Too many photos!

UPDATE: I KNOW! Very nice right? Thanks so much to the very super talented ALAN LEONG of SHEARNATION.COM who did my new flash design for me! Now so Christmasy! He is very very clever right? If your company needs a designer, you know who to go to. Alan= sibeh good.

I am so angry ok? Somehow, my sleeping pattern has reverted to normal times and I am feeling quite tired now, which is 1.31am.

I know I promised "tonight", but actually, I finished writing a blog entry at 1pm today afternoon, and yes, once again, before saving, Mozilla hung on me.

I actually have ctrl-c-ed the damn entry, but somehow, I ctrl V ctrl V and NOTHING CAME OUT! *punch keyboard*

So anyway, here's the entry - rewritten. Grrr

A Teban Sunset!

I don't like Teban Gardens. In fact, whenever Kelvin, or whoever with a nice car, sends me home, I feel empathy for the car. The damn car must be thinking, "Shit man, I'm a damn Mercs, and I am parked beside some 3 room flats and a rubbish dump. Oh fuck, these inferior humps are spoiling my suspensions!" and indeed, fail to operate from then on, out of spite.

I've always told people who come to my place (surprisingly a lot of people come here although it is so out of the way and cramped) that Teban Gardens is the armpit of Singapore. Kelvin and the boys laughed and said that if Teban Gardens is the armpit of Singapore, then Geylang is the vagina.

Someone quipped, "Then what is the asshole?"

"Desker lor!" was said, amidst hearty laughter.

However, though people always give me a disgusted look when they enter my humble flat (actually they don't really "give a face" coz that's rude, but I KNOW they are grossed out), they always first look at the windows and exclaim, "Oh my god, what a beautiful view! Come and see!" ... like it is the one redeeming factor of being armpit of Singapore.

They are referring, of course, to disgusting Pandan Reservior just beside my block.

After I hear this I invariably reply, "Yeah, view can eat meh? Fuck the view, this house sucks."

Which is true! I don't understand why people get so emotional over the freaking body of water. To me, it's the same as looking at a damn postcard.

The second question people ask me is, "Why aren't you jogging everyday at the reservior? If I were you I will man, it is so convenient."


1) Reservior got Teban Ghost. No, really! Weili told me. The ghost hops from tree to tree (I wanted to end this sentence with "in glee" but refrained from the bad poetic attempt). I suggest, if you look like a tree you better not jog there, or the ghost might hop on you.

2) Reservior got scary army of little flying bugs! When I say army, I mean like a gazillion of these light, brown insects, which are small enough to be breathed in if you are close enough.


When they are not flying into my house to infest my ceiling light, they like to hover around the lampposts dotted at regular sections around the reservior, which coincidentally is the nearest light to their birthplace.

I remember I used to bring dates I like to the reservior to take a supposedly romantic scroll (I actually don't find it romantic).

These flies would be flickering by the thousands around the lampposts, and my date would be like, "What are th...?!" and when this happens I have to pull his face towards me by grasping his chin with my index and thumb, and force kiss him.

Happens up to 15 times a night sometimes. Sigh.

Oh but this photo, taken by Kelvin, is really quite nice, isn't it? But still, don't buy houses beside reserviors. You want those bugs in your house, huh?!

Carls Jr!

I told you size matters!

When to eat at Carl's Jr with Chua and Shuyin... Historic moment ok!

In years to come, I can tell my kids, "Mommy first ate at Carl's Jr at Dec 2005. Yes yes my sweeties, that's a decade ago..." in which my kids will then embrace me in a touching hug. Sob. What a wonderful life I will lead!

Beef fries!

Chua ordered some turkey thing while SY and I shared a portobello mushroom burger. :D

Ewww, like not nice one...


My verdict: Tastes way better than BK's mushroom swiss, because of the quality of mushrooms used! I think BK still uses narcissus mushrooms or something, ezech! Onions can be done without though. Hate onions.

Let me tell you a secret...

Haha a mushroom in disguise!! :D

I love yummy food!


So old right? He treated us to dessert at some swanky Bukit Timah place, called something like corduroy and fitch. I dunno lar I dunno lar!

Kel and Kit deciding on food

Super nice apple crumble!

I don't really know what this is... Chocolate puff of some sort?

I ordered foie gras!

It was supposed to come with salad but a girl needs her carbo, right? So I changed it to fries. It is so so so nice!!! One of the best I've eaten.

My god, will you look at that? I think Benny ordered an alfafa sandwich. That's so blah!

Vyasa placing his chocolate cake delicately on his...

Poor Russell! He ran around the whole of Orchard to buy a cake for Kel, with no avail coz all the shops were closed!

In the end, I went downstairs (place had two levels and we were on top) and bought a cake for Kel, and threatened to write bad things about each waiter unless they sing a bdae song for Kelvin.

And they must sound sincere when they sing it.

One of the waitresses also flashed Kelvin as a bonus (since he lived till so old)... AND KELVIN LIKES IT!

See, he so happy about it.

Pianist fingers

Non-pianist fingers

Kelvin: I am not 83 you bitch!

Vyasa: I like Wendy and I shall try to seduce her by holding my finger just tenderly beside my mouth.

I managed to make Kelvin lick the words but no one went to push his head! WAH LAU. Now the moment has passed.

Anyway in case you can't really see, the words go like "Happy 83rd birthday, handsome! We love you!"

Funny right? I like it. :D


Me plus bdae boy!

Merry Xmas!

Group photo!

When was the last time YOU could lie on a sea of guys? LOL

Heeren footballers

What do you mean by "silly pose"?!


Haha I am a professional footballer ok!

Shuyin Shuyin...



Localbrand's new tees are OUT! I know, took so long right! I love this new season's designs.

Usually Turodrique's thoughts are a bit too profound to be understood just by looking at a tee's graphics, so when he explains to me what this icon means, etc, I just pretend to nod my head and understand... :D

But this time, he is smarter! He made videos for the tees' meanings! You should watch them, the very bootilicious Linda Chia is inside TiT! :D

Speaking of hot female bloggers, our club does not welcome anyone old (when I say old I mean like if you menstrated young you could have been my mom kinda old), because when you are old, you have a wrinkly byebye. So go do something about the flaps (SKII? Bioessense? ANYTHING!) and do not even dream of associating yourself with us. You are not worthy. * Flips hair *

*Slaps self* I must stop being so bitchy.

As I was saying, my favourite tee of this season is Wusong! :D

0% Nuo Fu, understand?!

Don't you just love the way he holds the tiger's tail?

I think it is so admirable that T has so much passion in the things he believes in, like Asian pride, patriotism, etc.

I mean there are also certain things I am very passionate about, for example I am very passionate about never being shortchanged in life, and also about creamy mushroom pasta, but I sure as hell won't go make t-shirts to fuel my idealisms.

You know T is serious about supporting local brands when his upcoming Love Local sale is about giving discounts to people who prove they buy local products!


I can't believe he is indirectly supporting other tee companies too, haha.

So yes, it's great that other people are so passionate, else we will all be wearing Giordano tees proclaiming "ME" out of a sea of stupid smileys, right? :D

More blogging tomorrow. I'm sorry I took so long, I didn't mean for mozilla to hang either!

Post-note: Yes yes, reservior, reservoir, WHO CARES? Scroll, stroll... shut up. As long as you understand me, it is fine. You know what? Yes. These mistakes are delibrate. Because I don't want people to think I am too perfect - makes people feel insecure, you know? So go write your bad poems, and stop correcting people's English.

Popular posts from this blog

Raeesah Khan, GE 2020, and being labeled a Racist

The Big Gushcloud Exposé

I Photoshop A Hater