Friday, June 18, 2010

Singaporean Men: An introspection, please

Seriously what the FUCK is wrong with some Singaporean guys?? Nothing against ALL of them of course but there is a distinct bunch who are disturbingly crude, uncivilised, pervertic, horny, bitter, and worst of all, extremely opinionated.

Yes I am talking about those who contribute to disgusting forums by posting up all sorts of smut (girls' upskirts/their PRC girlfriend's vagina pics etc) and menstrating all over the internet with their perverse views.

If you have ever viewed Sammyboy forums or hardwarezone or even Stomp, you'd know EXACTLY the sort of men I'm talking about.

Sammyboy forums... Just looking at it gives me gonorrhea.

I don't actually KNOW any guy who is this disgusting in real life, probably coz my friends are like, eligible, educated dudes, but I imagine that most of these men are either old - like 40-50 plus and just learnt to use the internet and realised that you can get porno!!!!!!111111... Or they are just like dumbshit crude blue-collared workers, the sort who will whistle at girls as they walk past.

I don't know if they are unhappy with their lives, not getting any, simply mei jia jiao (no parental guidance since young) or whatever, but they are constantly ANGRY and at the same time they think they are better than everyone else.

And one more common thing? They all treat girls like sex objects.

Seriously they are so similar that I can almost always know what they are going to respond given any situation.

For example right... Some dude will post up a photo of an escort he banged and ask "How much upon 10?"

...and some other dudes will be like "look like tranny but I'd still fuck her" or "Wonder if her cheesepie is as wet and soft as her mouth (insert creepy smiley like this is funny)" or (help me here I'm trying to be as crude as them) "How much ask her to call me 92757532 Ah keong . wants to piak piak! veri intrestd".

You know what I mean lah.

I don't know WHY but they all talk in the same 'language' and it's kinda like lolspeak except for horny shit. I hearby term it HLS - stands for Horny Loser Speak.

HLS is SEXUAL BABYTALK ("wah sarpork! Cheesepie [cheebye]! Raisin [nipple]!"). Mad gross and makes all my hairs stand!! Slang is mildly funny normally but just disturbing for sexual talk, ok?!

Test your boyfriend today to see if he knows what these mean:

- piakable (fuckable)
- fapfapfap (The sound of masturbation)
- PCC (pa chew cheng - to wank)
- GPGT (got picture got talk)
- BBBJ (bare back blow job)
- GL (Geylang?)
- FR (no fucking idea what this means but it's some kinda rating so I'd guess Fuck Review? Fuck rating? Fornication rank?)

And perhaps most disturbing of all:

- GFE (From urban dictionary: Girl Friend Experience. A professional that kisses and cuddles her client and gives him intimacy like a girlfriend. A prostitute that enjoys her clients and lets them know it with kisses and not rushing.)


Wah I learnt a lot today just by researching for this article. If your bf knows any of these terms beware! He may be a forum-contributing loser!!

All men are horny and some are less... evolved than others. I get that. But why must they also have internet access?!


And I can't even avoid them because some of them leave comments on my blog!!! Whatever it is I post they just like to say that I'm ugly/plastic and they'd never wanna fuck me. Yeah *scoff* like that's ever happening.

Thank god most readers are girls now phew.

There are 3 reasons why I am triggered to write this blog post despite already knowing about these men for a long, long time.

Reason 1)

Sammyboy's "Pictures of our Sexual Escapades" section.

I was just discussing with Jess the other day about how Singaporean men love to TALK about sex A LOT. They yak and yak about how prostitutes or flings or milfs lick their "little brother" until they buay tahan and shoot their semen on whatever object. Please! Can't they just enjoy their sex and SHUT UP ABOUT IT AFTERWARDS?!

And she told me about this section in the forum where the men post up photos of their naked wives/fuck buddies/girlfriends...

And maids...

That's all fine and dandy except...

It seems like most of these girls DO NOT KNOW OF THE PHOTOS TAKEN!


And this is the grossest of all I swear I gagged a little in my mouth:


Btw you can't view the photos coz you have to have some sort of exclusive membership so yeah don't bother.

Also in the forum are prostitute reviews (never knew prostitutes had to do ass rimming and swallow cum somemore must pretend to enjoy it really FTLs), how it's like to have sex with ladyboys, and dirty ktv discussions etc. You know, all that classy shit.

