as low as him. By sterotyping uni grad and civil servants as elitist and useless doesn't do justice to either them or yourself. You are committing the same mistake as the so-called elite by doing so. You didn't want ppl to judge you with a piece of paper, neither the uni student and civil servants want to judge by their jobs and studies.

I am sure you are a talent person but i also sure that there are people in civil service that are not just paper pusher and uni students who are not elitist at all. By thinking u are a somebody and thus can look down on others who are not as successful, u are not being much better than Ian.

I am sure you can rise above that. Success shouldn't be judged by how many 'A's you got in the exam but neither it should depend on how many hit your blog have. It shouldn't be that superficial. I am sure you are worth much more as a person than the hits your blog have.

I think i am gg to get flame by others. But hell who cares. By the way i truely enjoyed your blog and love your style of writing. And i am laughing WITH you not at you. Keep up the gd work ;)
cheers said…
Hmmm, we only saw the whole situation from your point of view, but wat about Ian's point of view? Of coz, it being ur blog, it will tend to be bias ain't it, with all the emotions u're pouring in whilst writing the entry. Maybe we shldn't be so judgemental, as you have been, quick as u are to judge others. Perhaps we should also let Ian have his say. Just as u are, so arrogant wif your now characteristic 269 as you've been so ardously protecting the onli identity of 269. heheh.
Anonymous said…
To Cheers: Of course we're seeing things from Xx's point of view. If I want to hear others' point of view, then I'll should be elsewhere reading their blogs instead ;)
dweam said…
I think it's pretty obvious from all the comments for the entry, the loss of a so-called friend, is pretty much worth it. There are people in life who are not worth having. Sure some might say that he was the one who got you started on blogging, but he was merely "leading out" the talent you already had in you. He could have introduced blogging to someone else too, but would they have made it as good as Xiaxue did? I doubt so, unless they had TALENT.

It's obvious that he was jealous (everyone can see that) and he should be more than ASHAMED of himself. One's character should not be judged by the instituition they attended but by their actions and words. Big deal if he's a U grad, having a degree doesnt make you successful or happy. Being happy is doing what you want, and what you have a passion for. Xiaxue obviously is happy where she is now. The paths she took might not have been the orthodox route and time to time she might in retrospect wonder whether she made the right decisions, but she loves writing and what could be better in life than doing what you LOVE. Rather than slogging it out doing something you hate but pays the bills. Is our purpose in life to make lots of money? Something we cant being with us when we leave this mortal world? Or is our purpose to live life to the fullest and know that you led a fulfilling life before passing on?
The smartest of people or the ones with the highest degrees might not be the ones who became successful in the game called LIFE. In fact, some of the biggest businessmen dont hold honours or paper qualifications. They just had a stroke of genius.

To xiaxue, stay true to yourself and keep blogging. You know there's a whole host of people who are behind you no matter what. Three cheers to Xiaxue!!
Arissa said…
And that was 1 million hits for xiaxue. It does prove something does it? write a post to commemorate ur millionth hit. say something~ we wanna listen.
V said…
Conclusions drawn from reading thus far (my eyes are about to pop from staring at the pink background for the last hour or so):


1) i think Ian has no friends. (not true ones, at least. if he had any to begin with.)

2) i think Blogger has Xiaxue to thank for the increased membership... lol... so many sign up just to post comments

3) agree with most of what everyone else has said... betrayal stings, and this is coming from my own experience. i really related to this entry.

4) i think that whatever route we choose in life doesn't matter, as long as at the end of the day, we can go to sleep each night with a clear conscience. of course, knowing what direction to head in also matters.

5) thank god you didn't listen to him. or i would have been bored to tears while skiving on my holiday job. LOL.

6) keep writing, babe. this entry is a milestone in the history of xiaxue.blogspot.com. ;)
Gum said…
Hey, let's not argue with the Lowly One (Ian*)

You will definately lose, why?

Cos they will bring you down to their level, and then beat you with experience.

Heh.
icewinter said…
Frankly, what's with the implicit obsession with NUS? Some of us seem to hold NUS in such high regard. Yes, it might be the best university in S'pore (even this claim is suspect), but an NUS degree is only worth where NUS is - Singapore. Anywhere else, it has a market value of 2 cents - which is pretty much the same as any other degree from Congo, Adis Ababa or Zambia. Heck, I think I would give more credit to these other degrees simply by virtue of a student making it through these unforgiving locations!

Let us not be inward-looking crustaceans. Wow at Harvard & Yale. Ogle at Stanford & Princeton. Be impressed by MIT. Envy Oxbridge. There are many more. Ask Donald Trump or Bill Gates or Kofi Annan what's NUS and you would probably get a big "HUH?".

Which brings me back to the purpose of my post:

Ian is from NUS. So?
Zan said…
Though the entry was long, the story was honest and great... sad to hear that you had met up such people. In fact i do know there are many such jokers around and sympathise with you.

Anyway i was referred by a friend who told me that your blog had appeared in the papers, so i decided to take a lookie.

Now i know why it is the most read blog. Keep blogging! :)
shanna said…
SHITHOLES MANN! not all bartenders are bartenders cos they cant succeed academically.. if you ask me, he's a dead straight thinking guy whose only following the mainstream.. bartenders do have interest for drinks IAN! doubt you couldn carry it off even if you wanted to.. dumb ass..
clownz said…
Long blog? Fug that shit.. i think it made for a really good read. Albeit a little one sided, but hey, Ian sounds like a suck ass "Friend" .. so screw him and his whiny little email. Deserves to be published...

Mark
http://clownzmeis.blogspot.com
Pawarit said…
fuck the mutha ass fucka...wat "right" side of the system?wat fuck logic....though im on it,but i feel shit...its not right at all though!i've met countless impressive figures who did not go thru the mainstream and were nv on the "right" side....fuck u ian government doggy
Andrea Ng said…
Hi i think thats true courage you've shown , courage to stick up for your ideas , to defent yourself. :) nice. i really admire that.
Oh...I can't help myself...can't stop myself... CHINESE TYCOON URE A MORON!!!A idiot more like it, actually. Xiaxue's " good friend" DID NOT think to himself "I feel that since I know A is good will do":

That good friend AGREED that xiaxue is NOT good. An ultimatum? �childish� and distasteful manner? is scared that his future boss might see that he is associated with her? To decide to pretend not to know her, should they meet on the streets one day? sounds like he think xiaxue is good? Do you tell someone her writing is childish and distasteful when you want to protect her? No, you tell her it is a bad idea to draw flack, not insult and demean her. Do you really think he wanted to protect her at all? He agreed with his friends!

girls like to exaggerate? HELLO, THE PEOPLE calling that guy a basterd are made up of GUYS as well.

DON'T say these "logic"s of dumbasses like you are "guy's way of thinking", insulting all my guy friends. Incredible hulking idiot, insult somemore?

I doubt you can even understand my words or get my points when you misread xiaxue so completely. There must have been whole sentences you skipped or didn't understand.
Xiaxue said…
Jelly,

There will always be people like that. It's ok. As I said, to be a writer is to be misinterpreted.

As for this blog entry, I must say that the amount of people who misinterpreted is less.

However to everyone else here:

I must clarify that the point of the entry is not that Ian is a bastard, just because he looks down on the people on "the other side".

The point of this entry is:

1) I am shocked that people forgo friendship for social statuses! and change from 1 great, nice person to one cold heartless person. That's why the blog entry consisted of the friendship before the quarrel instead of just the email exchanges.

2) To tell Ian that the blog which he deemed to be disgraceful is now a great hit - and he can just suck my cock.
CherryTomato said…
yo! very nice entry... love the quote "They laugh at me because I am different, but I laugh at them because they are all the same."
chinesetycoon said…
To Jelly only !!!

quote :Oh...I can't help myself...can't stop myself... CHINESE TYCOON URE A MORON!!!A idiot more like it, actually. Xiaxue's " good friend" DID NOT think to himself "I feel that since I know A is good will do":

Ans: I am sorry Jelly ,i should not shove the cucumber into your ass
Hmmm did I? Nope I didn't right? Why are you reacting so badly? Can't you talk nicely without swearing? ^^

quote:That good friend AGREED that xiaxue is NOT good. An ultimatum? ?hildish?and distasteful manner? is scared that his future boss might see that he is associated with her? To decide to pretend not to know her, should they meet on the streets one day? sounds like he think xiaxue is good? Do you tell someone her writing is childish and distasteful when you want to protect her? No, you tell her it is a bad idea to draw flack, not insult and demean her. Do you really think he wanted to protect her at all? He agreed with his friends!

Ans:Ok I admit I miss the part he refuse to convince his friend, and fear his boss know about .....Becos I already been warned of the long entry. I thot he will at least try, that's why I speak up for him.

quote:girls like to exaggerate? HELLO, THE PEOPLE calling that guy a basterd are made up of GUYS as well.