Reason 2)

THIS STOMP POST. A blog reader linked me to this and it seriously infuriated me.

Anyway the page is either down or taken down coz all I could find of it is its cache so I printscreened it:

What pisses me off first of all is the kind of content Stomp relished in churning out for the past few years.

What started off as a million dollar website for Singaporeans to be a web version of The Straits Times has turned into this GOSSIPY and LOW BROW site mostly having people snap shots of unknowing citizens participating in various disgraceful activities. Like eating on the MRT or leaning on the MRT pole. Or bad parking. Or students kissing. Stupid shit like that.

And to think I was discontinued my contract with Stomp partially because I kept posting up "controversial" material with vulgar language! And IS THIS NOT CONTROVERSIAL OR VULGAR?!

People pretending to be "offended" but actually enjoying the drama

They disallowed me to use the word "bastard" but oh "petting", "stroking each other's private parts" and not to mention snapping photos of people without their permission oh that's alright.

But that's not relevant to my topic of Singaporean men.

I'm referring to the guy DS who wrote about White men who are with SG girls.

His views are exceedingly racist and narrow minded, not to mention totally bitter and biased but sadly enough, A LOT of Singaporean men share his views.

They seem to believe that the reason why Singaporean girls don't go for them is because we love White dicks.

No. We don't. Many of my eligible girlfriends have told me that they don't like Caucasians and would prefer to date Asians.

Why would we choose to date someone foreign? How I wish Mike would appreciate durians, understand when my grandparents speak in Cantonese, know Singapore roads without the gps, and eat his rice with a goddamn spoon instead of a fork. How I wish his family was here so he wouldn't have to sacrifice so much to be with me.

But he is the only guy I dated who appreciates me for EXACTLY who I am. Sadly enough, Singaporean men don't. (And he is also super cute lah)

It is disgusting how instead of improving themselves, Singaporean men prefer to put their time and effort into hating men of other nationalities and snapping photos of people on the MRT like some gossipy auntie.

Besides hating on White guys, they also hate on girls who make the choice of dating them, calling them degrading names like "SPG" and assuming that their relationship must be either based on penis size, skin colour or money.

Even though this angmoh seems to be young and good looking, DS still wonder "truly what these women see in (angmohs)". WHAT IS THERE TO WONDER?! Coz he is cute lah!! Even if he is not, cannot be any other quality one meh?!

Does it mean girls cannot like white guys if they are not rich?! What the fuck is this nonsense??!

And what's this nonsense about angmohs in SG being losers in their own country?!

That is totally untrue and even if it IS true, which is worse?

A loserly angmoh who is rich here in SG, or DS, who is a loser in SG and will be even more of a loser in the angmoh's home country?!?!


Such an asshole. Ownself taking MRT and judging people who take the MRT. Well at least that angmoh is minding his own business and not snapping photos of others on the MRT like some shifty-eyed pervert. Infinite L on the forehead.

Kudos to LV bag lady for dating a "poor" and young angmoh and proving not all of us girls who date white guys are sluts in for the money!!! xoxo

Reason 3)

This blog post is written by someone anonymous who was determined to give 1001 reasons why he HATES Singapore (I'm going to call him 1001), and I was reason 19:

So sweet!! In a way this means he thinks I represent Singapore. Love!! NOT.

Ignoring the fact that a Singaporean can come up with so many reasons to hate Singapore, including having to wear seat belts... You know what? Let's NOT ignore that. I'm gonna talk about it.

I fucking HATE Singaporeans who are constantly complaining about Singapore. Even before I got relatively well-off and lived in a 3 room flat I have always LOVED living in Singapore.

It is fucking fantastic! It is SUPER safe, which is SO underrated by Singaporeans. Just ask anyone from anywhere else (besides Japan I guess) how scary it is to be mugged! Even Malaysian friends from across the border admit that burglary is frightening common and has occurred to them or they know someone it has occurred to. I don't even KNOW any Singaporean who has been burglarized before.

No homeless people here, the govt is not corrupt, the food is fantastic, and exciting new things are ALWAYS happening!! The roads are lined with pretty trees and our airport has free wifi... Always a joy to step back into Changi airport after trips overseas. Sure we have our flaws. So we are sterile and rigid. Every country has flaws. But all in all, Singapore is an excellent place and that's why we have so many people wanting to migrate here.