DON'T say these "logic"s of dumbasses like you are "guy's way of thinking", insulting all my guy friends. Incredible hulking idiot, insult somemore?

ans: you just prove that I am right saying girls like to exaggerate, you can simply say most of your guy friend are not like that. My example are insulting to all your guy friend? Exaggerate rite? and I might not be perfect gentleman, but definitely not a incredible hulking idiot.


quote:I doubt you can even understand my words or get my points when you misread xiaxue so completely. There must have been whole sentences you skipped or didn't understand.

Ans: pls stop behaving & typing as thou you are XX, as if you are her. You are no where near her, she might sound bitchy, but at least she is humorous(that's why I read her blog). Since you can't accept opionion diff from your, then I shall stop posting my comment hardcore readers like you dun like to read.

I shall post comment acceptable here. "Yeah Ian is a idiot, He should have killed all the friends who criticised this blog site"
Satisfied?


Quote:They laugh at me because I am different, but I laugh at them because they are all the same

I like this quote too, but too bad most hardcore readers like Jelly cannot understand this. Those who are different will be called a moron/bastard/idiot/dumbass without fail. My interpretation from reading might be diff from yr, but that does not make me an idiot or dumb S...etc Why can't you simply discuss nicely? Instead of barking like a mad dog? : (
Xiaxue said…
Aiyoh don't quarrel lah ... :(
Unknown said…
hey wendy, chill. some relations are there once in our lives, and will be lost when the time arises. don't fret too much.
sleepyhead said…
God, you are too funny!

Not sure if this entry would have made Mr Professor cry with despair or indignation, but it sure made me cry, for completely different reasons. It made me cry with laughter, if you can believe that.

You are a real intellectual!

Blog on.
squashybabe said…
tt guy's such an idiot. damn him. newae.. rock on gurl! =)
Emily said…
That stupid "Ian" person should eat crap and suck his BOSS balls.

Pathetic, superficial imbecile who judges people when he don't even know them well.

Way to go Xia Xue!
Janan said…
Is it really so hard to forgive Wendy?

I somehow pity your ex-friend Ian.

Now that your situation and his are in a certain sense reversed, should you not show the magnomosity to let things be whilst he never stood up for you?

That would make you even greater morally.

You're not wrong in what you replied to him, but I do think it could have been phrased in a more polite manner to an old friend, whether or not he stood by you or not.

Because after all, friendship isn't just about the times he left you for nuts, but it is also about the times he stuck to you.
i dun tink he is worth the politeness at all.. jus one piece of pathetic crap that failed to stink. really sympathize tat exfren of urs at how judgemental him and his 'friends?'(if its wat he calls them) can get. nothing i can do for him.. maybe i will jus cover a tissue over tat crap i guessed.. sighz..
j said…
I just an average girl living in this cold and harsh world of hypocrosy. Without any frilly words or lacey expressions, I just wish to tell you how much your honesty matters. You say things the way you truly feel about them. Unlike most people who hid behind their facades. You can't blame these people, including me,because we succumb to society's pressures or for people like me, simply because I'm afraid to let people see the real me. Thank you for being you. For not being afraid to let your opinions known. And for inspiring many others to come out of their shells, no matter how gradual a process that is. :)

p.s. you may not have made the world any
different by being on this planet but you have
made a world's difference to me. Blog on!
Xiaxue said…
Janan: It is precisely because of this friendship we once had that I did not say his name. Theoretically, I did not even do any harm to him.

But if u are speaking about forgiveness here, I am unwilling to give it.

You have no idea how hurt I was when he said he is ashamed that his friends thinks he knows me, and how indignant I felt when he did not tell his friends the truth about me. With regards to this, it is very clear that we belong to different worlds, and it is no point trying to maintain a "friendship" - and by "friendship" he and I have very different meanings attached to it as it is.

Now that my blog has become famous, he suddenly remembers that we had a "friendship" - the same friendship that he once so actively denied? Well, he can jolly well suck my cock. I am no longer friends with him the moment he forgo-ed my loyalty.

Janan, I do not think that my reply to him was too harsh. If you asked me to write it again, it would be the exact same words. BECAUSE ... It is apparent that he still doesn't think he is wrong, or was wrong. He is still living as a self-centred, hypocritical person and convincing himself that it is ok.

I thought a blatant reply might be a good one to wake him up from that wrong idea.


Snow: Now that I am in the messy working world, I really wonder whether being honest and frank is the way to go about it.

Of course, one must be smart as to handling where and when to be honest. It is indeed tough, but I try to persist.

I wish you all the best in being true to yourself and coming out of that "shell, no matter how gradual the process"! Don't be afraid to let people see the real you - I'm sure they will accept you as you are. Those who don't? SCREW THEM. Ha ha

Love,
Xiaxue
Joe-Ann said…
I'm from NUS and sometimes, I still need help from my poly friends. :) I'm no elite just because I choose to go JC and then Uni. Everyone has their own talent, and I'm so happy for you to have lost that "friend". He's a disgrace to NUS peeps.
soulflames said…
Hi XX,
i've been a quiet fan of ur writings since "Bernard" days... always thought that reading your writings and crazy musings cheered my life at least a little. Just thought I rather remain a silent fan. But now after this, I realise I can't just keep quiet. So... eh.. be very touched arr... had to create a blog acc just to say this... Zzz... I have this to say to you, by way of thanks for all ur previous thoughts and writings that contribuited to the rare smiles on my face.

" Those who soar high in the skies will always look small to those who crawl on the ground below. - Forgot who already lah... not a goddamn NUS student (snigger)"

So cheer up, I among the many loyal supporters who have been reading ur world, we know u rock! U lost a friend u deserved, he lost a friend he DID not deserve. So who lost more? People are always like dat, bcos of material stuff we pretend n act, and after awhile we are willing to give up what friends can give us for what we can get without friends. Sad, isn't it?

Write on, stay ur usual crappy happy self, whether u like it anot, u have a loyal bunch of frens (we dun really see ourselves as fans waving XX banners... u would have to pay us...) here reading ur blog everyday, just say e word, n we'll be there. =)

Best Regards,
soulflames said…
Hi XX,
i've been a quiet fan of ur writings since "Bernard" days... always thought that reading your writings and crazy musings cheered my life at least a little. Just thought I rather remain a silent fan. But now after this, I realise I can't just keep quiet. So... eh.. be very touched arr... had to create a blog acc just to say this... Zzz... I have this to say to you, by way of thanks for all ur previous thoughts and writings that contribuited to the rare smiles on my face.

" Those who soar high in the skies will always look small to those who crawl on the ground below. - Forgot who already lah... not a goddamn NUS student (snigger)"

So cheer up, I among the many loyal supporters who have been reading ur world, we know u rock! U lost a friend u deserved, he lost a friend he DID not deserve. So who lost more? People are always like dat, bcos of material stuff we pretend n act, and after awhile we are willing to give up what friends can give us for what we can get without friends. Sad, isn't it?

Write on, stay ur usual crappy happy self, whether u like it anot, u have a loyal bunch of frens (we dun really see ourselves as fans waving XX banners... u would have to pay us...) here reading ur blog everyday, just say e word, n we'll be there. =)

Best Regards,
SNC said…
I'm just an average secondary school kid who reads your blog every few days and after reading this entry, I absolutely had to say that you are a fantastic writer (: I really liked this entry, and I read it all the way, word for word. Well half the class is a loyal reader of yours. Cheers!
I don't blog said…
Blogspot should give you a forum or something for all the new members they are getting just because we want to post a comment! :D

I got started on your blog at about that time (sent you an email telling you not to stop!) and I think you're spunky, spirited, gutsy and intelligent (nevermind if you don't have a piece of paper from NUS).

Ian is obviously a closeminded self-centered individual who is unable to see past materialistic values and see the real treasures in this world. It's people, not money, not career. Some of the best people I know don't even have a poly diploma and one is even a ex-convict. Losing this friendship is Ian's major loss, not yours.

Rest of the world, don't think so badly of civil servants and NUS people just because of one person like Ian. Other folks from NUS have posted their comments disagreeing with him and so do I. I've got good Os, good As, NUS and was a civil servant to boot! ;)

lastly, my gf thinks you rock too and read your blog more often than I do ever since that time when I introduced her.
enenmon said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
yuene said…
First off, I agree that Ian is no friend if he would care about the social status of his friends. One of my ex-best friends was like that. Just because my classmates were more Chinese-speaking she didn't want to associate with them.

Think that as long as you can get your true thoughts out it doesn't matter how you express yourself. Keep blogging, though I don't really read your blog.

Chinesetycoon, don't make sweeping statments about girls and guys. There are guys who exaggerate and girls who can't be bothered about whether they get coffee or tea.
Michelle said…
Cannot resist commenting. been reading this blog for sometime now and to be totally honest, I did not quite enjoy reading this blog in the beginning.

I thought wendy was being needlessly crude at times.

After reading it for so long now, I find that this blog is funny, well-deserving of the attention it is getting and a nice way to start the day at work - by laughing with her.