But instead of appreciating or being proud of our tiny city, many Singaporeans like 1001 here decide to nitpick. Instead of giving 1001 reasons why "Sillypore" sucks, why don't you come up with 1001 reasons why your existence in Singapore makes Singapore suck?

I'd give you reason no. 1: You contributed to "Singaporeans make stupid remarks online", because "Sillypore" is a dumbshit nickname. Surely you can do better. How about Stupidpore? Or Spasticpore? Singapuke? Stinkypoo? or Singingpore? Coz pores can't sing, right? MUAHAHAHA!!

Here's one more reason to add to the 1001 reasons - no. 342: Many Singaporeans choose to complain but contribute nothing to their country, or to society in general.

Yeah. So you want to migrate, Mr Loser. Don't worry, you surely won't leave an imprint here. And let me know when another country wants your whiny ass! ;)

Sorry for the digressing.

So. I was reading that article (also linked by reader), and I seriously don't give a shit about people feeling that my blog is overrated. Some people like it and some don't. So be it.

But then I saw the bottom of the entry where 1001 showed 6 links of blogs he DOES like.

Since he hates that I'm the top blogger in Singapore, I am assuming 1001 believes that THESE bloggers right there should be representing us instead.

I have not seen some of the links but as I clicked on all of them, I nearly laughed my ass off.

1 to 4 are dumbshit chicks who show their cleavage on most pictures and have no opinions except demure ones. (ok to be fair no. 4 never show cleavage)

1 and 2 are race queens/lingerie models.

3 is a liar and plagiarizer who is ashamed of her own heritage.


Like literally photos of ass and tits and cheebye with no face. Just stupid sex stories gloried as "art".


When it comes down to it, THIS is what Singaporean men like and want.

A demure, unopinionated dumb girl with big boobs (must be pretty with conventional long black hair and big eyes of coz) who are really horny.

And this is what they EXPECT from Singaporean girls!

Now how many modern Singaporean girls whom you know who are like that?!

And summarizing, here is the general consensus. These men are bitter because no decent girls would EVER be with them. Singaporean girls are smart and educated and a lot of us dress well and look presentable. But they don't want that. And we them. Because we look down on these guys and think we deserve more than them, they get ANGRY.

When they get angry, they bash Singaporean girls and any other factor that contributes to SG girls not liking them (ie angmohs), and sing praises for China girls with no opinions (and thus won't humiliate or mind their flaws so much).

But wait. Looking upon the behaviour of these embittered SG men with such a serious chip on their shoulders, can you blame us girls?!?!

Who would want to date a man who hides a camera during sex and SUBMITS THE PICTURES TO A FORUM?!

Who would want a man whom, instead of being proud of his woman's intellect, feels that it bruises his ego?!

Who would wanna hear a guy whine all day about everything that sucks around him (except himself of course)??

Can you see a guy who snaps random photos of strangers on MRTs... EVER GET LAID?!

So yeah... I am talking to you chauvinistic fucktards out there.

Stop making disparaging/sexual remarks on women, because it is an unchivalrous thing to do. Didn't your mother ever teach you when you were a little boy? No matter how much you think I'm ugly, I'm still a girl, so treat me like one! In fact, treat all women with respect!

And yes even though you guys don't like to hear this, Caucasian counterparts DO treat women with much more respect than local guys. Yeah I said it. You know what? When I'm in malls in the states, nobody yells bullshit at me like the guys in Sim Lim do. Fact.

Instead of being so bitter, why don't you start an introspection and improve on yourself?

So you are poor - well maybe you can make it up by being loyal and nice. If you are ugly, improve your looks!! WORK ON YOUR ATTITUDE! And stop visiting brothels!! You think you gonna find a nice decent girl there?!

Coz since all you people are doing is sitting on your pimply asses commenting on girls and issues and WHINING like no tomorrow, it is no surprise your self worth is now less than that of a used pad.

Yeah, everyone wants to date a bitter loserly man.

It is not Singaporean women who have to change, it is YOU MEN.

p/s: I am obviously not talking about ALL Singaporean men, just the sort that I've described here. If you are angry, it is because you are one of them and you suck.

p/p/s: Singaporean girls are not in the discussion so if you wanna talk about that, do it on your own blog post and not on my comments. They will be deleted.