I have met people like Ian, I dont fault them for being who they are - this is what society makes us out to be.

When i first read the letter Ian wrote to Wendy, I thought he had wanted to salvage the past friendship they have had.

It was his subtle way of making amends or apologising by acknowledging how grand this blog has become. By referring to how he had helped wendy with the blog in the beginning, i find that he is trying to remind wendy the good times they have had shared together before. by describing how he is living his life now, he seems to be poking fun at his routine and boring life whereas wendy seems to be living hers to the fullest.

I felt sorry for him - although I do think he deserves the rebute wendy had given him for not standing up for her in front of his friends.

Wendy, in life we would undoubtedly meet such individuals. But each experience we emerge stronger and wiser than before.

Stick with what you believe in, live and let live a little, life would get even better =)

I adore your brutal honesty, keep writing!
luzzio said…
my blog gets about 60 hits a day...a farcry from yours :)

nyways, it is our liberty as bloggers to write what we want. and its stupid if someone discriminates you. i mean, if you don't like it, DONT read it then...
7-8 said…
Yah I know this is late but I just got a blogspot thing recently, and saw what you wrote about Fiona (in your blog, not the Maxim magazine) and to me it just stops short of being a character assassination. I suddenly thought about this piece because a friend of mine showed it to me.

I don't blame Ian at all. I know 90% of all people out there are going to side with xiaxue against Ian because there's a knee jerk sympathy reaction, one of those haves vs have-not Marxist things, but I don't blame him.

If he feels he needs to choose between you and his friends, then that's his prerogative. And I don't think the reason he's distanced himself from you is quite the reason you implied in this entry. (ie social status.)

The reason is that you're famous and that you have a big mouth. I'd be very nervous to have a friend like you.

There are things I like about your blog, you're not afraid to say what you think (but being honest is often different from being right). I like the cute-sy quirky stuff, that you probably have a libido to match the size of your ego.

What I don't like is the "this guy's not nice because blah blah blah" bitching. It's the spiderman thing, with power comes great responsibilities. If you're getting so many hits a day then you know as well as anybody else the power you have to shape popular opinion. You should use it in a nice(r) way.

Anyway this is what it looks like to me:

What has he done for you? He's helped you to set up a blog. Of course your blogging abilities have made it very popular and that credit is yours alone. But he's done you a favour as a friend.

He may have broken off ties with you but breaking off ties is like I give you 1 dollar and I take it back. Nothing is lost or gained.

What have you done for him? You've made him into some kind of asshole.

Well cards on the table now. It's less accurate to say that I'm a member of the elite, than to say that I did well at school. But in Singapore, for the first 20 years of your life anyway, they are the same thing.
Bao said…
I'm not Singaporean, so maybe I can't get as passionate about the school success/failure, inside/outside thing.

But I have to say that for all of us, life will have its ups and downs.

I think the loss of a "friend" is a traumatic thing. None of us wants to ever be the cause of such a thing. But it should not make us happy to believe or to know that it was the other's fault.

As life is lived in the present for just an instant, while the past remains with us forever, we should not cheapen our lives by hating anything that was ever a part of our past. At one time, you had considered this person your friend.

Whatever his faults, know that they are his faults, and mind your own. If it is true that you have become greater than him, then it is also true that your cruelty towards him is greater than his was towards you.

Bao?
miss_zabone said…
you can't tame the untameable.

it is very clear to me that ian needs to feel that he had this pivotal impact your evolution to becoming who / what you are today.

why?

because just as you said, he will never be able to attain that kind of memorability.

it's that 'i made you what you are and i can shut you down whenever you want' oppression that has kept women from ever attaining any kind of equality in this world. he could never support you as a friend because your power is too threatening to him. he will never amount to anything unless he is constricted, repressed, and kissing ass. but you. you can achieve by being expressive, unbridled, and honest, but most importantly on your own terms.

when i read your story the thought that kept going through my mind was how can he so blindly take the credit for something he barely had anything to do with. why does he need to keep telling you how much you need him?

without your need for him that would imply that you could do this on your own. by not needing him, he is nothing. he wanted to tell you to cut off your association with him so that you would stop blogging. he tried to use your friendship and connection against you. he visciously tried to hurt you to gain control over your creativity and he was almost successful in silencing you. he almost made you doubt yourself. isn't that funny? here you are with thousands of readers everyday and you almost allowed what he said to make you stop writing in order to 'save your friendship' with somebody who didn't even respect you.

when women break away from their dependence on anything (a man, our family, the job where we are being sexually harassed by our boss everyday, narcotics : ) we can truly become whatever we want because society has always told us we can't make it on our own. that is the biggest fuck you any woman can give society. to be true to herself. kudos for always remaining true to yourself.

from one woman struggling to always remain true to herself, in solidarity...
16X said…
If you imagine life as a path to an end, along the way, we meet lotsa people. Some just brushes your shoulders as you walk by. Some of them you stop to have a chat with them and walk a certain portion of the journey together. Some (through deliberate attempts) lead you on a roundabout path (not necesarily the WRONG one, cos who's to know what's RIGHT or WRONG but according to societal norms or religious doctrines). Some of them provide you with a walking stick which helps you along that part of the journey when fatigue sets in and you need a walking aid.

What I'm really trying to say is that: People in our life have impact us or have helped mould us somewhat into the person that we are currently. The impact may vary in magnitude. And of course, as much as we say we have chosen to be the person that we are by our own will, I still believe that without those "resistant" force jolting us into a state of chaos, we will not have otherwise emerge onto a higher plane of stability.

Just my thoughts. =)
ej. said…
HAkakakka you are fuckin hilarious!! its been a while since i've read somethin like this, and I need to thank you!! thank you for you humor!! ahhahahhaHAAH!! it's giving aches in my sides!
say it isnt so said…
dear sistah

since i was in high school, ive always lived by the saying of Boy George (a famous british pop singer) which goes like:

Popularity breeds contempt.

Well keep up the good work. At first I thought you were just a dumb blonde hungry for attention, but you actually have a point.

-anonymouse-
dissent said…
i think NUS sux big time. it seems to generally produce people of bad character, shallow minds and narrow perspectives. sigh..but at the end of the day, it's really not the student's doing but rather a by-product of the System. the system tends to promote excellence and elitism to the point of bigotry and snobbery. In NUS's bid to be the best, it has had the audacity to put down top US unis and put itself on a pedestal looking down on everyone else. This attitude does and will filter down to the students which eventually, in tandem with their narrow minds, send their egos escalating sky-high and in the process, develop snobbish attitudes.
Looking at SMU, it has used the same penetration strategy to enter the SG Uni "market" by firstly aligning itself with UPenn, then claiming its grads are "different" from other grads. Sigh...with such ideas being perpetuated within NUS/SMU grads, can we blame them for such shallowness or narcissism? Perhaps we can, perhaps we should but perhaps we must also consider the bigger picture.....
adrielch said…
Bah, it's we "mediocre", middle-class people that drive the economy. Where the **** does Ian think all his money comes from? Without the worker ants, the colony will not survive...
Beyond*n*Back said…
There are 2 sides to a coin. For that, I am always on the shinnier side. I have all the prestige in life, ended up in top schools. And an opportunity for an overseas education.

Having seen much during my years abroad had taught me how to appreciate life and friends. Everytime I return home from my studies break, I find myself isolated more and more from my current NUS/NTU friends. It seems like they are always blabbling about "7Cs" and $$$ and more $$$ and ..... so naturally after a while I melted away. When they talk about material stuff, I just listen quietly.

I believe there more to life than all these crappy material stuff. I dont really feel proud to be a graduate. I am just one in many.

By the way, when I am in Uni, not one of my intellectual female peers touched me deep inside though I must admit they are very chio n attractive. However, the first girl who touches me was somebody on the less shiny side. When she first saw me, she said :"I am not really smart in studies. I am just a normal person ..... I just know how to count 1,2,3 slowly, sorry ... pai see ....."

I saw an angel fell from the sky that day.

I had food you never knew.

Cheers ;>
blue said…
I'm sorry to hear that you have lost a friend just like that becoz he is jealous of your 'success' in the internet realm. at least right now,you know his true colours.
anyway, why should they be laughing at you when your blog writings isn't funny at all times? your writings have somehow some way touched people's lives. I have gone through that too. almost or about to lose a friend soon. anywaz, keep up the good work! (:
seleena said…
(looking from your point of view aka POV)...
I guess this just goes to show THAT GUY that having a degree or a high qualification ISN'T everything. Attitude goes a MUCH longer way in life- (a blog's content is based on the blogger's ATTITUDE & PERSONALITY, isn't it?) And your blog (linking to your attitude n personality) has enabled you to get a good job(btw,i think your job's cool too!=)), high reader ratings and even awards!

And I agree with you- he isn't a TRUE friend and ain't worth keeping. In fact, although (i infer that) he thinks your the one losing out for not conforming to societal norms and being on the "right" side of society, he's the REAL loser in the end. He's LOST a TRUE friend and (this egoistic guy who self-proclaims that he deserves credit for your achievement) just enforced the fact that he's a LOSER by sending you that email.
I loved your reply to him.:)
Keep smilin' and stay bright.
Cheers,
sel.
ranma said…
life sucks.... it's not that ian is a bad person, just that his priorities are built upon the wrong values.... it's ppl like him and his frens who are superficial and callous. but we meet ppl like that everyday dont we..... life does suck!
Xue said…
I don't know, but if I were Ian, I would be regretting I had ever introduced such thing as blogging to you.
. said…
What an in-depth to the world of XiaoXue.She is so real.An extremely talented girl in expressing her values,and a tremendously brave soul to bare her innermost naked feelings.And she is only 21!!!In her I saw a beautuful soul in quest for truth,freedom,beauty and love.She is just absolutely adorable and I wish her in every success and happiness.
He is a damn fucking asshole all rite...
san*shine said…
Dear Xia Xue,
I recently started reading your blog, I thought it was very interesting. I thought that you're being too nice to him by changing his name in order to protect him. Anyway, heck! I despise assholes like that who are too ashame to acknowledge his own friends. That's so disgusting. Well, after reading this post, I believe you've completely move on. Anyway, keep up with your writing and don't bother about what the world says about you. You are who you are. =)
If you ever go to a city named Iasi don't eat at Restaurante Iasi. Take this as my advice. They have the worst services available.
hatredgal said…
Luckily you didn't close your blog =D
Anonymous said…
Reading your blog strikes me as a person who is very frank and open to the others. You're not afraid of showing what you're truthfully to others and not succumb to measure yourself using other people's ruler.
I can understand how you feel about Ian. To me a relationship is just like a table with 4 legs There's already unstability all along. Friendship requires two parties giving in. Jealousy and suspicion can simply kill a friendship
doug3fflux said…
how different are you?
Javier Marti said…
Well, being my blogger teacher as you are, and being this an unsolicited post that I have solely and arrogantly put you in, I am proud of my chosen teacher. I liked to read you once again, this time the long "Ian" story.
Have I lost a friend through blogging? Not as clearly as yourself (I just started it public 2 months ago and my English is pitiful) but yes, I start to notice a little change in certain key people I know. And I can`t confirm yet but wonder if it has something to do with it. And my blog is nothing compared to yours!! 2000 visits as of today! But, you know what? I start to see the good results: people that don`t know me, but start to write me as if they care about my life. They are few, like 3 people so far. But it feels great.
As I write, I see that there is no point in telling you this, and you probably never read it anyway. Better for you :)
Regards
http://niquel757.blogspot.com
Anonymous said…
This is s gutsy post.

You sure have the page hits. I got here from Technorati.

This blog is a winner.
the dodely one said…
your post is awesome. thank god you didn't give up this blog for some pathetic sob. nice to see that you're frank, honest and blunt.
shiqi said…
nice style of writing and i agree with you on this one. the guy is a stuck up preppy nus snob who's EQ is probably one tenth that of his IQ-not that his IQ was high to begin with; he just probably memorized thick stacks of notes and regurgitated them out for his A levels. reading this entry really makes me world weary haha seems like singapore really bases people on that one piece of paper. hardly do you find people who excel in an alternative route-you're an example. cheers
JunAn said…
Another dont know how many hrs ive read on the comments and now finally my turn to comment.. LOLZ~

Haiz.. First let us cast away those stupid certs and come right to normal people.. SHAME ON YOU IAN.. How can you say those words to a girl?? Not even a white lie?? Im really disappointed to say that you really failed as a friend..

My thoughts..

[Ian the begin] Nice to know or even proud to know you as a friend.. You teach really well and your efforts are truly admirable as a mentor and your acts as a friend shows you really cares so much which indeed prove your value without doubt.. BUT to us readers its upon what we see.. Its only Wendy who experiences it all.. What really cause the change? Peer pressures? NO!!.. Its fear.. Im sure you know the fears in your life.. The fear of this, the fear of that, the fear of how and the fear of everything.. Which is wrong.. VERY wrong..

[Ian the end] Remorse? Sad? Im sorry.. but everything is just too late.. Whats even worst is that youre seeing a shrink? That explains the void in your heart.. You are paying someone who tells you whats right and whats wrong when even a logical person knows its wrong? Thats really bad.. But i praise you for your courage for the email even though you know whats coming at yer.. Bravo..

[Wendy] You an Aries too? If you are then you are one of the shinest star under it and im proud to be an aries too!! Wendy is amazing cause she is the type "Gan Ai Gan Hen" (Dare to like, Dare to hate) I can picture that converstion with Ian on the phonecall.. To me i shall resize it to as if slapping hard right into the face of Wendy and walk off.. Hurts so bad from the pain and defendless against her pride..
Seriously Wendy will and never would forgive him for what Ian has done. But she will hope that he will change to a better person.. And that reply on the email showing it to us all wasnt meant to degrade him but a wake up call to Ian.. In other words " Kicking his balls and tell him not to mess with me" loLZ~.. And NOT showing his name proves hope that he will change to a better person instead of what Wendy comment earlier on to rot right at the same place.. Hope Ian know how to interprete that reply and for goodness sake THINK!! NOT READ!!.. IAN YOU GOT A DEGREE LEI!!

My Conclusion

There is NEVER a right side of the system.. The only right is to do what is right and not think what is right.. Too bad for Ian wasting braincells on thinking and till the end its still wrong.. Those who are on the 'right' side dont see what we see cause they only see a part of life.. And its not
balance for those who can see what we see and otherwise gratz to you.. Coz you are smarter in some sense.. LOLZ~

Anyways just be yourself.. Go with your feelings.. Hmm its hard to explain that feeling.. You may think im just another smart ass trying to be a shrink but hey i only have an 'O' levels cert of 24 points so im not as smart as you think i am.. LOLZ~

And BTW (no point saying) Wendy.. logically you should forgive him and carry on be friends.. BUT i know you wun cause thats you.. Maybe im wrong lei LOLZ~ For me i know i wun.. muahahaz Coz "Hao Ma Bu Chi Hui To Cao" (Good horse never eats back the grass which it left)..

Weeeee.. Peace Out and Ian jia you theres still alot more for you to see!!!

JA~
Eko said…
Hi there, read this, I would reckon Ian, was writing you a letter of apology, it seems to me he realized you were not that "fake" person he thought you to be, from your blog postings. It just seems like it. However, it is unfair for him to think that being in a corporate world and being academically inclined is all that, because it isn't, it's just backup to most. As it is, what matters in life is happiness...and we all do or try at least to do things that makes us happy..

But whatever floats his boat :)
Cheers mate! You rock!
shuyin said…
hi ian, if you are looking at this blog right now, i have to say that you know little about what friends are. the only thing you care about is your reputation and how you appear among your group of friends. i am not a fan of Xiaxue's, but in this post, you are someone who needs to learn what friends are really for. wat Xiaxue said is right, you were never a friend to begin with.
Angel_X said…
I really don't know what to say...... He is somehow a victim of a thing called "tyranny of majority".

We are much like ants..... those who are not doing the "majority" stuff is considered blasphemy, "swayed", or whatever you're talking about.

He's like a father who disowned his child, and when his child become a successful person, "But I gave you your life!" He would say.

He doesn't have to protect you. He just have to walk away. Ignore is the key word, but he missed it.

He maybe a Professor, alas he just don't know how to survive in a jungle, the jungle of humanity.
Shamandalie said…
This is the best post i've read so far. My dear, if he is like that, he's not even a friend to begin with. You have not lost any friend. He's just other human. And i'm GLAD you did not shut your blog down. :)
♥teyu™ said…
its eddy isnt it?haha obvious obvious obvious from ur earlier posts ;)
Inouye.A said…
your "friend" is such a fuckin bastard. What the fucking tofu is "the RIGHT side of the system"??? Gates didn even make it through college! The bartender is having a bad life?? think again..he prolly has more of a LIFE than you(Ian)
t.i.a.n said…
hey girl,

Though this comment may have come very late, yeah, you did great! Never let other ppl's criticisms affect yourself.

As long as you are confident of yourself, you will outshine the rest of the people who only know how to criticise.

You have a wonderful blog, and just wanna let you know that, you have loyal readers who sincerely enjoys your entries. =)
Vina said…
This is a wonderfully written blog. You have a really great style of writing. There are many people who can be smart and successful, but how many are there who can be so bloody famous as you? ^^

I'm glad you didn't close down your blog, 'cause it has opened up my mind to many things since the first time I read it.

I hope I become a famous blogger like you too one day >.<
Hippoleetoe said…
Im from the states, and I just read this for the first time.

You're such an amazing writer, I cant believe he wanted you to shut down!!

I admire you and your writing. :]

Please never stop.


http://hippoleetoe.blogspot.com/

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